ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

If Someone Doesn’t Appreciate Your Presence, Make Them Appreciate Your Absence!

Updated on April 8, 2018
Pam Morris profile image

Writing is my passion. I have an undying thirst and quest in the field of writing.Some eat, smoke, drink or use drugs when stress, I write.

There are people in the world that will bring negativity into your life and not appreciate you, so they do not deserve to have the privilege of your presence. We have all been there - feeling victimized by the peoples we love the most, individuals who treat us poorly or unfairly. All the same, being appreciated by others should be the way we all live and behave. Unfortunately, it is not always the case, and people who are over-giver or nice to others are taken for granted.

When you allow people to take advantage of your niceness, it can lead to a feeling of hopelessness and support the false belief that you don’t deserve respect. It is time you stop ranting and raving because even when you do it all to no avail; it is time to put on a firm attitude. Learn to truly value your life as it is okay to be a good guy or a girl, but a person who is friendly one-day, sulks and withdraws the next means he or she needs boundaries. Set some ground rules to use your discretion and firm up whenever it is required.

An over-giver and a caring person are someone a self- centered person will never appreciate and they do not deserve to have the privilege of their presence. Self-centered people know the things that will make them happy, but they do not always understand what they have in a friend until they are gone. When a selfish person is too busy being blind to appreciate, your presence grants them, the absent, they deserve and befriend somebody who will maintain an even balance of you; a matcher. After all, people who are often blind to the truth have not gained the knowledge to see themselves objectively.

You can’t make anyone appreciate your absence any more than you can make them appreciate your presence. However, you can give them the opportunity to appreciate your absence. ~ Jahfree Harp

Are You an Over-Giver? A Person Who Give Too Much

An over-giving feels onerous because it is a one-way flow of energy. Are you an over-giver; a person who gives too much? Let’s define an over-giver? What is an over-giver? An over-giver is one who gives, and give and give and give and even when not, able they provide some more, the ones who give too much. An over-giver is usually under-appreciated and taken for granted. Be that as it may, it is not that giving is a ‘bad thing’ – it is far from that – but giving when you do not have usually caused great harm and No value to you.

Consider the following details to help you determine whether you might be giving too much:

  • You find yourself putting the needs of others before your own
  • If you are not able to “give” the way you would like to, you find yourself apologizing excessively
  • It’s possible you might be giving because you want to feel admired, loved, or fond of.
  • You see yourself providing and being the giver in almost every relationship.
  • You feel guilty when someone gives something to you, and you are uncomfortable at the thought of asking for something

After reading the above details, if they identify you as an over-giver, your over-giving is not healthy. And if you continue to give, it will leave you in a situation that will leave you feeling emotionally empty.

Never take anything or especially anyone for granted. Life can change in an instant, and leave us full of regret!

On the contrary, although giving can be a ‘good thing,’ it is a ‘bad thing’ when a person gives to ‘keep’ people around him or her. An individual who gives too much does not have limits or have not set boundaries. He or she generally offer too much in the wrong situations and to a corrupt person who will only step all over them like a doormat.

If you are an over-giver and wondering where to start in stopping, it is time you begin the search to stop doing these dodgy preventative measures. Moreover, since it no way to go cold turkey all at once, but you need to stop over-giving immediately, you can start with reducing, but bear in mind when you are over-giving you are giving away your self-esteem and dignity, and when you are giving it away, you are giving too much.

Life is too short to waste your time on people who don't know how to value your time and most of all — your big kind heart as well as appreciates you. Also, now, if you are providing with a view that the other person will attribute the same value that you do in your giving, you are in search of an ‘unfavorable outcomes,’ and all your excessive giving only means, you are giving too much.

If people truly care about you, they’ll value every second of you!

Now that you in search of a solution, the most valuable thing that you can do for yourself is to set boundaries and start making sure that you start getting the love and respect from everyone that is around you. After placing limitations and withhold giving too much to other people they will not regard you as a useful, valuable contributor anymore.

That may leave you feeling ‘scared’ now that you are thinking of stop giving. It also may leave you wondering where to go from ‘here.’ More than likely you are feeling ‘bad’ about stop giving, and at times it may be hard to say NO. Besides, you might even feel guilty as if good people do not know how to say no, you may even find yourself feeling as if you are letting other’s down learning to stop giving and walking away.

It is time to start getting something back in return and offset this liking to over-give, begin by thinking regarding what over giving are doing to you. Know that generous giving feels light and so joyful, it’s important to see how the tendency to over giving can result in feeling depressed. Although most over-givers are incredibly caring by nature and have exceptionally kind hearts, that’s the generous part. However, the trouble comes because you have difficulty setting limits and the takers have problems seeing how gracious you are. Finally, if this is something you find yourself tangled up in— whether it’s at work, in your community, with your friends—you might want to practice retaining from a tendency to over-give.

There’s an old proverb that states, “Sometimes it takes sadness to know happiness, noise to appreciate the silence and absence to value presence,” do you agree with this saying?

See results

Your Presence is Heaven to Me Israel Houghton *NEW VERSION*

© 2017 Pam Morris

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • mulberry1 profile image

      Christine Mulberry 

      2 months ago

      I don't think I fall into the category of one who gives too much typically, but I've certainly experienced someone who didn't appreciate my presence. It took a little time, but I realized he needed to have the opportunity to appreciate my absence. A decision I will never regret. That lack of appreciation will steal your self worth and your soul.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)