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Confidence is Sexy and How to Increase It

Updated on September 20, 2019

What is sexy about a person?

Is it their physical appearance? If it was their physical appearance, then how would you feel about dating a hot chick or a sexy hunk if they liked to steal from people. Most people wouldn’t like to date someone who lies, cheats, or steals. Now, would you like to date a physically attractive person who constantly complained about their insecurities which required you to constantly berate them with glamorous adjectives? I think people are sexy not because of their looks, but because of how confident they are. People who could be sexy, but don’t look it often have confidence issues. Once their confidence rises, their self-image also improves, and they can then take more chances with how they look.

So, what is a confident person?

People are biologically skin, muscles, bone, and fiber, ultimately a hodgepodge of cells. But their brain and ability to think about their actions and control their environment makes people very special. It is the brain that ultimately makes a person sexy. The choices people have available are generated by the brain and when chosen correctly can lead to a confident person.

A confident person is someone who feels content. So, what makes a person content? A content person is happy with who they are and how they feel about the world around them. Remember how I said the brain allows people to think about their actions and control their environment. A content person is constantly in agreement with their everyday choices. They choose actions that make them feel good about themselves. They choose to exercise and eat a healthy diet, but also agree that those choices are what they want for their body. It is commonly understood that diet and exercise is good for people and may make them feel good, but it is often hard for people to put into practice.

The disconnect.

I think people are often quite disconnected with their life. They often do not like too many of the choices they make and the mindset they are in is dragging them down. If you looked at your life and what you do with it would you say you enjoy your environment? Each person’s environment consists of their home, their place of work, a car, the yard, raising children, and even their own body. Like I mentioned before, people are amazing because they can change their environment. So, what do we have to do to become reconnected, feel content, and exhibit sexy confidence?

Well I would say quit doing whatever choices negatively impact you, but people also need time to adjust. What I would do is find whatever was bogging me down the most, probably something big like my job and then begin looking for a new one. Sometimes there are more steps that need to be taken to do this. If you are in the wrong field, you may need to go back to a school to get a certification to get to your dream job. If you honestly have no clue as to what you want to do, but hate your job anyway, then start volunteering. Volunteering is a great way to experience what other people do. Maybe ask friends and family about their jobs and if they captivate you with their stories investigate those jobs. If you don’t happen to have a job and that causes a lot of negative feelings for you then get a job. If you either can’t seem to get a job or don’t feel confident enough to apply, then try volunteering. Volunteering can offer new skills, letters of recommendation, and maybe even a job. Something like volunteering are internships, which can be paid or unpaid, but the goal is to get your foot in the door and find the job that you are happy to wake up for every morning.

The reason why I say start with your job, is because your job often takes a large part of your life (almost ¼ of the week if you work a 40 hr work week). When you hate something that takes so much of your life you are going to resent it and when you resent things you will start to hate yourself. Alternatively, if you love your job or don’t have a job. Begin with the next thing that takes up a lot of your time and start addressing that.

Once you take the time to transform a large negative experience into a positive one, you should feel better. You should be able to think, “I love my life a little more.” And if you can say that then you will probably begin to voluntarily start changing your life. The disconnect is now undone, because before you might have said it doesn’t matter my life sucks anyway, but now you say it does matter I want to be better and feel better. Keeping a negative job destroys our ability to do the little positive things like exercise, dieting, cleaning a room, or making homemade meals. While under the negativity one might be able to convince themselves to exercise one day and then lose the gusto to do it again. This is because exercising will make you feel good and remove stress, but you are trying to treat a symptom of the negativity and not the negativity itself. Let us all nip the negativity in our lives at the source!

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2019 C L Whisper


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