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Being A Man in 2019

Updated on November 13, 2019
Andrew Bennett Collins profile image

Andrew has been an Okie for 30 plus years. He has spent the majority of that time complaining about things.

Being a Man in 2019

Despite what some in the deepest corners of the internet will have you believe, it is NOT a difficult time to be a man. Men are not the victims of some grand conspiracy aimed at ending their way of life or well being. Men are not now nor have they ever been the most persecuted sex.

But, times are changing for men. The outlook on manhood has changed. What is and isn't acceptable for us is different than it was in years past. That is okay. That isn't anything we as men should be worried about. Times may be different, but that doesn't mean they are worse.

1. Men are allowed to have emotions now.

If you would like to see the biggest difference in how men handle emotions try this experiment. If you are a male and your father is still in your life, call him or text him and just say "Hey Dad, just wanted you to know I love you." It is in this exchange we can see clearly the difference between us and our fathers. There isn't anything wrong with being able to say I love you. Nor is there anything wrong with being made to feel slightly uncomfortable by the phrase. However, in 2019 that should be your option.

You need to know that no matter where you end up on the scale of emotions, your's are valid. No one can force you to be any more or less emotional than you already are. Any societal pressure you feel surrounding your feelings should be disregarded. It is for you to decide.

Emotions are something that you can get better at! If you want to, that is. Showing and expressing emotions properly and in a healthy way takes time and practice. Just like learning to play an instrument or to speak another language, it is going to feel strange at first. If it is something that you desire however, we as a society should applaud you.

2. You can be proud of your female counterparts

Be it a wife, mom or sister, it is one hundred percent okay to take pride in the accomplishments of the women around you. It takes nothing away from us as men when we recognize the hard-working women we encounter in our daily lives. Understanding that our world is sometimes made for men to succeed and women to fail, makes the accomplishments of women even more impressive.

More importantly, though, it doesn't take away from anything men have accomplished as a whole, or you as an individual. Simply recognizing that women have a harder path in some aspects, and appreciating their journey makes no reflection on your efforts or those of your fellow man.

It is not only okay for a capable and competent man to be an advocate for the women around him, but it is also a requirement. Any person of character should not be threatened by the recent advancements of women.

3. It is okay to be masculine.

It is okay to watch football and drink beer. It is okay to be really into your car. It is okay to have masculine hobbies and do masculine things with your male companions. Don't let the first few paragraphs of this article make you feel otherwise. You have every right to spend your time with whoever and doing whatever it is that you enjoy. Countless men out there just do not enjoy getting in touch with their emotions. You don't have to. Just because you are free from the constraints of compulsory societal masculinity, doesn't mean you have to abstain from it. You can have a bunch of friends you just get drunk with and play video games if that is the life you want to lead, go for it!

4. We have to police ourselves.

For far too long good men have turned a blind eye to the behavior of their male peers. We have all at some point known someone who has put a woman in a situation in which she feels uncomfortable at the very least. We have seen it time and time again that men in positions to do something about the treatment of the women around them have failed to do so. Collectively, men need to get over any fear we may have of angering the status quo or upsetting the norm. No one worth your time will ever fault you for sticking up for women's issues.

Much has changed about the role of men in recent years. None of it should surprise or upset us. We should realize that we always have a place in society. We will always be wanted and needed. Recent advances in gender equality are not a threat to that. If anything we can be what it is we want to be, with less pressure from society. It is a good time to be a male. Enjoy it.


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