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I Like You Is As Special As I Love You

Updated on October 16, 2014

A whole lot of people loved this child, but not so many liked him.

Little rascals are easy to love but not always so easy to like.
Little rascals are easy to love but not always so easy to like. | Source

Liking someone is not the same as loving them.

We are nearly required to love our families. And most of the time we do. But do we like them. Often we do not. This is especially true of extended "in-law" (and outlaw) type relations. Often it is true about family of origin where parties just plain grow apart. There is a special quality in being liked. "I like you" carries different just as special connotations as "I love you". Let us look at love and like. It is nice to be liked.

There was an older father and a four year old son. They were inseparable and the dad was a stay at home father. Needless to say they were very close indeed. Daily they would tell each other that the loved each other. Their bond was something really special. But one day at nap time the boy softly reached to the father and said, "I like you dad". This of course brought the father to joyful tears but also made him realize for the first time in his life the beautiful difference between love and like.

There was an old carpenter with a young apprentice. Of course it was truly manly man work that they did. The carpenter was grumpy and rough as they came. The young man was full of life and piss and vinegar. After a year of working together the young man told the carpenter that he really liked him. To hear the story, the old man told his wife that was the first time anyone had ever said that to him. In their will they left everything they had to the young man and his young family. At least that is how it was related to me at the bedside of the dying widow.

Just a good old song about sunshine that kind of fits here.

Old friends that we dearly love and like.

If we are fortunate to grow a little older we turn around one day and realize we have friends that we have had for a very long time. It seems that we end up loving them as BFFs. But the ones that really stick out are the ones we have gone through some troubles with and we liked having them close during those times. We can count on one hand those friends. We not only love them but like their company. That is special.

People are not the same as things. I love ice cream. And I like ice cream. I suppose some flavors and brands I just like. And I suppose I do not really love ice cream but those are the words we use when we really really like a thing. But it is different with people. I heard a mom say just the other day; "honey, love is when you really really like someone". That is just wrong. But most people accept that. Nope liking is different than loving. Love is not just a whole lot of like! And love does not mean like.

Now lucky marriages have that combo and should have that combo of love and like. There should be that love and tenderness but there should also be that best friend, like to be just hanging out together kind of relationship


I cannot find one scripture that tell us to like our neighbor or our enemy. Like is different. There is a concept in like that cannot be captured well in words. What makes us like someone? I imagine there are brain wave and temperature studies that show the brain lighting up in some area when we feeling the emotion of like and that it is different than love. There probably is some deep psychological meaning to people who love things and activities rather than like them. And the converse is probably true. There are people who just find it too darned hard to love. And we have all met people that cannot like anything yet love their families.

The author likes to write. The runner likes to run. Is it perhaps the epitome of obsessive issues when they elevate that like to love.

Some through there spiritual life are compelled to love everyone, even their enemies. That is a tough order but it is for many an order and not an option. It takes a lot of will power and practice and does not always work well for many people, perhaps most or even all. But nevertheless it is at the very least a goal that must be striven for. There is no such compulsion in any religion to like everyone. Don't you think that that is interesting.

Where do you fit in.

Do you like certain people and not love them?

See results

Do I love sunsets like this one?

Probably I just like them. But I do love the feeling of serenity that they give me.
Probably I just like them. But I do love the feeling of serenity that they give me. | Source

Perhaps we can learn to like someone.

Some find it very easy to meet someone new and get to like them. If we look for similarities rather than differences this is easy to do. And if we just love diversity then even in our differences we find that we can like someone right away. And we all know that prickly feeling when we meet someone we instantly do not like at all. Right or wrong that is true.

Often we meet someone and at the first impression we do not like them but then grow to like them as we get to know them. It is said that the famous quote is: I never met a man I did not like". That is wrong the quote should be; "I never met a man I could not find something to like about".Likewise the wonderful rule that: "treat others as you would be treated" is only half of the equation it needs to end; "if you were them". You normally do not buy your momma a baseball glove/mitt to show your love.

Different roles.

Have you ever liked your boss? Do you like your parents and do they like you. Too often the answers to these questions are in the negative and that is too sad indeed. It is said that a father cannot be friends with his son. It is said that the Father must be feared. Hogwash. Just because we have differing roles to play does not mean we cannot befriend and like one another. There is a fun story of Johnny Cash recording an album and he befriended the janitor and insisted that the janitor sit in on some sessions to listen. That man became friends with Johnny and Johnny with him. That man was Kris Kristofferson

Because we walk different paths does not mean that we cannot like one another and be friends.

I love all of the creatures

But I do not like to hang out with rattlesnakes.
But I do not like to hang out with rattlesnakes. | Source

Whether you like it or not.

This article was written by Eric Dierker. I reserve all rights to this article and desire no duplication without attribution. On the other hand feel free to share the content just let folks know where it came from. Copying it and claiming it as your own would be stupid and subject you to my legal harassment of you. Besides if someone asked you what it meant you would not know so yes it is copyright protected as original work by me. Just leave a comment to ask to use it elsewhere and please share it.

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    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dana it took my brother and I 50 years to just accept we do not like each other. But we still love each other and so we deal with it. I would say it broke my heart at first.

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 3 years ago from LOS ANGELES

      I have a relative who I love, but as we grew older I started noticing things about their character I didn't like. One day I had to admit to myself that although I love this person with all my heart and soul, if we weren't related I probably wouldn't deal with them much because I realize I really didn't like them.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      He hangs right on a wall as the first thing when you open the door to my home. I need that mercy. Thank you ologsinquito.

      ps. really enjoyed you piece on liars.

    • ologsinquito profile image

      ologsinquito 3 years ago from USA

      Eric, I love that Divine Mercy picture you selected, of Jesus as our merciful Savior, whom we shouldn't be afraid to approach.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      In general I must agree completely. But I love my brother and do not like him very much at all. We are so different in so many ways.

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 3 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Well written, thought provoking hub!

      I think to love someone, one has to first start liking that person. We may like so many people, but we may not love all of them!

      Its a bit confusing and now I must do some thinking!!!


    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      John, I miss use the terms. I think I wrote this to try and get it straight for me. But by the end I was just plain old confused ;-)

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      DDE, thank you for your comment. If you have both that is a real treasure that we should hold onto.

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      I like this hub Eric, no I love I like written, and well expressed.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 3 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Wow! Incredible about Like and Love. It is normal to feel both how one expresses themselves directly to another is entirely up to them.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Dora for your wonderful comment. I really like how you put it. I rings true for me too.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      I'm with Bill; cheap talk cheapens the sentiments. Anyway, for me love is a requirement. I love--that is respect, honor, take interest in etc; but when I like people I long to be with them. Thanks for dealing with these two important expressions.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      What a great addition to this hub Bill. I call those expressions "boilerplate". Interesting how we can grow to like and even love one another right here on HP.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 3 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Most definitely! What bothers me, today, is the cheapening of these two emotions/expressions....I luv ya! Love ya's like people are afraid to say I LOVE YOU.....or express I REALLY LIKE YOU.....we need to toss aside our protective layers and get real.