10 Anger Management Tips
The most natural way to express anger is to act aggressively, it inspires strong behaviors that allow us to fight or defend ourselves when we are attacked. But that does not mean we can attack anyone who annoys or even irritates us. Laws, common and social senses places limits on how far our anger can take us. But then again there are instances or events that push us over the edge. In order to prevent that, here are some tips for controlling your anger.
1. Find ways to calm yourself.
Deep breathing and picturing a relaxing scene or repeating a calming phrase like "Slow down" or "Take it easy " can help take away your anger.
2. Think carefully before you say anything !!!
When you are angry, it is so easy to start blowing up and start cursing or saying vile things to your target. Pause a while and take a deep breath. This will help you avoid saying things that you will regret or cause more trouble later.
3. Take a brisk walk or a short run.
Physical activity makes your brain release endorphins (the "Feel Good" hormone) which gives you a sense of well being. So, before you even come near to blowing up, take a brisk walk or a short run.
5. Use “I” when describing a problem to avoid criticizing or pointing fingers at others.
This is very important as people react negatively when they feel they are being blamed for something. By using "I" you make it appear that you are taking the blame and not as so much assigning it to the others.
4. Work with the people who have angered you.
Do this when you are calm to make sure that the person or people who have angered you will also be calm. This way, you will all be able to focus on the problems at hand.
6. Using humor.
Try imagining yourself or the other person in a funny situation. This usually calms the mind. Don't use sarcasm though; it will just make matters worse if the others feel that you are mocking them when you tell them about the funny incident.
7. Don't hold grudges.
Be forgiving to the people who have angered you. This is a great way to show them that you are not angry anymore. But don't think that the other people will follow your example. It is unrealistic to think that all people should behave the same way as you.
8. Make an anger journal.
Write down all situations that set you off in an "anger logbook". This keeps track of your reactions to everyday situations. This is a very useful tool in keeping your anger in check as you can review the situation and try to solve it on a latter date.
9. Get a body massage and learn some relaxation skills.
As your tense muscles are unknotted by the body massage, you will feel calm and relaxed. Learning a relaxation technique like a deep breathing exercise can also help you control your anger as being relaxed and de-stressed can stop your temper from flaring up.
10. Let go of your anger.
Now that you have your anger under control, you can start expressing it without damaging any relationships or properties. Anger management is not equivalent to bottling it up. Pent up anger can really damage your health as anger can really bring your blood pressure up.
Of course, if these simple anger management techniques do not work for you, you should start looking for other options like talking to a family member, friend or a counselor. And, as a last resort, you can try joining an anger management class.
© 2007 Shanti Rose