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Dealing with an alcoholic spouse

Updated on September 17, 2015


An alcoholic wife is a big blow in family relationship. One of the many things alcoholism could take way from her relationship could be her ability to communicate honestly and directly. It could be one of the most difficult things the husband could ever encounter in his relationship. His wife’s alcoholism could be the largest cause of relationship anger, hurt or even other unpleasantries as a result of break down in the intermarital communication. For the drinking wife, there might be certain issues that might have fueled her desires to assume her alcoholic lifestyle. It might not be advisable to judge her harshly. It might be that such realities were hidden from her in her growing ages by her family. Otherwise, her alcoholic state also affects. You are probably suffering from alcoholism. This is because alcoholism is usually a “family disease”. Dealing with your wife’s alcoholism will always require you to develop some ways that will often conflict with your happiness. Consequently, such things as fear, despair and even hopelessness, will always cloud you and will always translate to your “sickness”. Other husbands in relationships may sometimes think, “It’s my fault”. The wife may be into alcoholism because she doesn’t know how to stop it. Dealing with such a wife may sometimes be difficult or may require some specific efforts. The different types of advices bare some sort of diversity, acknowledging the fact that it is not likely that “one size will always fit all”.

Seek professional support

If you are living with an alcoholic wife, it is probable that you have realized that confronting her about the alcoholism will rarely amount to any substantial solutions. It might also do some harm in trying to acknowledge the situation. Otherwise, it is a disease that needs a timely intervention. During such times, the wife might be experiencing emotional challenges such as fright, shame or even psychological confusion which could be eating her up. Therefore, dealing with your alcoholic wife could mean seeking certain ways of reaching for recovery. Here, you could also consider recruiting the services of a rehabilitation center. In such rehabilitation points you are also likely to meet friends and family dealing with family members’ alcoholism or something similar. These points will more likely offer relevant treatments and recovery processes for the alcoholism.

Apply acceptance

Learning to tolerate that you can’t really control your wife’s drinking habit could be one way of copping or rather dealing with your spouse’s drinking habit. Detaching oneself from the drinker and not doing the things that they should have done could sometimes awaken some sense of responsibility to the alcoholic wife. However, certain habits caused by alcohol could sometimes be hard to tolerate. For example, certain behaviors that include being abusive, violent and so on could sometimes become unbearable.

Do Nothing-Be supportive

Most of the rehabilitation centers do advice that, one does not have the powers to do or say something that will more likely make the other person to stop using alcohol. They attribute such acts as ways of adding to the family’s stress loads. Research suggests that family stress and a certain degree of dependence on the alcohol could be reduced, if the family declined from attempting to concentrate their efforts on the alcoholic member of their families, and families should get on with their lives. The research suggests that the partner could go ahead and seek support for him/herself. Self-help groups, family support, community based services, counseling services among others could be one way to find support.


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