Achievable Goals vs Trap Goals
One of my habits is watching other people: how they run their lives, manage their obstacles and where they are going in life. I often ask people about their goals and personal skills. One of the things that motivates me to do so, is to validate the theories I discuss in my book, “5 Essential Dimensions”.
I’ve noticed that too many people are setting their goals without full consciousness of their brain centers. More often than not, people set their long term goals, emotionally, after a problem. They try to then prove themselves to others — that they are qualified, or financially strong, but usually it backfires.
For example: If I had a problem and I went to my relative asking for help, but he let me down, or I talked to a friend and he decided not to help me, then, my typical human reaction would be that of: ‘I don’t need you anymore, or I can handle it myself’. These calamities are the ovens that initially cook these goals, but the problem is that these goals are ‘spiced’ with emotion.
Here is the conundrum — setting goals with logic, analysis, and awareness leads to goals that may never be achieved or are not a good fit for us. When we set goals with emotions as our 100% driving force, we will not reach them in the beginning and we then set goals that cannot realistically be achieved.
How to Achieve Our Goals
If my goal is to prove to someone else that I am financially independent, there is no way to achieve this goal because you will never know for certain whether or not this person will perceive me as ‘financially independent’. When we set our long term goals, usually we need years to reach them and by that time, after five, six, seven or even ten years have passed, we find that the goal we once thought to achieve is no longer a suited fit for us or it was a mistake. So we need to be more conscious of the process of setting our goals; where our emotions are invested as well. We need to be smart in setting our goals when we put action into our plans. In a sense, we need to design our goals. There are numerous books available today in which the strict focus is on ‘How to set goals', both reasonable and achievable. My primary focus, as of this moment, is about the ‘process of setting your goals.’ Life, with all its variables and changes becomes quite complicated, and a complicated life requires complicated goals. In order to achieve a complicated goal you must satisfy five equilibriums - the financial, social, internal, physical, and spiritual.
The goal qualifications are as follows. Your goals must be:
- Time Based
Setting long term goals are a trap for frustration as well as setting goals that do not fit us. Setting goals that do not fit us is a trap because, after years have passed, we realize that the goal(s) are irrelevant to us. These traps in which we fail to meet our goals were made with emotion or as a reaction to problems we were facing at one point in time of our lives. We cannot say: “My goal is to be a pilot”, then go ahead and study medicine for 10 years. We need to keep our ideas congruent with the direction in which our lives are moving.
Planting the Seeds for Your Goals
If your aim is to make a complete shift from your current situation or career, you will have more power to shift your career when you are financially stable, make the right connections, have a clear plan of action, the flexibility for change and the time available for the shift. If you begin shifting your career to your dream job too early, then you are likely to fail due to financial restraints, support, or readiness.
Goals are similar to that of seeds. In this case, we’d seed the goal and water it every day. Our brain centers tend to pull us towards a dream job; such as being a pilot, a column writer or maybe even a race car driver, but in reality we have more success when we are selling something or offer services that are beneficial to others. Each goal has it’s necessary conditions (much like a plant) that must be met to achieve a successful outcome. For every goal, care must be taken to ensure your success. Seed your new goals with full consciousness of your previous success. The best goals, in our life, are goals that fit our capabilities, optimize our resources, and are began from our success. Stick with your strengths. If you have small successes in your current field, forget about the those far off dreams for the moment, because success will lead to success.