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Cancer: the pain,the hopes and dreams of a family

Updated on May 28, 2013

The background of a family

It was a happy family with the usual ups and downs as each normal family has.Father and mother of two children and the wife of the older son living in same house.The father was in train business as an electrician,mother in postal office as manage , youngest son at high school ,older one at home and his wife a hotel receptioner.

The beginning of the end

It was autumn last year.In my family i was the person that had the most free time and my brother was the one who worked along my father in his projects: construction,pluming,electricity.I was most of the time at PC playing a game or watching a movie.I was happy,every thing was almost OK and and only few fights with my parents about changing my each day schedule was the biggest concern.At the end of November all started to change,and only now I realize how much a family life can change on matter of weeks or months.My father started to feel different,tired and some time a little hard to breath.My mother who always had medicine when it was needed given him something for cold and the waited theweekend to pass to go to a doctor.Monday they went and there the doctor told them that is a severe cold and it only needs a minor treatment and all will be ok.From that day on everything changed for us

The true and doctors mistake

The month of December it was the month when the happiness was stolen away from us.Only now we realize that if in that time we knew the situation,all of this might not happen.After few weeks of taking the treatment that the doctor prescribed,we realized that it has no effect on my father.We went again at a doctor( a second one) and all she said it was that he must continue with the treatment and every thing will be ok.She didn't do even an x-ray or anything else.January started and my father wasn't better at all.He felt worse and worse until in 8 January we went to the second doctor and demand him to make an x-ray or something to see what my father has.After we didn't take a no for an answer she did a scan and saw that my father has whether in his lungs and told us to go as fast as possible and a specialized hospital found in a nearby city.The next day My father and my mother went and put him in hospital.A week passed and there they did all kind of tests ,and told my father to call my mother and family so we all could be there when the results come.I will never forget that day.The day when all happiness was crushed and when everything will not be the same.The doctor entered the room and told us that my father has water and infection in his lungs and we must transfer to an oncology department for his treatment.When I heard that I ran out of the room because I knew it: my father has lung cancer.After few seconds my mother followed me and told me to get in the room to be with my father, and I went with her.the look in my father eyes,the forced smile of my mother for my father to know that all will be OK and my tears trying to rush out,the feeling of hope disappearing...The Doctor there told us that if the other doctors didn't waited so much and do the usual test this situation could be prevented.My father not only that had lung cancer but also water and infection because of the malpractice of the 2 doctors

Life and death moments

That day when I left the hospital after my family founded out that my father has cancer was the last day until now when I saw my father walking by himself.After a week my mother and my uncle,went with my father at one of the most important hospitals in my country and hospitalized him.On the way there my father almost died because of a heart atackk.His hart was weakened because of the cancer and the road to the hospital was long.After they got there the doctors did again all test they could do and gived him a treatment to improve his condition so he could start chemotherapy.In first day they told my mother that he has only 4-5 days to live.He survived.God was watching him.I don't know how,but I think my fathers will to live was stronger than the cancer.After a week or two( I can't remember well) of treatment they send them to a hospital near home so the doctors could start chemotherapy.

No water, no food

After he started chemotherapy he lost a lot of weight,all hair and could be left alone.He needed always someone near him to feed him,change him of help turn in the bed.In 4 months only two weeks he was home.Rest of the time was in hospital with my mother beside him.Fist time when he was send home ,he stayed for days.In the sixth day we noticed that he couldn't eat or drink anything and the next day we went with ambulance at hospital to see what he has.There for 3 weeks,doctor kept him only on perfusion and medicine.None of them bothered to take a test or ask himself why my father couldn't swallow anything.Only after 3 weeks they managed to find out that because of the tumor the way to the stomach was strangulated and he needs a tube from his neck to his stomach,or the radical way to make a hole in his neck and eat all his remaining life with a tube.They send him to another hospital to take the procedure and help him eat and drink again.Thanks god that it worked and it wasn't necessary to make the hole in his neck.Before he went in the surgery my father prayed to could eat a piece of bread and drink a glass of water again... the only thing he wants.After 2 weeks he had again problems swallowing so when he went to doctor again he finded out that the tumor pushed and strangulated his tube and it was necessary a intervention with laser to clean the area so this problem will go away.They also told him that it might be necessary for a second time and all depends on the tumor

The pain,the hopes and the dreams

Today I look at my father and I regret the man I was.He always told me something like this:"Boy, stay near me and learn.Learn how to change a light bulb, change a tile on the roof because will come the day when im not around or im gone from this world and maybe nobody is there to help you".I never knew until this day how true is what he said.He taught me to be modest and respect each person because that is the only way you can succeed in life.From him I learned that if u do good things u get good things,if u do bad things u get bad things.The hardest thing I do each day is to look in his eyes and smile and tell him that every thing will be OK when he believes that he will been good health again,and I know that he doesn't have much to live.I lie so he could not lose hope and fight as much as he can to be around us.I dream many times with my eyes open that I go ,touch him and cancer will go again and we will laugh and be happy ahain.Its a dream,but is something I hang on too.Me,my wife brother and mother we just hope that each day he is around us,is a day when we can make him smile and ask him advice.Never forget:each one of us have a life but that life is because of our parents and we shall never forget that

My parents made all this posible


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    • metalxx profile imageAUTHOR

      Ienciu Alex 

      5 years ago from Romania

      Thx again for your kind words .I will enjoy each moment as if is my last one

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 

      5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      The best thing you could do for your dad is what you are already by his side and support him. You can't undo what's been done. Enjoy each moment the best you can with your family.

    • metalxx profile imageAUTHOR

      Ienciu Alex 

      5 years ago from Romania

      every time i think about the situation,i ask myself: why him?if i only could go back in time to change all....i wish i had the power to take his pain and disease on me.Because of him and my mother i am the man and the husband i am today .thank your for your wish and i hope with all my heart ,even if my brain tells me another thing

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 

      5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      It's a shame that doctors were so careless with your dad's treatment. We have doctors like those in the USA also. Clueless. I wish your dad the best with his treatment and I hope he kicks cancer to the curb.

      Welcome to HubPages!


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