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How to poke your eye

Updated on March 16, 2011
This is that thing that you should poke. Although you probably shouldn't.
This is that thing that you should poke. Although you probably shouldn't.

Now you may be wondering why you would consider poking your own eye, however, I can assure you that there are many reasons for doing so. For example you may have a ummmm well I cannot think of any at the moment but it is still vital that you know this. You will thank me if your life depends on it.

First of all you will need to wash your hands as you do not want your eye to go all disgusting as it explodes in your socket causing puss to be flung at anything or anyone nearby do you? No. I thought as much.

After washing your hands you are ready to start the poking of the eye. To perform this you must raise your finger (Any finger will do) up to eye level and point it towards the eye in which you intend to insert your digit into.

When your finger has been raised to the level at which your eye resides you are free to begin the long and arduous task of actually poking yourself. You must slowly move your finger gradually closer towards your eye, when your finger is about 3cm away from your eye you can progress onwards to the next section. The poke.

Thee actual poke can be performed in many different ways, such as with a fork of whilst during a handstand, however I will explain how to carry out the traditional fast-pokey-eye. To start you must move your finger towards your eye as fast as you possibly can, trying to get it as far into your eyeball as possible.

And so that is how you poke your own eye. Try some different ways and experiment. Oh and always have an ambulance at the ready. Good luck and remember kids, don't punch polar bears. They will eat you up! Much like you should eat your greens.

Note:The author of this hub will not be held responsible for any injuries caused by it. It's your own fault, The moral of this story is, well there is no moral but if there was I would put it here.


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    • Mark Ewbie profile image

      Mark Ewbie 7 years ago from UK

      I like the moral of the story. At least I am sure I would have liked it.