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Farting: It's Only Natural

Updated on June 6, 2016
DzyMsLizzy profile image

An amateur comedienne, Liz loves humor & practical jokes, so Oct.31 and Apr.1st are her favorite days all year. Let the laughter begin! :-D

Is farting crude, rude and socially unacceptable, or just nature?

We cover our mouths with our hands when we burp.  Why don't we cover our behinds when we fart?
We cover our mouths with our hands when we burp. Why don't we cover our behinds when we fart? | Source

What are Farts?

I wrote this article in reply to the question, "Do you and your spouse fart in each other's presence?" posed by Poetic Failosophy in the Q & A Section.

Farting, or passing gas, technically known as flatulence, is normal, and all animals are "guilty." All mammals, anyway; I don't know about bugs or fish.

People generally do this about 15-20 or more times a day, depending on diet. Because of cultural influences, it has been relegated to the category of things known as "embarrassing."

The cause is gas produced by various bacteria in the gut working upon the foods we eat. Depending on the food and the type of bacteria, there may or may not be an associated odor with the release of this gas.

That is the answer my mother might have given me, had she not been too busy laughing herself silly the night I came piling out of bed at around eight years of age, demanding to know, "Mother, exactly what is a fart composed of?"

What to Call the Thing?

In addition to its technical medical terminology of flatus, there are innumerable vernacular expressions used to speak of the act, without naming it directly. Below are just a few of the many, many references to this one bodily function.

passing gas
barking spider
air biscuit
trouser cough
anal acoustics
butt trumpet
let one rip
cut the cheese
break wind
toot
poot
stinker

Squelch the Thing?

However to address the question: if a married couple has a true partnership, are married for the right reasons, and not shallow ones, there should be no problem with this happening in each other's presence.

That said, it is usually considered "polite" to exercise the muscles to minimize the sound--especially in public. Unfortunately, this is not always possible. There are situations we've all encountered when it is impossible to exercise two separate muscle groups at the same time; hence we have an assorted variety of sounds from these contrary activities:

  • The bending-over ripper
  • The walking squeaker
  • The squatting gasser
  • The sneezing explosion
  • The coughing tooter

There was a saying that came from my mother's side of the family, and it applied to the burp, or belch, not the fart. I maintain that the same sentiment applies exactly to flatulence:

"Better to belch and bear the shame than squelch the belch and bear the pain."

Meaning, of course, that trapped gas is very liable to cause a gut-ache. And no one likes gas cramps.

Also, as we age, control over certain muscles may weaken, and make squelching or controlling the noise nearly impossible.

Successfully silencing the odorous monster,however, can result in the "SBD" variety...(Silent But Deadly)...which can have you racing for the next aisle in the store in a rather large hurry, or hoping that you remain alone in the elevator until you reach your floor.

And to my knowledge, no one has yet invented charcoal-filter underwear.

A True Story? I'm Not Sure.

I heard this tale years ago. Take it as you will. I take it as humor.

There was a dinner party, to which a rather socially awkward fellow was invited. The seating was formal; man, woman, man, woman, man woman, etc. around the table.

The unfortunate woman next to him was troubled with gas, and every time a flatus escaped her, the man on her other side, chivalrously took the blame, saying, "Oh, excuse me," or "I beg your pardon."

The rube finally caught on to what was happening, and, missing the entire point, the next time, raised his arm and loudly called out, "This one's on me!"

What to Say?

Common courtesy demands, in public at least, to offer an "Excuse me," if you have offered up such a gem, especially of the unavoidably noisy type. Then again, if you are at a sporting event, it might just be mistaken for a "Bronx Cheer" against the opposing team.

Commenting on someone else's contribution, however, is liable to turn the tables on you, with a comeback such as, "The one who smelt it, dealt it." Or, "The hen that cackles is the one who laid the egg."

Being the sneaky Pete who exudes one of the "SBD" variety, then frowns at, and moves away from another person, thereby silently laying the blame elsewhere, is just plain not nice.

The Mythbusters Explore the Phenomenon

The Flatulence Tally

Do you allow a fart to escape in front of your significant other?

See results

The Marriage Question

This may be a generational thing. People past a certain age might well consider this event to be deadly embarrassing, even in the presence of one's own spouse.

The next generation might stifle a chagrined giggle.

But watch out for the generations after that! They are liable to devolve into outright contests!

*toot*

"Oh, yeah? Well take that!" *Toot!*

"Is that the best you can offer?" *TOOT!*

"Well, let's see now--hand me that can of beans over there!" *TOOOOOOOTTTT!! TOOT*

"Maybe we'd better open a window."

Married people who know each other well, and are best friends, have learned to take life as it comes are not going to be overly embarrassed or offended because of a natural bodily function. They are in it, for better or worse, in health and in flatulence, 'till death do they part.

And let us hope that the law is not called in for death by gassing.

© 2013 Liz Elias

Comments

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  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 17 months ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi, there, peachpurple. Thanks very much for your input. It is interesting to note the different cultural responses. To be sure, I was writing from the perspective of the USA, and our culture, and I realize others may have a very different take on such functions.

    Just as there are some cultures, (unlike ours), in which a loud burp after a meal is considered a compliment to the cook; while here, it is considered rude, especially while still at the table.

    Thanks again for sharing your perspective.

  • peachpurple profile image

    peachy 17 months ago from Home Sweet Home

    Great hub

    My parents fart around the house as if nothing happens.

    It is our culture to fart with ignorance.

    We never say Excuse me or Bemused over it.

    It is just a casual thing that everyone does

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 17 months ago from Oakley, CA

    Thanks, Glen; I'm glad you enjoyed this, errrr...exploration into the phenomenon from which we all suffer as humans. I agree; it is silly to be embarrassed about such things in front of one's spouse.

  • Glenn Stok profile image

    Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY

    I think it's great that you had the courage to write about this Liz. It's such a natural phenomenon for us and most any living creature. And when two people live together they would be silly to try to avoid it in each others presence and suffer instead. That would just be so silly.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 2 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi, Rochelle!

    LOL So very true. My husband and I don't have the 'battles' of the kind I portrayed here, though there might be an occasional, "Oh, yeah? Well, back atcha!" LOL

    HOWever---in our house, the worst room-clearing offenders are--the CATS!!! Whew! Turn on the fans! Grab the air freshener! Quick!

    Thanks for your comment. I'm glad you enjoyed this silliness.

  • Rochelle Frank profile image

    Rochelle Frank 2 years ago from California Gold Country

    Just came across this.

    Experiencing the phenomenon while dating is the worst-- but I think you are not truly man and wife until you can share and mutually accept all natural physical occurrences with good humor and temporary room evacuation, if necessary.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 2 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hello, lbrummer, nice to meet you.

    I'm glad I was able to provide some chuckles for you! I'd never heard 'burning a cookie!' My turn to become educated to a new euphemism! LOL The 'silent but violent' is a slightly different turn of phrase of our 'silent but deadly,' I guess, and 'loud and proud' is another new one on me! Thanks for the education, and I'm delighted you enjoyed the article and everyone's stories that followed! I think this has been one of my most popular hubs!

  • lbrummer profile image

    Loraine Brummer 2 years ago from Hartington, Nebraska

    So funny. I didn't see anything about the "loud and proud" or "silent and violent" categories. How about "burning a cookie." I'm for any subject that entertains....and this was definitely entertaining. Including the stories in the comments.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hello, Elsie Hagley!

    Thank you so much. I'm delighted you enjoyed the article and found it thought-provoking. I appreciate the comment.

  • Elsie Hagley profile image

    Elsie Hagley 3 years ago from New Zealand

    Interesting subject. it gave me much food for thought.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    LOL, Jodah...

    And by the harsh light of day, that probably comes under "too much information," eh?

  • Jodah profile image

    John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

    Just came back and read wildove5's comment. Can't stop laughing, so funny...oops!

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    LOL thanks, but, you'll have to fill in the gap with your imagination; I'm not sure that story would pass HP or Google censors.. ;-)

  • wildove5 profile image

    wildove5 3 years ago from Cumberland, R.I.

    Ohhh,,A cliff hanger! I do love a cliff hanger! I'll be looking forward to your next hub on 'The Bedroom barking spider!' :)

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Ohmigosh, wildove5--that is hilarious. I'm sure it was deadly embarrassment at the time. I know the feeling. I tend to have a similar problem, as I'm now a grand old matriarch of 65 years. ;-)

    I, too, am nearly 10 years older than hubby, but we are both pretty laid back about the matter. I think the worst most embarrassing yet funny instance was once when we were first married, and "ahem," ... ... ...

  • wildove5 profile image

    wildove5 3 years ago from Cumberland, R.I.

    My husband and I are ten years apart in age, him being the youthful one. Apparently even though he is my junior, I am the one who giggles whenever I toot,,which usually leads to more tooting. (I'm approaching fifty this year and my muscular control down under is definitely a sure sign of my age.) While he gets totally embarrassed, I act like a teenage boy. In my youth I would have been mortified at 'letting one rip.' Actually one of my most embarrassing moments as a teenager was over a ' barking spider,' The scene; My boyfriend and I were bickering about who could do more sit-ups, I being super competitive challenged him to a contest. Lying on the kitchen floor, knees bent I assumed the position, still negotiating the terms of the contest I insisted we hold each others ankles to ensure we maintained proper sit-up form, Big mistake, HUGE. My boyfriend crouched down and clasped both of my ankles, his face inches from my knees. As we counted out loud together, 1,2,3, TOOOOTTT,,,,Mortified, I of course began to laugh, that was my second mistake. My original loud toot was followed with a chorus of trumpet toots. Needless to say my boyfriend let go of my feet and slid across the kitchen floor before being assaulted with an air biscuit! Looking back now it was hilarious, then, not so funny. I must thank you for this topic, I never understood all the fuss made over a natural bodily function. My family also had a saying for burping, 'Better to burp and taste it than to fart and waste it!" I think farting is way funnier, except at the dinner table or in your significant others face! Voted up, and very humorous!!

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    @ vocalcoach--Thank you so very much for your awesome comment. I'm delighted that you found my artwork worthy....I consider myself a kindergarten-level "artist." I'm also most pleased that I was able to provide your daily chuckle--or guffaw--as the case may be. I'm blushing from such praise!

    @ tillsontitan--Hi, Mary--I'm glad you enjoyed this. Yes, I tend to suffer from embarrassment--in public anyway. At home, hubby and I have learned to "get over it." Thanks ever so much for your comment ant the votes!

  • tillsontitan profile image

    Mary Craig 3 years ago from New York

    Well Lizzy, you've certainly hit on a subject that no one can deny. I love the way you handled it and the information you provided in the process. You're right, my generation suffers from total embarrassment.

    You did a great job and made this fun to read.

    Voted up, funny, and interesting.

  • vocalcoach profile image

    Audrey Hunt 3 years ago from Nashville Tn.

    My vocabulary has increased and my eyes are watering - from laughing. And I didn't realize you are an artist. I'm just crazy about your drawing!

    You are quite a lady - and one that I'm appreciating more and more!

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    @ Just Ask Susan--Hi there! No need to apologize--we all have lives outside of HP. I’m glad you got a chuckle out of this hub. I did try to tackle it in a way that would be neither offensive to the “Big G” censors, or overly-technical with medical lingo. I decided on humor as the best approach.

    I know what you mean about the room-clearing variety. We’ve probably all been guilty at one time or another, but the really bad ones come from a couple of our darling little cats! Thanks so very much for your comment, and I’m glad you like my pitiful attempt at art. ;-)

    @ Thief12--Glad to make your acquaintance. Thanks for stopping by, and I’m pleased that you enjoyed the article.

    @ fpherj48--yes, well, welcome to the zaniness inside my mind! ;-) Oh, yes, I do feel so loved. Thank you so much for the votes! I’m delighted you so enjoyed this piece.

  • fpherj48 profile image

    Paula 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

    Dzy....OMG.....I voted this UP and funny....VERY funny and the only other thing I can say is....You're absolutely right, "sometimes your mind just seems to wander, unsupervised." LOL WHAT are we gonna do with you besides love you?........UP+++

  • Thief12 profile image

    Thief12 3 years ago from Puerto Rico

    LOL, good hub. Funny and interesting.

  • Just Ask Susan profile image

    Susan Zutautas 3 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    First I have to apologize for not being around much. Second: Thank you for the laughs here :) This was pretty funny. But on a serious note .... when we first got married a life sentence plus one year ago I would have been appalled if my other half had of let one go in my presence. I'm kidding of course. When hubby cuts the cheese everyone leaves the room, animals included. I think once you've been married enough years everything becomes relaxing to do in front of each other.

    Love that drawing!

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hello, Sunshine.

    Yes, indeed--it cannot be helped. And yes, most of the time, you don't realize it...but there are "those times"..... Especially if you've eaten the "musical fruit," ... and emit a real room-clearing variety...the reaction will be, "Saying 'excuse me' doesn't help the smell!" (Sorry--should have stepped out the back door for that one...)

    Glad I was able to add a new descriptor to your arsenal. ;-) Thanks so much for the comment.

  • Sunshine625 profile image

    Linda Bilyeu 3 years ago from Orlando, FL

    You gotta do what you gotta do. I heard Dr. Oz say that a person usually toots about 45 times a day, most of the time you barely know you are cutting the cheese. I never heard barking spider before...that's a good one! :)

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi, Jodah,

    It is a funny topic, even if somewhat embarrassing. Fluff! I'd forgotten that one, as well as "Quiff." Thanks for your comment. Glad you liked the article.

  • Jodah profile image

    John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

    Very funny but truthful hub Lizzie, you gave me a smile for the day. As Suzanne said earlier, "Letting one rip" is probably the most common term used here, or with the kids we often say "Who fluffed?" Nice writing and oics.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi there, agaglia,

    Yes, this article did tend to stir up quite a lot of commentary. Thanks for stopping by; glad you liked the hub.

  • agaglia profile image

    agaglia 3 years ago

    You certainly got alot of comments from this fun hub. thanks for sharing the info about gas passing. :D

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hello, jonnycomelately,

    "Wind of Change," LOL great phrase for the topic! And that was a hilarious story. I can only imagine.

    Thanks so much for your contribution; I'm most pleased you enjoyed the article.

  • jonnycomelately profile image

    Alan 3 years ago from Tasmania

    DzyMsLizzy , you have done a great service to humanity here, might be considered "The Wind Of Change."

    It reminds me of a story, told to me by a friend, of a large hall with over 200 meditators sitting in absolute silence for one hour. The Swami was sitting in the lotus position up on the stage.

    All of a sudden, someone in the room let out a fart. There was silence for about 30 seconds, then someone could not hold in their mirth and sniggered. The room quickly filled with uncontainable laughter.

    The Swami remained totally silent, yet naturally very conscious of the situation. Gradually the laughter subsided, the room returned to absolute silence once again, and the meditation resumed to complete the hour.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    LOL, WiccanSage!

    I can only imagine. I've never had that kind of flu bug, but it sounds as if you handled it the best way you could. If we can't laugh at ourselves, there's truly no hope.

    Thanks so much for sharing your story, and your spousal agreement. LOL.... Glad you enjoyed the article, and that I was able to provide you with a new euphemism!

  • WiccanSage profile image

    Mackenzie Sage Wright 3 years ago

    This gave me a good laugh. Count me & my husband as one of those couples who just toot away. Very early on we agreed to just get over it; when there's no company over, let'er rip.

    One time we came down with this really odd flu virus-- a gassy flu/stomach virus, and the strangest noises and odors were coming out both ends, belching and farting, for 2-3 days. As sick as we felt, as gross as it was, we had to laugh because we couldn't stop.

    I have never heard of barking spider! That's a new one. Great hub.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi there, Jeannieinabottle--

    LOL You are most welcome. Glad you enjoyed this bit of hot air! ;-)

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    Thank you for covering this subject and daring to go where few have dared to go before. :-)

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    @ FlourishAnyway--Hee hee--I’m most pleased that you got your daily dose of laughter from this hub! I can’t imagine trying to escape to the bathroom in time to let fly. Although, an acquaintance of mine years ago was guilty of letting go some true reekers, and her son-in-law would say, “Wow! You’re supposed to step out the back door to do that!” LOL Thanks so much for your contribution!

    @ Pocono foothills--You are so correct about cultural differences. One rather well-known such difference is in some cultures where burping loudly at the table is considered a compliment to the cook, rather than an embarrassing function for which to apologize. And yes, guys seem to get away with passing gas wherever and whenever they want, while it is considered “unladylike” for women to even have gas. The old double-standard rears its head again! Thanks so much for stopping by and adding to the conversation.

    @LKMoreo1--LOL I can only imagine! I know I have to endure similar things when in the presence of my son-in-law and two grandsons. That is where I came up with the concept of the “fart contest.” I’m glad you enjoyed the article, and I appreciate your comment. Thank you!

  • LKMore01 profile image

    LKMore01 3 years ago

    After spending the past holiday week with about seven adult males, I wish I had seen the fart chart earlier, MsLizzy. Highly entertaining!

  • pocono foothills profile image

    John Fisher 3 years ago from Easton, Pennsylvania

    @DzyMsLizzy-Very nicely written and entertaining Hub. Personally, I fart in the presence of my wife all the time; however, she will not fart in my presence. Perhaps it's considered an undignified thing for a lady to do in Russian culture, but she always assured me that it's ok for me to do it because it's a natural process. I; however, do not fart in public places, unless I am fairly certain I can produce an SBD fart.

  • FlourishAnyway profile image

    FlourishAnyway 3 years ago from USA

    Oh this was hilarious! I have to share it. I've never heard of some of the phrases. My mother tells of a time when she was first married to my dad when she went into the bathroom in order to fart. I cannot imagine. This is so funny.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    ROFLMAO, PoeticFailosophy! Good one!

  • PoeticFailosophy profile image

    Diana F. King-Fyre :: DECEASED, 1962-2014, Rest in Peace 3 years ago from Cuzco, Peroo

    Seek medical attention if your farts peel wallpaper or cause third-degree burns in your crevice.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hello padmendra,

    It is actually medical research that shows it is normal to pass gas an average of 15 times a day. This is not pathology; this is normal. It becomes abnormal and a need to see the doctor arises if it far surpasses that. Remember, "average" means a compilation from a large segment of society. Anywhere within the average is considered "normal." If you are having this problem, for example, 50 or 100 times a day, then yes, you should examine your diet and consult a doctor. Otherwise, no worries.

    And actually, the original poster's question WAS about the manners aspect, and not the health aspect.

    Thank you for stopping by.

  • padmendra profile image

    PADMENDRA S R 3 years ago from DELHI/NCR

    Ans: referring to my last response to your question ,my dear friend ,I would like to put forward my reason to say that “The necessity is that we need to go to the doctor to find out the cause of gas trouble. If it is cured in a proper way, the question as mentioned above will not require to be answered.” Is because farting does not intend that we need to meet the doctor however if it is just once in a while but if the situation persists than surely you need to consult a doctor. Why, because farting , as considered normal, causes due to stomach disorder. It no doubt gives relief to the person but also indicates that your digestive system is giving you alarms that it is getting disturbed by he lifestyle you have choose or by the eating habits of yours and that needs to be corrected.

    That is the only reason I have asked to consult a doctor which would enable you to have a good lifestyle and good stomach and you would never wish to fart.

    Returning to your question about farting in front of the family or partner: it might not be object able as our family cares for us and understands our health issues however it would not be welcomed at all by anyone. And moreover the question is not about others but about the health of your stomach and finally as a whole .

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    LOL, drbj--I wonder if The Bard ever posited such a query? Glad you got a kick out of this, and found some new euphemisms. Thanks very much for stopping by.

  • drbj profile image

    drbj and sherry 3 years ago from south Florida

    To toot or not to toot, that is the question. Loved your treatment of the subject, Liz, and you enhanced my flatulence-description vocabulary immeasurably. :)

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    @ Bob Bamberg--Glad I was able to contribute to your "education." Sorry to hear about your smelly bowling partner. That's awful, given that you are virtually a captive "audience."

    I nearly fell out of my chair laughing at your exposé of the snot locker antics. You are so right about that! I saw a woman I once knew use the restaurant's CLOTH napkin for that, then leave it on her plate. I found that truly disgusting.

    Thanks very much for your contribution and the votes!

    @ Twighlight Lawns--ah, yes. I do love the Brits and their more tolerant sense of humor. They've given us the hilarious antics of "bad boy" Benny Hill, and the sly innuendos tossed about in "Are You Being Served?" I recall a joke similar to your tale about the organist:

    A young woman is entertaining her boyfriend at home, and has a gas problem. She suddenly asks, "Rufus, would you like me to play 'The Storm' on the piano for you?" "Sure!" he replied. When she gets to a very bassy, noisy part, she lets it go. He politely applauds. After a bit, she again feels the need to let fly, and asks if he'd like to hear 'The Storm' again. He agrees, but adds, "This time, you can leave out the part where the lightning strikes the outhouse."

    Very funny story you told about the schoolboy's fondest wish! Hilarious.

    Thank you so much for your delightful comment. I'm tickled pink that you liked the article that well. Come back any time!

  • Twilight Lawns profile image

    Twilight Lawns 3 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K.

    Thank you so much. I loved this hub. It is a very “English” thing to enjoy a good fart - or at least talk about it.

    There are very many jokes about farting that have entertained us for many years.

    I have a character in several of the stories and Christmas cards I send, in which a Mrs Parker-Brown entertains the residents of a Retirement Home for People of Better class by playing hymns and carols on her pump organ. Unfortunately, Mrs P-B is afflicted with serious flatulence and the sounds from her pump organ, as she furiously pedals away, are frequently drowned by baser tones from one wonders where.

    There is a British film (movie) ‘Love Actually’ in which a young school lad is given a task by his English teacher to write a story about what he would most like at Christmas. His desire is that at Christmas, farts would become visible, so that, when Grandmother farts (as she always does) at the Christmas dinner table, everybody sees it and, for once, the dog isn’t blamed.

    His fondest desire is to see the Queen (Elizabeth II) also being exposed/identified/caught. We see a little clip of her walking in the grounds of Windsor Castle with other members of the Royal Family. As she walks along chatting, we see and hear her drop a lovely one, and as it floats away on the air, the other members of the group turn right or left to escape its pungency.

    Priceless, but unfortunately it is one of the deleted scenes. Not because it’s offensive, but because the movie (film) would be too long with it included.

    Sorry for writing an almost hub as a comment, but I loved your observations.

  • Bob Bamberg profile image

    Bob Bamberg 3 years ago from Southeastern Massachusetts

    Fun hub, Lizzy...educational, too. I learned some new words! Out of the 12 synonyms you provided, I'd only heard of 5...I've led a sheltered life. One of my bowling teammates occasionally lets a SBD one slip and the damn toxic cloud hangs over the ball rack for what seems like an eternity.

    Isn't it a strange culture that finds it disgusting to fart at the dinner table, yet gives a pass to loudly emptying the contents of one's nose into a tissue or hanky, do the circular probe for the last of the nose nuggets, and end with a flourish by "opening the book" and examining the results, even in a restaurant! Voted up and funny.

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi there, cat!

    LOL...I wonder if that could be a study for the Mythbusters to undertake? They have delved into this topic before, but not as regards fish... hahaha.

    Yes, the ever-popular blame the dog! We have cats, and a couple of them are notorious for jettisoning some real room-clearing doozies!

    Thanks much--glad you enjoyed this bit of fluff.

  • cat on a soapbox profile image

    Catherine Tally 3 years ago from Los Angeles

    Well, I've never seen air bubbles from a fish posterior, but we mammals are notorious! It's only natural, but we still look to blame the dog or dread being left in the store aisle when the deliverer of an SBD has made a quick getaway. How I used to dread those long morning exams in a quiet lecture hall! Loved the hub, MsLizzy :)

  • DzyMsLizzy profile image
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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    @ Suzanne Day--Glad you found this worthy of laughter. It can be amusing, even amidst the potential embarrassment. Thanks much for the votes!

    @ Author Cheryl--Well, thanks very much for the added information. I will consider that as fulfilling my motto of 'learn something new each day.' Thanks for stopping by!

  • Author Cheryl profile image

    Cheryl A Whitsett 3 years ago from Jacksonville, Fl

    Well since you don't know about bugs and fish I can assure you that fish do and also our iguanas pass gas right before they expel their poo. lol

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    Suzanne Day 3 years ago from Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

    Quite an amusing topic! In Australia, we call it "letting one go" or "letting her rip". I've never heard of a butt trumpet, but will be sure to shout it the next time my partner passes wind when I'm in the room. Good picture, by the way - voted up etc!

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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hi, billybuc!

    Actually, that term was new to me within the last few years, and we are both the same age. Glad you got some chuckles out of this! Many thanks for stopping by.

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    Bill Holland 3 years ago from Olympia, WA

    Barking spider? In 65 years I have never heard that one. I love it. Actually I was laughing at the title; from then on it got seriously funny. :)

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    Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

    Hello, Poetic Failosophy,

    Thanks much. Glad you enjoyed this somewhat silly article. I did see the response from the fellow who thinks it is a matter for medical intervention. He must have a lot of cramps from holding it in! LOL

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    Diana F. King-Fyre :: DECEASED, 1962-2014, Rest in Peace 3 years ago from Cuzco, Peroo

    Lol, good stuff and excellent artwork! I'm getting a range of responses, including one guy who thinks that farting is a sign you need to go the doctor since healthy people never fart. Maybe he has a golden colon. I envy him.