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Advice for The Victims of Gamblers

Updated on November 8, 2016

Gamblers

Roulette
Roulette | Source
Slot machines.
Slot machines. | Source
Gambling games can be addictive.
Gambling games can be addictive. | Source
Card games.
Card games. | Source
Gambling moments.
Gambling moments. | Source

A Gambler's dream never Stops

Gambling and Relationships

Gamblers are heavy smokers and drinkers and don't care about the way others are hurt by their actions. They do what makes them happy while their loved ones become unhappy and lonely.

The problem with gamblers they are the happiest when bets are on and waiting on that ticket enlightens their moods.

Most relationships don't survive the gambling problem.

Gambling is a horrible problem. The gambler must admit the problem. A gambler will not change if the individual does not recognize their problem.

You can love him as much as you want but if you continue to stay with a gambler you are doomed.

Lies becomes a way of life for a gambler. A gambling addict lies, and steals from anyone. Over time the situation deteriorates. The gambler knows the behavior is wrong, and admitting the addiction is a problem. Alienating loved ones is most painful.

A gambler will wake up from a trance when a huge loss has taken place, and would not like to be disturbed while gambling.

The best is to stay away from a gambler who is out of control.

Trying to get back your losses is maddening.

It is exceptionally hard to live with a gambler. When you are constantly told of how costly life has become and still the gambler will find the time to gamble their earnings away.

The woman is no longer with her partner he left her penniless.

Access, time and money are the needs of a gambler.

Whether online of offline gambling is still a problem if you don't when to stop that horrible behavior.

Change is difficult for a gambler.

When do you become the victim to a gambler's life?

You may not see gambling as many people do but you become the victim when the gambler risks everything you have both worked so hard for and for one of you to go and lose it all on gambling.

You can use gambling as a pleasurable outing. You don't have to avoid gambling, or be guilty of gambling. It can be exciting but when you lose control of the gambling behavior, your problem gradually increases.

A gambler does not know how to stop or when to stop at gambling.

Gamblers use their behavior to get away from normal day to day d to lives.

In this case the gambler did not show the signs of gambling immediately, this happened over the years of their marriage.

It is like any other addiction. You only see the problem when it is too late. After huge amounts of money had been spent.

Gambling Issues

She had a problem with her husband's habits. He was a compulsive gambler.

I don't know how much more one can become fed up of that addictive habit of gambling.

The situation had deteriorated, and the problem went on with the same mistakes.

These mistakes are once again repeated in the second marriage.

The exact same occurs like he is dwelling in the past, and holding onto something that no longer exists.

This time the gambling is slowly ruining her so I decided to help as a good friend.

She had tried and tried to get him to stop or lower the cost of gambling.

He tried even harder to get her into the gambling game.

The long wait is an ongoing process. To wait for that ticket that does not show up as the winning ticket is another problem.

The gambling as far as I am concerned is not going to bring light to their married life.

It would drive them apart more and more and day by day.

A sad life for two people when he goes on like this not thinking of what is supposed to be important.

It looks like everything is falling apart and he can't or fails to see how his habits are affecting his loved ones.

Conversations have failed when his money belongs to him, and only him he can do whatever he wants to.

How can a family feel safe if the gambling has taken over their lives?

A family is supposed to be safe, through their financial lives and through their emotional lives. In this case the gambling is causing a lot of insecure moments.

They are afraid he will sell their belongings, or will secretly take loans and would want others to bail him out.

A tough situation and is becoming a daily problem.

I know the gambling problem is not the woman's fault she did not know from the time of meeting this man that everything in her life would go down so badly.

It can be exhausting to cope with such an individual.

Sometimes the individual looks drained from her energy and tired with worry.

The best advice as follows:

We had discussed the gambling issue and came to a few decisions.

No one can force him to stop the daily gambling.

You can't change the way the gambler thinks, only you change the way you think and do.

Only he can acknowledge that part about him.

Don't blame yourself for what the gamble fails to see or acknowledge.

Gambling can put a heavy load on any relationship.

Be open in conversation when with the gambler. They got to know how you feel directly.

Don't take the strain of gambling on your shoulders it is not your problem or your fault.

Sometimes talking or discussing the gambling problem won't make sense to the gambler.

The gambler can look at you funny for letting them know of their gambling problem.

The wrong idea would be is to try and be in charge of a gambler's life.

If you think you can have control over a gambler's life then be ready for the unhappy you.

Gamblers don't admit their addiction and that can be the worst of all on your list of advice.

Don't be unhappy be positive and free from that thought.

You can try to support a gambler only to certain limit.

Don't protect the gambler that would not work out well for you.

A gambler must show responsibility for their gambling behavior.

Lies comes in quickly you don't need to help them with their issues. It is time for a gambler to control their debt and their lives.

Always tell a gambler you don't have any money. Giving money to gambler is like crucifying you.

Protect yourself from the gambler's life and debt.

When a gambler is penniless you can be in the same shoes if you help out the gambler financially.

Do not let the gambler know how much money you have in your bank account that would draw the individual to your money.

Avoid speaking of figures.

Be in control of your life and finances.

A gambler does not spend money on any pleasure moments mainly on gambling and wait on targets with money.

It is most difficult to trust a gambler.

Social lives are horribly affected.

They become isolated and love it that way.

Everything stops in a person's life when with a gambler and the individual does not see that as a problem.

You can try to seek professional help and on most times that too can fail.

Enjoyable times are lost and one can become very lonely.

You need to take care of you and don't think of what the gambler is up to.

Eat correctly and be happy and live your life.

Communication completely fails when a gambler is just focused on bets.

You can't make a conversation if a gambler looks elsewhere. You need the attention of the individual not the shadow or a glance.

Gambling Addictions

The Gambler in your Relationship

How would you cope with a Gambler in your Relationship?

See results

Gamblers are Helpless

I enjoy writing and it makes me feel good.
I enjoy writing and it makes me feel good. | Source

© 2014 Devika Primić

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    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      You have done well with your help to a friend in need. This is good advice. Only they will know when it is time to walk away.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Addictions will hurt everyone in the family....you have done a great service for your friend. Well done.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Ericdierker great words from you thank you.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      billybuc thank you so glad you came by

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 2 years ago from New York

      You have truly stood by your friend. Gambling, like any other addiction, needs professional help. We don't always see our addictions as "addictions" and that is the worst part.

      Voted up, useful, and interesting.

    • D.A.L. profile image

      Dave 2 years ago from Lancashire north west England

      Devika,

      You are good and loyal to your friend . In your text you write " he chooses gambling as a priority and nothing more than that" I am afraid the writings on the wall, unless you excellent advise is heeded. I Just hope for your friends sake it is. Another excellent article,voted up,interesting and very useful.

    • Colleen Swan profile image

      Colleen Swan 2 years ago from County Durham

      Gambling is a terrible addiction that destroys lives, usually the innocent partner in the relationship. I use the term impulse control disorder. From my experience, even the gambler who brings this addiction under control will at some time in the future fall back into it.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 2 years ago from Southern Illinois

      Good advice. My sister was married to a addicted gambler, it destroyed their marrage....Thank you...

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 2 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      I'm sorry that your friend has such a big problem, Devika. An addiction to gambling is a horrible situation. As usual, you have given some good advice in your hub.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Isaac Weithers 2 years ago from The Caribbean

      You share good advice and helpful perspectives on this killer addiction. It kills relationships and families, and is like a curse victimizing the innocent. Thanks for taking it on.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      tillsontitan it is always a nice way to show good friendship if one can help the other in need. Thank you for the vote up, interesting and useful I appreciate your encouraging words.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi D.A.L S o kind of you to constantly stop by. I appreciate all votes from you have a great day.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Colleen Swan thank you kindly for stopping by I appreciate your comments.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      always exploring thank you for stopping by gamblers ruin most relationships

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      AliciaC thank you very much for stopping by

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      MsDora thank you kindly for sharing your views here.

    • Susan Recipes profile image

      Susan 2 years ago from India

      Thanks for the advice, I hope all gamblers read this hub of yours.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Susan Recipes thank you for sharing your mind here I appreciate your kindness.

    • DREAM ON profile image

      DREAM ON 2 years ago

      Once again you bring out your skills and teach others about many important subjects. Gambling has become a big problem in the United States. I think people turn to gambling when their life is lacking something. There are many places you can play for fun instead of money. This way it is only a social get together and not money or the lives of your loved ones at risk.

    • DDE profile image
      Author

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi DREAM ON So true about people lacking something in their lives and to focus on gambling using that as a void. An important subject and so many don't want to admit their gambling issues. A gambler does not think their addictions are hurting anyone. Thank you for sharing your thoughts here.

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