Say Yes to Mental Health: Fighting Anxiety and Building Confidence as Teenagers
Who am I?
Lets start off with the basic stuff. What is it that starts changing when you hit puberty? Is it only that the ambiance around you changes or does your outlook towards the ambiance changes too? I think the answer is quite obvious, both the things change with time. as we grow up we start to see things from a different perspective and the hormonal changes sometimes drive us crazy too. That's true, but hey look around you isn't the nature telling you anything? Is sure as hell is indeed. Change is something that we cannot change and have to accept. Coming back to the topic of identity crisis, if some of you aren't aware about it then lemme tell you that its a very basic thing that we face during all our teenage years. We start to wonder who are we and what is our purpose on this earth. This isn't something I am making up on my own and you can check this on internet on Wikipedia or amongst the works or psychologist Erik Erikson. According to him "Identity crisis is the failure to achieve ego identity during adolescence. The common problems faced by teenagers at home are their changing relationship with their parents, one of the most common and widespread area of problem. But wait, it ain't over as during sexual maturation most of us get into relationships and really don't want to loose the person of sometimes it's the other way round too, that is we are just using the person for our sexual needs and having just a casual thingie and the point here is most of the times our relationships be it with anyone going out of control.
I would like to recommend to every teenager this awesome book by Sean Covey- The 7 habits of highly effective teenagers. There are a lot of awesome things in it which are helpful at teenage. I would like to share just one thing here in the starting with you all, that whatever be the problems or the changes we face, always remember we are coming from God and going back to God. Just have faith in God and believe always that you are a creation of God and this is just a phase that will pass.
Starting off, first of all don't just expect to be loved by your parents, friends, your girlfriend/boyfriend without putting efforts on your own self which reminds me of the famous quote "A man who cannot love himself cannot love anyone else." Believe me it's true to the core and it's meaning is a little deeper and we need to figure out what the context is. See, why do we love anyone close to us? Be it parents, relative, friends, boyfriend/girlfriend? Isn't the answer obvious that there is some quality in them that we like? Be it the unconditional love we get from out parents that starts getting conditional with a lot of expectations that we sometime or the other fail to fulfill up to the mark or be it our crush who is a sexy lass or a handsome lad who is the caption of basketball team, debating club and be it anything and coming back to the teenagers who normally feel like a potato and sometimes feel alienated too because of not being able to fit in, remember that we like someone of something because of the qualities they posses. If that was way too indirect then let me get to the point straight, all the people we like or love or merely admire are working on themselves and love themselves, remember always that if we love others because of some reason then we really need to develop some quality and skill about themselves that we admire and hence we should start working on our own selves because we just admire those people because of their love for themselves and life and that they are actually working their ass off to gain it.
- learn something new. Yes, what's wrong in it and hey just don't be afraid to learn something new and about failing. Everyone starts from a scratch only. You can see videos from YouTube or any other online site, take classes from professionals and if you wanna save some bucks go to someone you know from childhood who specializes in any of the kingdom you wanna enter, be it sketching, dancing, singing playing any instrument or anything of your choice you will start noticing a change in yourself and one key point I would like to tell you is choose something that you enjoy the most that most probably you would be knowing only.
- physical exercise is very important for us to be active physically as well as to learn a lot of important lessons of life. You learn discipline, you become more organized, learn to accept defeat too and hey not really always, work your ass off and you win also. Remember, Messi has said "I get up early, I go to bed late and I have been practicing for years and suddenly i become an overnight success." It is clear that no pain , no gain. so really you need to start working on yourself now and it gives you an awesome complexion, glow on your skin and keeps your blood circulation awesome making you healthier and giving you a stronger body with and attractive physique.
I know this sounds boring to most of us but yeah, choose a career of your interest and it will soon become your kingdom. Remember many actors have put their acting career on take and pursued education in the field of their interest just to gain knowledge. Nataile Portman has said "I don't love studying, I hate studying. I like learning, it is beautiful". Yes, choose a career of your interest and attend classes and do a little bit of self-study too. By attending classes you gain confidence as you speak in front of people your mind and learn to debate about certain topics and stand up for your point of view and hence learn to socialize, present your point without defending other people and make new contacts unknowingly or knowingly which helps you to grow better as this might help you in your professional life ahead and who knows you might end up getting some of your best friends there only.
Balance- This is a key which is very important. always maintain a balance in every aspect of your life. Be it balance between professional and personal life, studies and extra curricular activities or anything like family and friends.
Regularity- Yes, no matter how big we are a fan of fast and furious series, sticking to the roots and the basics, slow and steady wins the race. So yeah, there is no short cut to anything. we really need to put our soul, heart, efforts, time in everything we do and learn, you should be passionate about everything you do in short and the results will be more effective.
What will others say or think about me? -
Yes, some of us really get influenced by others to a lot of extend that we base our life on them. Be it your parents, significant other, friends or anything, always remember that you cannot stop birds to pass by your head but you can always stop them from making a nest on your head right? Too indirect? Alright, coming to the point what I mean is you don't really need to obey people but that doesn't mean you are free to be an animal, honor them. Don't retaliate when someone's ideology doesn't match with yours, take a deep breath and put your views calmly forward and then do what you want and you will see that you stop a big quarrel from taking place as most of the times we are not hurt instead our ego is hurt and remember psychology has proved that our mouth acts faster than our brain. so watch out your words especially the impulsive and short-tempered teenagers.