How to Be Super Happy Amazing 10 Easy Steps
Most of us are in a in a constant “pursuit”. A “Pursuit of Happyness”, much like the father son duo in the 2006 Will Smith starrer, of the same name.
Unfortunately, most of us get distracted, diverted or give up the pursuit and does not end in Happiness as the real-life character played by Will Smith.
(Name of the movie is ‘Happyness not Happiness after a misspelled board, outside the son’s day care centre)
The miss spelling, I think is a big Freudian slip in our lives and our pursuits, because “happiness” is so ambiguous.
What is Happiness anyway?
This is an age-old question, answered by the Greeks centuries ago, in their inimitable way. They divided happiness into two streams, Hedonia and Eudaimonia.
Aristotle mentioned Hedonia, "those who conceived of happiness as pleasure and gratification". Eudaimonia, on the other hand was “an activity of the soul in accordance with virtue.”
Even today psychologist debate over the definitions and their intersection and overlapping of the two.
Hedonia and Eudaimonia.
Dr Nico Rose citing the work of University of Ottawa Professor Veronica Huta has this to say. ("Feel-good vs. feel-purpose: Hedonia and Eudaimonia as separate but connected pathways to happiness," 2016)
- pleasure, enjoyment, and satisfaction;
- and the absence of distress.
Eudaimonia which is more complex is about:
- clarifying one’s true self and deep values, staying connected with them, and acting in accord with them;
- understanding a bigger picture, relating to it, and contributing to it. This may include broader aspects of one´s life or identity, a purpose, the long term, the community, society, even the entire ecosystem;
- striving for higher quality and higher standards in one’s behaviour, performance, accomplishments, and ethics;
- self-actualization, fulfilling one’s potential and pursuing personal goals; growth, seeking challenges; and maturing as a human being.
Everyone agrees that there are, different levels of happiness, and most of the psychologists also agree that a complete happiness may be a seamless meshing of Hedonia and Eudaimonia.
Notwithstanding all these definitions of philosophers and psychologists, all of us, do have our own ideas of happiness. In the following paragraphs this article offer 10 practical doable ways for attaining a state of happiness.
Three are 6 don’ts and there are 4 does. After assimilating the 10 steps, if you notice that, the don’ts roughly correspond to Eudaimonia and the dos to Hedonia , you are not far from what the psychologist and philosophers think.
10 steps to a sustainable state of Happiness
Our aim is to follow these amazingly simple 10 steps to a sustainable state of Happiness.
The don’ts or habits to discard (Saviuc, 2011)
1 Don’t be adamant being right always
Arguments almost all ways to prove oneself right, leads to friction and to more serious consequences. Avoid, the urge for being right always, as the first step to happiness.
“The more a person needs to be right, the less certain he is.”
― Meir Ezra
2 Don’t blame others
Don’t blame others for your problems, be responsible yourself. It is a way of empowering yourself and ultimately making you happy.
“An important decision I made was to resist playing the Blame Game. The day I realized that I am in charge of how I will approach problems in my life, that things will turn out better or worse because of me and nobody else, that was the day I knew I would be a happier and healthier person. And that was the day I knew I could truly build a life that matters.”
― Steve Goodier
3 Don’t complain
Constant complaining instead of making things better vitiates the atmosphere leading to unhappiness. consciously avoid complaining
“Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them.”
― Lou Holtz
4 Don’t criticise
Criticising is similar to complaining, but often more vicious, thus producing more unpleasantness and unhappiness. Avoid criticising others, this will not annoy the person you are criticising and in turn also keeps us happy.
“Any fool can criticize, complain, and condemn—and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.”
― Dale Carnegie
5 Don’t give excuses
Do not give excuses to yourself and to others. Excuses are minds way of defending our unwillingness to solve or face the obvious. Excuses create and grow unhappiness.
“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can't achieve it.”
― Jordan Belfor
6 Don’t live your life to other people’s expectations.
If we put others opinion first, rather than listening to our inner self, it is time to stop. No one knows you better than yourself. No one is under any obligation to give what others expect. Just do or don’t do anything, just because someone else expect you to.
“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.”
― Bruce Lee
Dos or Habits to make your own
The first 3 does are based on a scientific study by Belle Beth Cooper of Buffer) ("10 simple things you can do today that will make you happy," 2020)
1 Exercise more, even 7 minutes could be enough
Exercise releases proteins and endorphins in our brain, this in turn makes us happier. Exercise can also help us relax, improve brain power and improve our self-image. Even a 7 minutes walk can change our mood significantly .
“If you are in a bad mood go for a walk. If you are still in a bad mood go for another walk.”
2 Sleep more
Sleep help us to recover and repair our bodies after a day’s work, sleep also is closely connected to our happiness. Sleep deprived people fail to recall pleasant memories but would recall unpleasant ones easily.
“Good night - may you fall asleep in the arms of a dream, so beautiful, you'll cry when you awake.”
― Michael Faude
3 Stay in touch and spend time with friends and family
The time spent with family and friends makes a big difference to how happy we feel, even for introverts. Call a friend you haven’t called a long time. Just enjoy the conversation.
“Family and friendships are two of the greatest facilitators of happiness.” –John C. Maxwell
4 Be childish and play more
Never loose the child in you. Children never have a problem in being happy, why should we.
“A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.” ~ R.C. Ferguson
Feel-good vs. feel-purpose: Hedonia and Eudaimonia as separate but connected pathways to happiness. (2016, June 19). Mappalicious. https://mappalicious.com/2016/06/19/feel-good-vs-feel-purpose-hedonia-and-eudaimonia-as-separate-but-connected-pathways-to-happiness
Saviuc, L. D. (2011, May 30). 15 things you should give up to be happy. Purpose Fairy. https://www.purposefairy.com/3308/things-you-should-give-up-be-happy/
10 simple things you can do today that will make you happy. (2020, June 30). Buffer Resources. https://buffer.com/resources/be-happy-today/