- Quality of Life & Wellness
I Feel Stuck
This cat is feeling stuck!
Are you feeling stuck?
Are you feeling stuck? Feeling like you are going no where, that you are at a stagnant point in your life? As of now, if this applies to you, you are to no longer feel like this. At the end of this article you will have gained the basic knowledge to keep progressing in life and to make changes and to take action NOW! There are going to be 3 sections to this article that I am going to go over that will benefit you. Once you have read all of this and you begin to take action, throughout your course, you will have doubts, you may hit plateaus but you have to trust the process and enjoy it. It’s your journey and it’s a journey for a reason, it won’t be a smooth sailing so make sure to keep that end goal in mind.
It starts with YOU!
First of all, before I get into anything at all. At the end of the day the problem is YOU, now don’t get offended, if you are, you don’t understand but one day you will. Right now, before you read or start anything, you need to stop blaming others because at the end of the day the problem is you BUT of course there are other factors. This is why the problem is you, yes you come across bumps and bruises, hills and mountains in your life, but who gets over them? You do. How you react to events and how they affect you is all up to YOU. You may not understand now but one day you will and you will be better for it. One thing you can never do is put yourself down, because you know what, it's okay to fail and it's not even failing. You know why? Because failing once just means you come back with more knowledge! Keep pushing forward and one day this will make sense if it doesn't already.
The 3 sections
The 1st section is simple, what is the problem? Why do you feel stuck? Do you feel you are getting no where in School, University, your job? Do you feel you are in the wrong crowd, surrounded by the wrong people? Feel like your life is headed in the wrong direction? Find the problem or if there is more than one, write them all down, it’s a very simple step. You need to be real and vulnerable to yourself. Your answers may hurt or upset you deep down, but deep down you also know they are causing you pain and grief.
The 2nd section, it’s a little more complicated. Why are the problems that you listed actually causing issues? This is where you have to dig deep, I mean really deep because you may actually uncover more issues that stem deep into the roots of the issue. You need to dissect every reason why as to why the problem(s) you listed are affecting you in a negative way.
So here is a little bit of a criteria/design aspect you have to meet.
- Problem: List the one issue, whether it’s simply job, school, university, friends, personal reasons etc.
- Cause: What causes the above problem? Write down how the issue exists/
- Impact: Write how it directly impacts you and how it makes you feel.
You need to write the above for each and every problem. You have to be detailed and vulnerable to yourself.
This 3rd section is about taking action. So what consists of taking action? How do you do it? This is divided into two aspects, mental and physical. Let me help you break it down into what each aspect contains.
- Reaction to everyday living: How do you react to events throughout every day living, eg: work, living arrangements etc.
- Reaction to significant events: How do you react to significant events. Events that mean something to you or that do not happen on the regular, eg: a fight with a friend, parents etc.
- Positive thoughts: All of this will come down to how you react and if you react in a negative way. If you do, this is where you need to change into taking a more positive perspective on life. Once you do this, it will make a dramatic change because your true strength and maturity will show. No matter what happens, if you have a positive perspective and accept things that happen then you will be heading in the right direction and moving ever forward. If you already have a positive aspect on life well then, that is good for you! But can you improve? I believe there is always room for improvement even if you were ranked number 1 in the world at what you do, there is always room for improvement!
- Goals: To kick start the physical aspect, is to create a list of goals. Now I can’t help you with these, you are all on your own. This is where it relates back to your issues, how they are an issue and how it impacts you. Each goal needs to be specific to each issue. If the problem is ‘I feel lost at school’, how? ‘I don’t see the end result benefiting me’. Why? ‘I don’t feel it’s useful’. That is probably a poor example but it’s a basic reason as to how it’s an issue, so this is how you make a goal out of it. Goal: ‘Get more out of School to have a larger positive impact on my future.
- Plan: So the next phase is to create a plan on how to reach your goal. So if the goal is to ‘get more out of school to have a larger positive impact on your future’ then you need to create mini goals to help you achieve that. You need to really break it down. Write your current strength and weaknesses. A strength may be you work really well in class but then you may have weaknesses such as you don’t study or study as much as you should. So the steps to creating an effective plan, with step 1 being to write down mini goals that will help you achieve your main one. Step 2, writing down even smaller goals to reach you mini goals so that you can reach your main one. Even smaller goals may be stay more focused in class and have a tunnel vision, be more regimented and structured or even create different work environments at school or home. Ask the teacher to go to the library, sit at the front of the class or in a corner. So to create a plan you use your main goal(s) to create mini goals to create super mini goals. These goals will help you create the definition action plan necessary and help you stay on path headed in the right direction.
- Action: Now it is time to take action, you have dissected the issues, created your plan, now it’s time to put it all together. It is time to start today! Start today to make your life better for you.
How you react to everyday living.
Take action to complete super mini goals
How you react to significant events.
Plan: Mini goals
Use super mini goals to complete mini goals
Plan: Super mini goals
Use mini goals to complete main goals (this is a chain effect)
Take action now!
© 2017 Thomas O'Dwyer-Richards