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How To Relax When You Are Becoming Too Stressed and Focused!

Updated on February 12, 2013
My training partner and I enjoying a well deserved night out at a foam party. What a great night!
My training partner and I enjoying a well deserved night out at a foam party. What a great night! | Source

Too Focused?

This is something which I, personally, could not be more guilty of. I let friends down just to be able to maintain my diet, workout and try to improve my body even further than it already is. However... I feel the need for self-reflection now. Recently I have tried going out more and exploring my social network much more than I previously did, the image to the right is of myself and my training partner enjoying a foam party held within a nightclub. The results of doing so made me as a person, much much happier. Not only was I out, and having a good time, but it also gave me the chance to show off the blood, sweat and tears I have poured into my body! Before going out more, I always had the presumption that going out meant, eating meals out which are not as good for me as home cooked alternative, drinking alcohol which has obvious negative effects and just generally wasting money. However I discover you do not necessarily have to do any of this to be able to have a good time. This foam party, I recently went to was one of the best nights of my life. I did not spend too much, and did not have a ridiculous hangover in the morning. Throughout the night people where appreciating my body (mainly checking out my abs, but hey ho... what can you do!) and I met a lot of new people I definitely would not have met if I would not have gone out.

Some signs of being too focused are as follow, of which I am a prime example of each;

  • The constant thought process of things that do not really matter greatly. For me this included, how my body is, digestion, how many hours has it been since I last ate, What muscle group feels like it has not been worked in a while... All these questions bouncing around in your head, is not necessarily healthy for you. Yes, it may give you great results if implemented correctly, but will leave you feeling stressed out and anxious all the time.
  • Declining invitations to go out. This is one I am majorly guilty of, because my training schedule has me doing exercise every single day, I have turned people down time and time again, just because I wanted that time to train.
  • Shutting yourself off from others is another key reason you may be focusing too much. Your family, friends and work colleagues who you are around daily will begin to look like almost negative influences in your eyes, and you will begin to shut them out.

Do not get me wrong, I am not some crazy guy obsessed with exercise, however since I split from my last girlfriend, it has been the one thing I can really get stuck into.

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How To Relax

Relaxation is where you are calm and collected, There is no particular worry circulating within your mind, and anxiety is nowhere to be seen. It is a humble place which can be very difficult to achieve. Here are some examples, how you can relax;

  • Recognize Stress - Just by simply recognising the fact you are becoming stressed will immediately give you the opportunity to do something about it. However recognising it in the first place, can be tricky. If all you do is think about things non-stop, your career, lifestyle, missing soap operas. Experiencing body tension, headaches, back aches, neck aches along with general soreness. If you are irritable, short-tempered and maybe unable to focus on a task in hand. Your diet is going out of the window... These are all signs you are becoming stressed. Begin to recognise these, so you can o something about them before it is too late!
  • Set aside time to relax. Give yourself time in your schedule, no matter how busy you are, make time for this, it is important! In this time, you should try to think positively and let go of any guilt that you may harbour. Remember, everyone relaxes in different ways, depending on what they enjoy. For one individual it may be just chilling, while playing on a games console, while for another it may be reading a book. Whatever gets you relaxed, set time aside to do this, and make sure you do it!
  • If your stress levels are beginning to affect your diet, then make sure you gather the motivation to do something about it. Your diet will greatly determine your moods and energy levels. Eating a healthy balanced diet is vital to relaxation. Other dieting tips to reduce stress include; avoiding excessive refined sugar, eating fresh fruit and vegetables, taking multi-vitamins, eat plenty of low calorie protein and avoiding excessive caffeine.
  • Ironic as it may be to this hub but exercising every day has been proven to reduce stress levels within the body. If you are not used to exercising, then just try walking around the block or park, going swimming, taking the stairs, even simply park further away from the store entrance when shopping. It will all add up!
  • Go for a massage. Massages help undo tension and 'knots' caught up in the body, in turn, undoing 'knots' within the mind. Helping to reduce stress.
  • Practice meditation. Meditation and forms of this, such as Yoga, has been proven to reduce stress levels and tension in the body, as well as making you more subtle and flexible in the process.
  • Spend time with your pet, if not get a pet. Pets are great, they love you and usually want to be around you. By being around a living animal like this will result in positive thought processes being fired off around the brain, hence reducing stress and allowing yourself to become more relaxed.


How To Stay Relaxed

Mostly stress and anxiety are brought onto you by external influences, this may be someone negative or something that has greatly annoyed you or even something as simple as someone not letting you go at the zebra crossing. It is easy to become stressed if you let these things affect you. Here are some tips on how to stay relaxed;

  • Develop shields to those who drain you emotionally. People who are negative around you will bring stress to your door. No one likes a negative person. This technique can involve not talking to stressed and negative people. However, to cut them out completely may be considered a little harsh. Instead build yourself an invisible shield, try not to let what they are stressing or moaning about affect you. Just think of what they are saying as fictional. This will help you cast it aside and not let it affect your life.
  • Disconnect yourself in times of building anger. We all get angry at times, it is natural. However, to let this anger develop into stress is something which can be very negative for the mind and body. The moment you feel yourself getting angry with someone or at something, try putting the phone down, closing the email folders, walking away from it. This will give you time to think about what it is your are getting angry about and not do something irrationally which you may regret in times to come. An excellent example of this, is when you can angry write a draft of your response, leave it for a whole day. If tomorrow you come back to it and it is still how you feel, then consider actually sending it. However, if you have calmed down and changed your mind, you will be grateful you did not send it.
  • Avoid toxic personalities. By this, I mean avoid socialising with people who always try and push the guilt or blame on to someone else. Even if they are family members, these people will make you feel bad about yourself and things your have done. Steer clear of these!
  • Be more physical with friends, I do not mean go and punch a friend... Instead give out more hugs to people. Being openly positive will give you a kind and caring feeling, this will help release the build up of any stress you may have.
  • Breathe, just breathe. Remembering to take time to practice your breathing can be easily forgotten, however it is important to reduce the effects of stress. Breathe in, hold it and release. Long, slow, deep breathes will really calm the body and mind.
  • Spend time with people who share the same ambitions as you. By surrounding yourself with similar beings, you will be able share positive thoughts and goals with each other. Simply by knowing there are people like you out there, will help you think that you are not along in whatever struggle you may have, therefore keeping stress at bay.


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