Changing Your Life And Everyone In It
A brief intro to changing your life
Changing your life is a monumental task. There are so many things that we would like to change, but change requires stepping out of our comfort zones and into areas unknown.
Wouldn't it be great if we could find a simple road map to changing our life that doesn't require quite as much stress and confusion on our part? Well, we can, and I know because I've followed the advice of Michelle Weiner-Davis for nearly five years now.
Michelle is the author of several books including the popular Divorce Busting program. What she really specializes in is teaching the average person how to change their life and everyone in it in a fairly painless method.
Her methods are so simple I've not only used them with my children, but I've taught them to use them in their life as well. It has worked so well, that when I get frustrated with a certain situation in my life, my kids say...
"Mom, you are focusing on the problem, not the solution!"
It works on husbands, bosses, friends, and even pets once you understand it. If you only read one self help book in your entire life, this should be the one. I promise you will not regret it!
Doing the same things over and over expecting different results
If you really think about it I'll bet you can think of several things that have had fairly consistent results in your life, am I right?
Chances are that there are some pretty predictable outcomes.
Let's face it, what you have been doing in your life hasn't always worked very well in the past, yet you keep trying to do it the same way.
Now, look at our little rat friend here. Rats are fairly smart animals, that's why they are used in so many experiments. The scientist sets the cheese in the maze, then turns the rat loose. The rat searches tunnel number one, tunnel number two, tunnel number three, and finally finds it in tunnel number four.
If they keep placing the cheese in tunnel number four, eventually the rat is going to understand this and start going directly to the forth tunnel and ignore the other three.
Now, what happens if they move the cheese to tunnel number one? The rat looks around for awhile and begins exploring the other tunnels, eventually he finds the cheese and all is well again.
That's what happens in life, we figure out what works and we keep doing it. Then one day it stops working, and instead of looking for a new way to approach it, we humans keep trying the same things.
We keep forcing it, just knowing if it worked at one time it is bound to work again if we just try hard enough.
Humans may be smarter than rats, but they are also far more stubborn.
So what can we learn from the rats?
Stop doing the same things over and over expecting different results.
Seeing things in a different light
One of the concepts taught by Michelle Weiner-Davis is the most simple, yet the most powerful trick anyone who is serious about changing their life could ever need.
If your life isn't working the way you would like it to, you are probably trying to control the outside forces involved. That has led to frustration after frustration in the past, but like the stubborn creatures we are, you keep doing it...
A new frame can change the look of a painting, and it can change your life. Instead of looking at the negatives, strive to find the positives. Make sure you aren't setting negative goals in your head, but word them in a positive way.
Instead of promising yourself that you will scream the next time someone with that annoying habit gets on your nerves, promise yourself you will notice when they don't do it, and compliment them.
It isn't hard to find something when we are looking for it, it's usually what we are looking for that causes most of our frustration in life.
Change your perspective from the negative to the positive and see what happens!
These are just a few of the tricks Ms. Davis will teach you in her programs. She has quite a few to choose from, changing your life, to changing your marriage, even saving a marriage when one partner is no longer interested.
In case you haven't figured out the trick to her lessons, though I've shared some of it here, I will share one more secret with you. The leading cause of frustration in most peoples lives comes from trying to control outside sources.
She teaches you to turn that focus inward and focus on changing yourself and how you react to people and situations.
It really does work, and I am living proof. Ms. Davis not only saved my marriage, but changed my whole life and she can do the same for you!