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For Crying Out Loud!

Updated on June 28, 2016

Shades of Blue

Crying lets the blues out.
Crying lets the blues out. | Source

For Crying Out Loud!

People in this culture say that crying doesn’t help, but they are wrong. Crying is a release of emotional pain and it most certainly does help. It is how we heal are emotional wounds and cleanse our bodies of stress hormones and other toxins that have built up due to the stress of whatever situation.

People in this culture learn not to cry. They learn it is weak and unprofessional. Men learn it is a female weakness and must be avoided lest they be labeled feminine. Women are allowed to cry, but within limits (Not in public for example), I think because women can not often control their tears. Men seem to so learn easily not to cry as a definition of Manhood. .

Crying is human and a universal trait. We all cry as infants, indeed it is the only way we can communicate at that age. When people cry in this culture they are called babies as if that is the only appropriate age to cry. Crying is very much associated with childhood. When we “grow up” we have to learn not to cry, that is one of the rites of passage into adulthood.

The problem is adults need to cry sometimes more than children. Often childhood crying is a form of communication, but adult crying is pure stress release. With all the stress of this culture it’s amazing we have repressed this natural healing urge to cry. Indeed condemned it for all intents and purposes except for mourning of a loved one, but even then people choke back their tears and “stay strong” or “be brave”.

In this culture it is braver to cry than not to cry because crying is so condemned. We all need to cry. If you are reading this, do yourself a favor and let yourself cry when you feel like it and try not to let the world judge you too much.

Light in Shadow

Crying is the shadow and the release we experience from it is the light.
Crying is the shadow and the release we experience from it is the light. | Source

Evidence of Tear Suppression

It's not hard to find tear suppression in this culture just look at song lyrics.

  • Don't Cry Out Loud - Melissa Manchester

  • "Don't you cry no more" Line from Carry On My Wayward Son - Kansas

  • Don't Cry No Tears - Neal Young

  • Don't Cry - Guns and Roses

  • Stop Crying - Bob Dylan

  • Stop Crying you heart out - Oasis

  • "Big boys don't cry" Line from I'm Not In Love - 10 CC

  • Grown Men Don't Cry - Tim McGraw

  • No More Tears - Ozzy Ozbourne

  • "Doctor, my eyes cannot see the sky. Is this the prize for having learned how not to cry?" Line from Doctor My Eyes - Jackson Brown

Shining Through

After the dark clouds of our tears often the light comes shining through.
After the dark clouds of our tears often the light comes shining through. | Source

More on the Health Benefits of Crying

As I mentioned above tears release stress hormones. Doctor Judith Orloff in her article "The Health Benefits of Tears" published in Psychology Today writes:

"Emotional tears have special health benefits. Biochemist and “tear expert” Dr. William Frey at the Ramsey Medical Center in Minneapolis discovered that reflex tears are 98% water, whereas emotional tears also contain stress hormones which get excreted from the body through crying. After studying the composition of tears, Dr. Frey found that emotional tears shed these hormones and other toxins which accumulate during stress. Additional studies also suggest that crying stimulates the production of endorphins, our body’s natural pain killer and “feel-good” hormones.” Interestingly, humans are the only creatures known to shed emotional tears, though it’s possible that that elephants and gorillas do too. Other mammals and also salt-water crocodiles produce reflex tears which are protective and lubricating.

Crying makes us feel better, even when a problem persists. In addition to physical detoxification, emotional tears heal the heart."

She writes about how people apologize for crying and she feels bad for them. I remember once when I was in my 20's I apologized to my lover for crying and she said "Don't be sorry you cried any more than you would be sorry you laughed". The bottom line is crying is good for you and it is natural.

When Crying is Overwhelming

Sometimes it's hard to stop crying once the flood gates are open. This can be scary and inconvenient. You may have a lot to cry about and mourn, but you don't have hours to devote to crying. Below is a link that can help. Remember crying is good for you, but too much crying may indicate a serious depression.

Who's Crying Now?

Do you cry when you feel the need?

See results

Who's Stopping You?

Do you have people in your life who tell you not to cry?

See results

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    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 11 months ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      It is good to know that stress hormones are released when we cry! I find that I cry the most when I either stressed or angry. When there is a crisis, I don't usually cry until it is over. I don't know if that is good or bad! Crying does help me feel better, however, no matter when it is done.

    • AuntLillian profile image
      Author

      Lillian Hughes 11 months ago from Barre, VT

      Thanks for your comment Denise. I think crying after the crisis is over is good and it is common.

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