- Quality of Life & Wellness»
- Personal Development
Become attractive… Attract anything you want in life
Have you been trying to reach something for a very long time and have not gotten any closer to it? Well, if you answered yes, you are not alone, most of us have lived the same experience, but that is not the only way of living; there is another way, and you are free to take it and use it. You don’t have to settle for what you have now, you can get anything you want if you feel worthy of it.
Let’s suppose you want money, and you are not just like others who only say what they want but are not willing to do their part of the deal, you are a hard-working person and you give your whole strength to get what you want. If you keep working so hard in order to get the money, it does not matter if you break your bones working, you will never have enough.
What are you trying to say here?
I am not trying to say that money is a bad thing. Most of us grew up in an environment where it was pretty common to hear sentences like, “Money does not grow on trees”, “Money is dirty”, “Money is the root of all evil”, and many others. Sounds familiar? We were programmed to believe that money is something so far away from us that we need to work really really hard in order to get just the money enough to survive ‑and maybe, if we are lucky, a little more.
Let’s pay attention to one particular thing in this subject. It does not matter if I fulfill my “dream” of getting my first million dollars, it won’t be enough, I will not find the satisfaction in it, so I will need to keep working and working, but yet again, it will never be enough.
"Satisfaction lies in the effort, not in the attainment, full effort is full victory". -Moahandas "Mahatma" Gandhi
Let me explain myself…
Many people are so careful with the money that they never get it! They don’t buy the clothes they want, they don’t eat where/what they want, they don’t go where they want, they don’t visit the people they want, etcetera. They only buy what they can afford. It is very likely that this people hardly get in any debt ‑that could be the only bright side of it.
But here is the thing...
When I am too worried about the money I am declaring that I just don’t have enough, and that I “need” more money! So, when I am focused on the money that I don’t have I will work and work, and work some more until I get “enough”; but I will never feel satisfied with the money I have, because I am working to get money, I will count the money in my pockets and it will never be good enough for me, because every day I “need” more things. I am working for the money, that means I have become a slave of the money, and as everybody knows, the owner of the slave never gives him/her the opportunity to be free, and of course, he will never switch places with the slave. So I will be in the hamster wheel forever, or at least until I make the decision to change, and to find my freedom.
"The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude". -Oprah Winfrey
So… What should I do?
I always compare the money with an attractive lady. Everybody loves an attractive lady; anybody would want to take her out, but only a few get to be with her. She knows she is desirable, she knows she can be picky, and she will choose only the best one, not the better looking guy, but the most confident one, and the one who looks more successful. Maybe I can be brave enough to go talk to her, but if I only do it because I don’t care about being rejected and not because I believe in myself -that I am worthy of being with her-, my attitude will reflect the way I feel, and I will be showing so much fear that she won’t feel attracted to me, she will feel uncomfortable; and it doesn’t matter how many times I try it, it doesn’t matter if I beg her to be with me, it won’t matter if I offer to give her the world, the moon and the stars; no matter what I do, no matter how much “hard work” I put into this endeavor, more likely than not she will not want to be with me, maybe I get to spend some time with her while I am trying to gain her attention, but I will only be annoying her; she will be looking at her watch expecting me to go away as quickly as possible. Oh! and if I try to go talk to her with a cheese line, I better get ready for rejection far in advance.
So, if I want to have a chance with her I need to believe in myself enough to exude confidence (just confidence, not arrogance); See myself successful. I must believe that I am worthy of her, I need to remind myself that I deserve to have anything (or be with anyone, in this case); I must look at my best, perfectly clean, cool hairdo, nice fragrance, well dressed, walk straight, have a confident look in my eyes, be a good listener, have a good subject to talk about, be a gentleman, be spontaneous, make her laugh, and do anything in my power to make her enjoy the time she spends with me, and enjoy my time with her. I have to let her know that I don’t “need” her, I went to talk to her only because I decided to be with her, because I choose her, not because all the other girls ignored me and there was no one left. I go to her because I know I am worthy of the best, worthy of having what I want, and worthy of being with whoever I decided to be with (I don’t intend to sound arrogant or to encourage you to be one, I am only saying I have to find the equilibrium between being humble and knowing my own value). This way she will be the one who wants to be with me, I won’t need to try as hard as I was trying before. She will look at me because girls love confident men. Now I will be attractive to her. See my point? (Note: This was just a comparison to make an example, not a lesson about picking up girls. No disrespect intended here).
For me money works in pretty much the same way. If I pay too much attention to it, it won’t look back at me, I need to become attractive to it, I need to be well prepared, worthy of it, and I have to make it want to be with me. I must know that I don’t “need” the money, I choose to have it because I will give it a good use; I don’t need money to be happy and to feel complete, I am already happy, and I am already successful. Then the opportunities will come and money will follow. See the difference? I still work, but I don’t do it for the money, I work for the satisfaction that comes along with loving what I do, and I worked on myself, on becoming successful, and when I am successful the money wants to be with me, money does not give me the success, but the success gives me the money.
Money is not a bad thing, and it is not far away from our way, we just need to be attractive enough so it can look back at us and want to go home with us. Money is just one thing. This works for anything you may desire. What do you want from this life? Anything you want, you must become attractive for it, and it will come your way.