When Authors Fight Depression
After leaving high school, I left it up to a coin toss to decide whether or not I would begin a career in writing. Sadly to say, the the coin came up tales. That meant I was to leave my idea of becoming a published author behind and instead opt for a nine to five job.
I worked for the mail service for around four years. I left at the end of 2009 as I felt I was heading nowhere. I decided that I would flip the coin over and go down the path I was supposed to.
I began writing as an amateur by publishing short stories about anything I could think of and publishing them on the now dissolved website Bibliofaction It was there that I learned how creative I could be. The comments people left me weren't all good, but they were all constructive and helped me to further my skills and check my work better.
Now, this isn't an article that tells you how to leave your nine to five job and become really successful over night, earning up to £500 per day. Mainly because If I knew the secret on how to do that, I would be lying on a beach somewhere and not posting this secret online. Also, if you think working from nine to five is bad, then working for much longer than that won't suit you.
I have lost count how many hour i have racked up whilst trying to establish my writing career, and I am still in the middle of doing so. I have worked at most 14 hours in one day. Oh sure, I worked from home, but imagine working from home but never leaving the one room for hours on end apart from a few toilet breaks. This is the secret to working from home and being your own boss. Hard work and the feeling that things won't get better. So why do people do it?
Has depression ever affected your work?
I began battling depression and anxiety in early 2014. To add to my already shaking nerves, I was about to add the finishing touches to my eBook Rise of the Silver Dragon Book One. I worked on it all day and every day. Many more hours were put into fixing the problems I had created when trying to fix the original problems with the book. My hands would shake over the keyboard and I swore that half the time I was writing utter gibberish. It got to the point where I had to put the laptop down and stick my head out of the window for some fresh air.
When I started using medication to calm me, I found that my head was blank. I had no idea how to change, improve or expand my story. For that reason I ended up neglecting my work and started lying around the house just waiting for my medication to finally kick in.
I switched to gaming. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Writing is a hard job and it is good to unwind at the end of the day. But I did nothing but gaming and eat junk food. I felt awful and ashamed.
Once the medication had kicked in I felt very neutral again. It wasn't the kind of medication that got you sky high, but rather the kind that removed the depression and anxiety. That was fine by me.
I returned to my manuscript only to find that I had no idea where I had left off. I didn't know what I was supposed to remove or what was to be fixed. That was when I decided that I would go over my book with a fine tooth comb and finally try to perfect the story I had worked on for so long.
I loved my story and I still do. Every author will tell you the same thing. A story is like an author's baby. You nurture it, take care of it and make sure it goes out into the big bad world as best as it can be. I almost gave up on my baby due to depression. But I'm glad I didn't.