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ABC's of Self-Realization: Regarding Responsibility

Updated on August 2, 2011

One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes... and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility.Eleanor Roosevelt

Whatever happens, take responsibility. - Tony Robbins

This topic hits home with this author every single day. Today is no exception. One major life lesson learned is that when someone makes an agreement to do something, only to find they must back out for whatever reason, it doesn’t make them a liar. It allows them to realize that they can “re-negotiate” their commitment to that project. When all is said and done, the whole transaction must be held in highest regard. Re-negotiating means respectfully declining, when necessary. It means keeping in mind that the person who is being denied the help is the one who must find another avenue in which to get that project done. It means doing whatever can be done to be honest, forthright, and dependable, after all is said and done. It means that in the re-negotiating, that another offer is made, if possible or if necessary.


Responsibility is not fulfilled in as much completeness as it could be when the choices and actions are made through impulsive thought. If the choices made are from a pure heart with the highest intention, they are all fine and well. If that highest intention is fraught with non-clarity, if the choice is made without clear knowledge of what that choice entails, that is fine, too. That’s where the option for re-negotiating comes into play.

Re-negotiating a project is just one area that responsibility pertains to. Responsibility is seen in several forms: it is meant for those who take care of everyone else first. It is meant for those people to realize that they must be kind and good to themselves before they can give 100% to the well-being of another. It means that self-love is not arrogant or totally narcissistic. That self-love is coming from a higher awareness, a conscious awakening that sees that we are all one, we are all individually as important and worthy as every other person we care for, work for, or just choose to help in whatever way we can.


There is responsibility for all choices we make, due to the freedoms we are given as a people. With free will comes much responsibility. It is awareness about looking at the long-term consequences of the current choices that are made.

Another important thing to remember about responsibility is this: never give up on doing the best you can, in spite of having to let someone down. Never think in total “black and white”, assuming that because you have not been able to follow through, that you are a complete failure – because you are not! Don’t beat yourself up for not being able to do something you truly believed you could do. Also know that you cannot change the reaction the other party gives you, but know, too, that if it is a negative reaction, it doesn’t mean that person won’t continue to be a friend, if that’s what they were to begin with.

Lots of times, people can’t finish something they wanted to start and that’s okay. Because we are human, we are given the chance to start again. We are allowed “do-over’s” and that makes living a little easier. We are all perfect even in our imperfection. The most we can do is just continually strive towards excellence, since nobody can ever be perfectly faultless.



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    • Lene Lynn profile imageAUTHOR

      Lene' Lynn St. John 

      7 years ago from Glendale, AZ

      Denise, thank you! I love being useful! :) LOL! :) You have made my day today with all your wonderful comments! You are sweet! :)

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 

      7 years ago from North Carolina

      Beautiful, wise words-rated it useful.

    • profile image

      Lene Lynn 

      7 years ago

      Wheel, good for you! I am glad you know how to say "No." I first said it back in 1990 to a lady at church regarding a project and she never spoke to me again, which is a shame because I didn't mean "No, forever!" I applaud you! Thanks for stopping by! :)

    • wheelinallover profile image

      Dennis Thorgesen 

      7 years ago from Beatrice, Nebraska U.S.

      I have a saying taped to my computer which helps guide me everyday. It says we are responsible for what we do and say no matter how we feel. In years past people felt I failed at this when I didn't feel good. Guess what they were right.

      I renegotiate more often than I would like. It seems to be a way of life. I am too much of a yes person. In recent months I have learned how to say no and when to say it.

    • profile image

      Lene Lynn 

      7 years ago

      Hi Carlon, it most assuredly does! :) Thanks for the compliment! :)

    • Carlon Michelle profile image

      Carlon Michelle 

      7 years ago from USA

      This article goes hand in hand with building self-esteem. Great job. Smile!

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