How I Am Dealing With Two "Bullies" Who Show Up Every Day Of My Life
The guy standing up, tormenting the weaker kids, is a bully. A bully does well when he or she goes against a weaker person.
This hub is lovingly-dedicated to Livingsta, a dear friend and very-appreciated follower. Thanks. (Kenneth).
This pathway that I am on is treacherous, hard to see at times, tough to remember its rules and easy to forget that “I” do not walk this way alone.
Not all can walk this pathway. But so many others do besides myself. Still though, this mysterious, fog-laden pathway is seriously-lonely at times. So lonely that the only friend I have are the almost-muted sounds of my own heart beating.
I apologize for sounding dramatic, but these “are” my true feelings about the two incurable diseases I have, Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy.
To briefly explain these two “bullies,” Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy, the first, Accelerated Fibromyalgia is a disease of the muscular system that defined means that a person with “this” disease suffers and endures constant-pain around the clock, year ‘round. It is very similar to having an abcess tooth inside your body and never finding relief.
To further explain, my nerve sensors in my brain do not fire correctly to send my body the necessary messages for my body to heal itself. Case in point, “I” can only take my medications every day of my life and take spinal injections in a nearby town every three months until I leave this stage of life.
Neurothopy is an incurable affliction of the nerve endings that cannot be cured. Yes, there also is round-the-clock pain, day in and day out. Not something I would wish on my worst enemy.
A few symptoms of Accelerated Fibromyalgia are:
1.) Soreness in your muscles that feels like you are recovering from falling off a ladder.
2.) Stiffness, especially after riding for more than two hours.
3.) Lack of strength.
4.) Shooting pains run from the soles of your feet to the crown of your head.
5.) Depression from having to explain to people who only judge you by your outside, “oh, you look fine,” but if they only felt what you feel on your inside.
My personal depression came from knowing that my coming and going as I pleased was either going to be severely-limited or gone for good.
To make matters worse, I was faced with the fact that I couldn’t work at a job anymore, thus, not being able to support my wife, two great hotbeds for clinical-depression.
Neurothopy is comparable to having your nerve-endings hurt like a stubbed toe, except twice as bad, especially on the soles of your feet.
NOTE: Accelerated Fibromyalgia can be a “deceptive mistress,” in the fact that one day you feel fine. Fine enough to say, “I am cured!” But beware. In a day or two, this awful disease will attack with a vengenace--with pain twice, or maybe three times as bad.
I do not talk that much about my diseases that I refer to as “bullies,” due to the fact that I fully-realize that there are more people, young and old, from all walks of life, on and off of HubPages who are suffering worse diseases that I have--namely cancer, leukemia, aids, and other “bullies,” that love to torment us human beings simply because we put up with it.
Am I wrong? I don’t think so.
In 2003 when I was diagnosed with these two diseases, at first, I was confused because at that age, 46, I had never suffered such diseases as Accelerated Fibromyalgia or Neurothopy. Needless to say, I was stunned to go along with the confusion. I guess the overall shock of knowing that I was never going to be well, took the edge off of my curiosity of wanting to find out more about these physical ailments.
“You are never going to be well,” explained a very-gifted physician at Kirkland Clinic in Birmingham, Alabama. “you can just treat the symptoms and learn to live with it,” he added.
I did appreciate his honesty, for up to then, I had only been told by other doctors in other clinics, “we will have to run this test or that test, until we ‘nail it down,’ Kenny,” and let me share this with you: That can be very, very frustrating over a year’s time.
But in a short time, I began to do online research and talk to others who had Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy, and from this work I came away with a few new “weapons,” which I began to use in my “warfare,” against these “bullies,” just so I can experience maybe a few hours of (some) quality of life.
Humor me as I share these “weapons” with you, those on (or off) of HubPages who might be facing a life of pain with diseases such as Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy.
1.) DON’T GIVE UP - although this sounds “corny,” it is pure wisdom in three words. Giving up means you are defeated. Listen to me. Your life is a priceless gift. Learn to fight for it.
2.) BE PATIENT - as much as you can while you learn to endure these diseases. I realize that patience isn’t a cure, but by being patient, you are giving medical scientists and research clinics the necessary time in which to find cures, or methods for “us” to use to find “that” area of peace and some degree of relief.
3.) KEEP INFORMED - as much as possible. Go online and read information given on medical-based websites that deal with Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy. As a dear friend and follower, “catgypsy,” has told me, “one day you might find “that one” paper or story that will be your answer to your suffering,” and she is right. Just be diligent in your searches for information that will help you. Or someone in your family who has Accelerated Fibromyalgia or Neurothpy.
4.) MAKE YOUR MEDICAL APPOINTMENTS - just because you “might” have a version of Accelerated Fibromyalgia, doesn’t mean that you should just stop going to your doctor or pain care specialist. These professionals keep themselves abreast of the most-current findings on these and other diseases and they pass them along to their patients. Trust your pain care specialist because they have “your” best interest at heart.
5.) HAVE FAITH - in our Maker. Yes, our Maker. You do not have to be a priest or high-ranking church official to talk to God. He is “the” BEST listener in the universe. I am not preaching any you or anyone, I just know from first-hand experience that My Heavenly Father is always near. Always there, willing and more than able to give me and you the peace and comfort we need as human creations to live as peaceful and happy as possible.
6.) DO NOT COMPLAIN - and yes, this “is” tough to not do when your entire body is screaming for relief in the middle of the dark night. In my case, when these urges come for me riddle the air with “why me?” or “I don’t deserve this,” or other mortal phrases, I am learning to just quietly quote my heart, (one of) my favorite Bible verses, Isaiah 54:17, “ . . .and no weapon shall be formed for our destruction,” even it takes numerous times, it works. God governs His Word and how it is used.
and this final tip that I confess I use a lot.
7.) DO NOT RUN - from these “bullies,” Accelerated Fibromyalgia or Neurothopy. Why? Because they love to see “us” cower with fear and trembling in their shadows. You see, diseases such as these are not geared for people to stand firm and say with a stubborn tone, “I am not running from you for I am not afraid of you anymore!” I have done this a lot over the past nine years and such as in the case of the proverbial school yard bully of old who pushed weaker kids around and stole their lunch money, these painful “bullies,” are not that big or bad. It’s “us,” who have the power to stand firm.
And with the above tip, do NOT be meek, timid or weak in your stance. Get down-right mean about your quality of life. Be as aggressive as a northwest Grizzly protecting her cubs. Show these two “bullies,” Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothpy that you are serious about staying-put, not moving or hiding in the foggy evenings of your life.
A person is sometimes defined by their pride. In themselves and how they handle adversities such as these sicknesses.
Be brave. Be tough. And most of all, be unmovable.
I sincerely hope that this one hub has been of help to only one person who shares Accelerated Fibromyalgia and Neurothopy with me. That is my aim: to know that one suffering soul has found some peace of mind and a new way to face the “bullies,” in their life.
And until the day comes that modern medical science finds a cure for these diseases I am learning to live not in the personal defeats of my past, but on the horizons of hope of whatever tomorrow’s God may have for me.