- Death & Loss of Life
Another letter to my mom in Heaven....
Mom, in case I didn't tell you often enough, you are the most amazing mom I could have ever asked for.
Mom -- I miss you...I miss you so much!
Where do I start? I miss you more than I can say. I know you are with the Lord, and the very second your heart stopped beating, when you took your last breath here on earth, your next breath was in Heaven.
But I still miss you... I still cry as I go through life with this huge whole in my heart.
Faith cried on Valentine's day -- missing you, and wanting to be able to show you all of the new songs she can play on the piano. I cried with her, for her, and for my own pain in knowing I will not see you again this side of eternity.
I have had very real visions of you dancing with the Lord, and the babies that had to leave our family much too early. You were dancing and laughing with these sweet little babies.
I had another vision of you playing a very large piano or organ, with enormous pipes like the pipe organ at St. Mary's. You were very serious, but so serene. You were playing praise songs for the Lord in His presence.
Dad says he feels your presence in the evening when he is alone at home. He says that he actually begins to talk to you, and then realizes you may be there, but are not going to be able to respond.
Sadly, the dogs sometimes confuse my arrival to visit dad with the days you would come home from work. I can see how excited they are, and then they seem confused. Amazing, even the animals grieve your absence in our daily lives.
All of these things are wonderful, but the truth is mom, I still miss you.
I miss picking you up and getting coffee.
I miss lunch at the River Crab and Olive Garden.
I miss solving the world problems like we did so well.
I miss how we both shopped so quickly and didn't waste time.
I miss you. I miss everything about you.
Today Faith is sick. I miss having you call and ask, "how's our little sweetheart doing?"
March 6th is your 81st birthday -- you were the most amazing 80 year old woman... so youthful, so beautiful.
March 30th is the anniversary of your home going... never has my heart hurt more deeply than the day I said goodbye to you.
Mom, mama, mommy... the most precious person in my life...save me a spot near to your and the Lord, when I get there we will have so much to catch up on.
I love you mom, to eternity and back, I love you.