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City Of My Soul, When Life Changes Us.

Updated on July 8, 2015

Waking Up In The City

Do I leave this land? Really feet like our time for traveling has begun. Yes, sometimes, almost, go ahead.

We love to dream of signing on that dotted line for that trip to Mars. There, certainly we'd be far enough away for it, whatever it is, to stop hurting so intensely like this. We don't know what it is. We don't know how to describe it.

Found out real quick, wasn’t neither the place...Or the people or the man, or the love, a four letter word that has no meaning to us.

Where we feel all the feelings, yet, we have been told, there is none. Only we seem to be burdened with them.

"No one in this world should ever know." "No one?" "Trust no one." "No reason to cry."

Then we must say goodbye. We wander around, then lay down. When we awake we find a blanket over our cold legs and an extended hand with a hot cup of coffee in it. Nothing ever tasted so good, and in that moment, without words, we felt understood.

We Are Meant to Be Here

People of the streets know how to live, we know where to go. "We've got deep love in our soul, we don’t really want a hand out, yeah, yeah, we just love to sing, dance and shout.

Come along with us, we will help you feel safe downtown. We will tell ya all about the latest thing there is to do, go round."

"Okay then, lets go downtown, shake that body like I know ya could, come on baby dance real good."

Such wonderful dance places, makes us scream and shout. Twist around with the Prince, we have never known such freedom as this.

We live in a world of no mistakes. Someday it will all make sense. Depression screams we win, joy says we've just begun to live, get out of our way.

So they say, it is hard to understand while sitting in a park, letting our minds follow the winds; coasting on the air like the gulls. Lulls the pain, let it rain. Walk back up the hill, the sun comes up again.

So Are You

Little baby in my womb, thank you for being there, I think I would have made much different choices if you weren’t the answer to my prayer.

That everything was going to be alright, as again we walked the Evergreen streets at night, while strangers, now friends, held me tight.

"Shh, shh, it will be alright. We are here for you, we hear your pain, we hold you near, come talk with us, be not afraid."

The babies grew, men were new, we began to trust a few. Alone every night, still the rule. Questioning what do we need to do with our lives? Are we crazy? How do we find out? Asking our friends at the park benches. We look high and low, is there love and light left for us, or will we forever just be a wandering in the city lights of Evergreen? Do we even dare to know such things?

The children hold our hearts, peace be still, we love the people who show us how to take care of them.

Soul City

In the park of life changes.
In the park of life changes. | Source
Every time we look up to the sky and remember why.
Every time we look up to the sky and remember why. | Source

Soul Gifts

Yet, no man our heart can be given, as again, it turned into a blood red sky, full of black and white, not a way to live.

All around us, little ones looking up to us saying hi, we'd look up with them and realize, oh yes, seeing the clouds and birds in the sky is marvelous.

Puts a smile on everyone's face and truly a twinkle in their exploring little eyes. I never again want to let go of that bliss. We will survive, we have friends now to help us. Friends who took us in and fed us, kept us warm, taught us how to get a job. Showed us how independent we are, how strong, how kind.

To join the crusade building a momentum to the hurry, scurry music of the work day. I found out I was thankful. I got to just listen and watch for awhile. Alone in a room, while the rest of the household left for their school and work. I got to learn how to like being by myself.

I enjoyed the house to myself then, getting ready for a new day of changing, discovering. Building a more secure, happier, healthier life for myself and my children. Whatever that means, whatever I believe in, that's what they were saying, it is what I am believing. All these gifts of loving communication are mine for the receiving.

Life Changes

To find a life, a man, a world of love unconditionally. A love of deep devotion, a love, true and free, a love for all eternity. A love from Evergreen, the city, no, not this time.
The rural boy came round. For a couple of years it was touch and go as I got to know my soul and what was right for me.

Meeting you in the dark, talking in the park, listening to all the words of others pain and sorrow. Hoping, wishing, waiting, for my happy tomorrow. For a way out of this mess. Yet, there was contentment and happiness on these cold city streets. I wandered back and forth night and day. To work , then play with the kids, back to a warm stove at night, peace and quiet. Phone calls to boys who wanted to be my friends, companions, yes and no, we are still a woman, a mother, a friend, a daughter and a sister. Some things never change, and yet, they do.

Soul Changes In This City

When we are feeling blue we know who to turn to, what to do, what to listen to, thank you, thank you.
When we are feeling blue we know who to turn to, what to do, what to listen to, thank you, thank you. | Source

© 2013 Maree Michael Martin

Changing Lives

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    • Nadine May profile image

      Nadine May 4 years ago from Cape Town, Western Cape, South Africa

      Interesting hub. I like the soul gift part. Nice.

    • sprickita profile image

      sprickita 4 years ago from Reno

      if uv got a little bun in over heck yeah there is light , buckle up tho cause may be a little bumpy getting to ur happy spot.. hope not tho , I hope and wish the best 4 any body but a broken heart is rush delivery...

    • Ruby H Rose profile image

      Maree Michael Martin 4 years ago from Northwest Washington on an Island

      Yes, a world like no other for sure, aviannovice. So enjoy your work. I learn so much about birds from you, now to go find that article….

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 4 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      This is similar to a piece I wrote about the homeless at Penn Station. Just to speak to the people is a world like no other, which they willing open. I felt graced by an entire new world.

    • Ruby H Rose profile image

      Maree Michael Martin 4 years ago from Northwest Washington on an Island

      Thanks Dee Nonna, glad you liked it.

    • Dee aka Nonna profile image

      Dee aka Nonna 4 years ago

      Ruby H Rose, I loved reading this article. So much spoke to me, but perhaps the line that literally jumped off the page was "is there love and light left for me." I, personally, wonder that in it various forms of thinking or saying it. Thank you for sharing this.