ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Depression: Support and Recovery

Updated on March 13, 2016

Hurting and Healing: An Open Letter on Depression and Recovery

I know I haven't been myself lately.

I'm writing this letter because, for some reason, my voice has failed me. The ability to say what I have been struggling with- to truly speak- is missing.

I have depression.

This is blunt, I know. You may even wonder if what I write is true. I understand. I don't always understand it myself.

Depression is an illness, just like any physical condition. I can't apologize for that. What is most painful, though, is how this illness has affected those around me. For that, I am sorry.

The best way I can describe having depression is this: imagine you are behind a glass wall. The people in your life are on the other side. You can hear each other, see each other, and talk to one another. Sometimes, you might think the wall isn't there, until the day ends and everyone begins to walk away from the wall. You try to follow them, only to hit glass. You're frustrated. You put your hands to the wall. Nothing. Everyone is gone.

I realize I put this wall up myself. For that, I am sorry. This wall, this depression, has hurt all of you. You do not deserve the frustration it has caused you. I know I may be distant sometimes, or act a bit strange. It can be uncomfortable and overwhelming. I'm working on it every day.

Many of you have gone out of your way to help me. Your kindness, your words and gestures, have stayed with me. I may have acted as though I did not appreciate or understand the help you have offered me, but that is far from the truth. I am so very grateful for it all.

I don't know why my mind works the way it does. I doubt I ever will. Sometimes, I get a bit lost. I know this may sound selfish, but, some days, I wish for a hug, or for someone to tell me that everything will be okay

If there is anything I want you to know, more than anything, it’s that I will get through the tough days. I will try, as much as I can, to silence depression. I will try to be the friend you need. I will take that wall down.

I hope you will be there when I do.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 

      2 years ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      Depression is tough. I have fought with it for the past twenty five years. There are days when I stay behind the wall for protection. I don't want to get hurt, and it keeps me from feeling the pain. Then there are days when the wall is gone, and I go about my activities with renewed peace and understanding. I relish those days. Loneliness is a big part of the depression. I don't have close friends, or at least, I don't develop them for fear that I will let them down. When people start to get close to me, I put distance between us and find excuses not to see them. That way, I won't disappoint them or get hurt by them.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)