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Forgiveness Heals - Young Man Forgives Criminals

Updated on May 7, 2015
brakel2 profile image

Helping others through her research and writing meets an important goal for Audrey. She has spent many hours on this goal in her career.

Forgiveness Heals

"When a deep injury is done to us, we never recover until we forgive" says Alan Patton, a South African writer. Forgiving a person releases a burden to allow peace and to heal mind and body, following a transgression or crime. Why forgive?, If we do not forgive, the hurt remains in your mind and eats at you until sometimes it becomes so magnified that it is far from the original misdeed. You will learn about barriers to forgiveness, a story about a man who forgave criminals who killed family members, forgiveness in friendships, and the release that forgiveness allows you in cleansing your spirit.

The words "Love".
The words "Love".

Barriers to Forgiveness

The ability to forgive varies, depending on your own self-esteem, personality, and degree of the transgression. Forgiving ones self must happen before a person can forgive another. Forgiveness for a crime may be the most difficult for anyone to forgive. A person who lacks a support group may never find a reason to forgive, as that person has no place to express feelings. The victim may dwell on the transgression and never think about forgiveness. A person surrounded by others can bounce the situation off these people and may forgive and move on, unless it is a serious transgression., A highly sensitive person may have the perception of a misdeed when, in reality, none exists. The individual who does not forgive may suffer in body and mind with feelings of anger, depression, panic attacks, and physical illness. The person who is so involved in hurt, often destroys his own life, never realizing the achievement he could attain through freedom from pain. It takes courage to forgive someone, and then freedom reigns.The following examples show the power of forgiveness.

Man Forgives a Criminal

A young man in Oklahoma City forgave the criminal who murdered his wife after the criminal wrote to apologize for his drug-induced crime. He later presented a speech about the freedom it gave him to move on with his life and remarry. Forgiveness does not mean that he or anyone else condones what a person has done. In a huge catastrophe, it would be difficult to condone misdeeds.

Young Couple In Love
Young Couple In Love | Source

Another Crime Forgiveness

Young Man Forgives Criminals Who Killed His Parents

A young man finally forgave the criminals who killed his parents. The crime was horrendous and of such a nature that it would be very difficult to forgive the perpetrators. However, this man suffered severely, his life, his marriage; other relationships crumbled so that his life took a path of ruination. Many years later, he decided to forgive, so he could heal and get his life back. He did heal, turning away from the bitterness and hatred, and with passage of time, landed on his feet. Imagine a windstorm swirling him around without allowing him to land. When he tried to land, he could never reach the ground until forgiveness was within his grasp. Forgiving does not mean forgetting, but the memory eventually may creep from the deepest part of thinking into an area where a glimmer of light prevails.

Stock Market Catastrophies

The stock market and mortgage industry catastrophes in 2008 brought pain and financial ruin to millions of people, and thousands of people postponed retirement. Peace of mind disappeared, and the masses leaned on other for support and comfort. Criminal behavior sent people to jail, stress consumed society and suicide became widespread. The minds of the victims became overloaded due to the severity of these misdeeds, along with any additional burdens in their personal lives. At the time, the future looked bleak. Can recovery, freedom, and forgiveness actually happen with such a breakdown in society?

Forgiveness and Freedom

Forgiveness and freedom are possible in all circumstances. It may take a long time, as people cautiously move on from catastrophes, taking time to excuse others for faults. Mankind is resilient , a fact that brings hope that suffering can decrease over time in our society, and victims of misdeeds can more quickly find a light in the darkness to release them from their chains, bring them love, the ability to forgive others, and finally, freedom from pain.

A Couple Argues
A Couple Argues
A Couple Forgives
A Couple Forgives

Friendships and Forgiveness.

The end of a friendship for one reason or another could be another situation that might require forgiveness. Some friendships last for a little while, and other friendships last for a lifetime. The reason friendships end is often never known. Individuals may be devastated by the occurrence, and only the passage of time can help the situation. The lifetime friendship is a cherished relationship, and the friendship that ends can be appreciated for the time it lasted. Once again, the person may need to forgive and heal the body and mind to avoid the trap of anger, bitterness, and physical illness.


Dr Gerald Jampolsky, author and psychiatrist, was a member of a panel discussion on where he spoke of asking yourself what the value is of not forgiving and the importance of taking responsibility for your own happiness.. Not forgiving is like putting yourself in prison. In the meantime, the offender may may go on with his life, never thinking of the event, while the victim remains prisoner of the transgression. Is it worth it? Everyone must make a choice, and the choices are happiness or being swirled in a windstorm, never reaching the ground. Alan Patton says we never recover until we forgive. Love. at some point, enters the picture. Finally. the windstorm stops and forgiveness heals mind and body.

Audrey Selig

copyright 2011

Poll About Forgiveness

Did you ever forgive someone, and the action gave you pride?

See results

Forgiveness Video with Vivid Photography


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    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 2 years ago

      brakel2, I will , occasionally I grow frustrated with writing and become a bit selfish , Thank you for that !

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 2 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Hi I know how hard it is to forgive, especially if with a bad experience that hits hard. Like you, we just keep on trying. Thanks so much for stopping by to read. It is sometimes hard for me to take my own advice in my hubs, but I try like we all do. That is all we can do. I hope you stay at the site. Blessings, Audrey

    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 2 years ago

      I have to admit , I'm having trouble with forgiveness , Perhaps it's because of my reluctance to accept Gods words , or the very nature of the crimes themselves . I do believe that our culture is in a state of acceptance of any , many wrongs that are dealt us , which is probably good . But is it not simply "letting it go " for the sake of some immediate euphoric mental pleasure , as if , if we just ignore the pain of loss that we somehow win , that it goes away somewhere ? You have many great hubs here and I don't mean to take away from most peoples acceptance of your great advice , but darn it can be tough although I'm trying . Thank you for writing this great advice . ........Ed

    • DREAM ON profile image

      DREAM ON 2 years ago

      Another hub that deals with real life and how we can change for the better. Because of my "I live and let live philosophy I do my best to forgive." Those people that do great harm to innocent people disturb me so much it makes me sick to my stomach. The only way I can cope is focus on helping in some way the people hurt or suffering and write every thought I think before my fingers go numb from pain in my wrist and arm from writings too much. Thank you reminding me and opening my eyes to different views. Have a happy night.

    • Alphadogg16 profile image

      Kevin W 4 years ago from Texas

      Very interesting hub brakel2, I personally have always had problems with forgiveness. Not an easy task for some people. Thumbs up on your hub.

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Easier said than done yet we all have to let go and letting go comes with forgiveness and then we move on.

      Good, enlightening hub. Voting up, pinning and sharing.

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 5 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Hi Gary I love it when you send me peace and light and purple butterflies. Purple is a favorite color. Someone suggested I write about eternal optimism in a very imperfect world. Anyway, I love commenting on your articles. This hub about forgiveness touches on the young man who dealt with criminals who killed his parents. His father was a minister. It is a sad story, but his forgiveness is the good part. Thanks for reading it and commenting. Till we meet again. Audrey

    • qlcoach profile image

      Gary Eby 5 years ago from Cave Junction, Oregon

      Nice work here. If we seek healing and emotional recovery, we must let go of all painful emotions. I appreciate your comments on my Hubs about trauma and positive beliefs. Sending you purple butterflies today. Namaste...Gary.

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 6 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Hi Gary We do have a lot in common. I love to find people on this site that I can relate to in some way or other. I love the blue fox story in your HP question. I never knew they existed. On the subject of forgiveness, thanks for reading my hub. You are right about forgiving yourself. I have been guilty of beating up on myself, but that moment quickly passes. Thanks for adding that comment to my hub. Good luck with your writing amd your current activities.

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 6 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Hi Luxmi - Your comments and your evaluation of the power of forgiveness is so deep found. Sometimes it is so difficult to forgive, as we come across people in our lives who are unkind. You need a thick skin in today's world. Forgiveness of a criminal is impossible to imagine. However, anything is possible. You are a good writer, and I will look for your hubs.

    • qlcoach profile image

      Gary Eby 6 years ago from Cave Junction, Oregon

      Yes to the process and healing power of forgiveness! Excellent Hub and great writing. Thank you so much for the fan mail and for sharing a "blue fox" moment. Looks like we have much in common. One thought to ponder: Sometimes we need to forgive ourselves first for self-inflicted pain and negative choices; then it's easier to forgive others. Peace and Light...Gary

    • LuxmiH profile image

      Luxmih Eve-Lyn Forbes 6 years ago from Fort Pierce, Florida

      Thanks for helping shining the light on the power of forgiveness.

      it has been my experience that when we hold on to resentment and pain, all we are doing is creating for ourselves a greater a burden, a lower vibration that keeps us in a frequency that attracts more unpleasant experiences.

      One of my teachers, (Abraham-Hicks), says that anything we experience comes to us because we attracted it to ourselves through our thoughts and feelings, our personal vibration frequency. I know that this is a bitter pill for some 'victims' to swallow.

      Having personally attracted many experiences that would most certainly qualify me as a 'victim', I feel more powerful by knowing that as I release negative feelings, I lift up my energy and attract a happier healthier life. Which is exactly what forgiveness does. Bravo for this Hub.

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 6 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Thanks for reading my hub and for your kind words. Forgiveness is so powerful and takes courage I will look for your hubs Happy writing Neakin

    • neakin profile image

      neakin 6 years ago

      Awesome Hub! I look forward to reading many more!

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 6 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Hi Boomernurse - Thank you for reading my hub. I have written several articles on forgiveness and believe in its power. In addition, I gave a speech on the subject. I have known several people whose lives were almost ruined before they forgave. Your profile interests me, and you have had much experience in your field.I can't wait to read your hubs and appreciate your interest in my hub.

    • Happyboomernurse profile image

      Gail Sobotkin 6 years ago from South Carolina

      Great hub about forgiveness. I agree with what you said, especially when you compared not forgiving to putting youself in prison while the offender may go on with his life rarely, if ever giving the offense a second thought.

      Forgiveness is hard, but I believe it is the route to true healing.

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 7 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      Hi Beberlee - Thank you for reading my hub. I hope you enjoyed it. Maybe you never had anyone do anything serious enough to forgive them. That would be great. I enjoy reading your hubs. I enjoy your comments on mine.

    • Beberlee profile image

      Beverly 7 years ago from Philadelphia

      I have a hard tome forgiving people but what i do is let it go and try to forget about it.