If You Have Nothing Nice To Say...
Think before you speak
Unless you have something nice to say, then say nothing at all. Trust me, it's humanly possible!
If at any precise moment you want to say anything other than something nice, simply DON'T. There are many ways around it.
Why hurt someone's feelings, what purpose does it serve? Unless you are intentionally trying to be hateful, just zip your lips. Try your best to keep your comments to yourself. Better yet, write the comment on a piece of paper and then toss it in the trash. Or burn it.
It's so much more pleasant to offer constructive criticism then to ridicule someone. When a person belittles a person, it's actually that person who looks bad.
What purpose would it serve?
Here are some questions to ponder before you say something that you might regret.
- Is what you are about to say a fact and do you have proof to back it up?
- Will your statement help the situation or make matters worse?
- Will someone be embarrassed or ashamed?
- Is it possible that a relationship will be in jeopardy if you say what you aren't sure you should say?
- Is it kind?
- Is it absolutely necessary?
- Should I just be kind and be quiet?
- Will what I say matter 5 minutes from now?
- Am I prepared for the repercussion in case someone gets irate?
Your friend gets a new hairstyle, she's thrilled, you don't care for it....even if she asks your opinion DON'T voice your total opinion, take baby steps around it.
If you don't like the style say something nice about the color or ask who the stylist was because you are looking for a new one and then lose the phone number! This is her time to shine, don't ruin her moment.
Your neighbor painted their house a bright yellow and you fear the value of your house just plummeted. They ask if you like the new color, just suggest they add some black trim. The next time you order pizza just tell the delivery person your house is located right next door to the giant bumble bee. Don't fret, the color will fade.
You read an article that differs from your opinion. Don't judge the writer or critique them. It's their opinion. Artists are all unique. Their views differ from yours.
Can you imagine if we all had the same opinions or perspectives....BORING! Their photos might be a bit offensive, but it's still their creation and should be respected.
Instead of critiquing them how about looking for one positive aspect to the hub and offer them a compliment for that.
When this practice is repeated often enough if becomes a habit. Better yet, you can say nothing. Just hop on to the next article.
Some suggestions you could use in everyday life...
- Bite your tongue
- Walk, skip, gallop, or hop away
- Say something positive instead
- Offer a compliment regarding something else
- Change the subject
- Yell "THE SKY IS FALLING" and run for cover!
- Belch as a diversion!
- If you are in person begin dancing and clapping blame it on a song stuck in your head
- Pretend you forgot to purchase new batteries for your hearing aid
- If you are on the phone make a crackling sound to mimic a bad connection
- If it's on email, Facebook or twitter don't respond for awhile and pretend your computer crashed
Sunshine sometimes practices what she preaches, but most of the time she doesn't need to. It's unlike her to actually cause a diversion or not say anything. She likes to compliment others. She likes to make people smile.
She goes above and beyond to show appreciation when someone does something that impresses her or for any simple act of kindness. We might not think that a small token of gratitude such as a thank you, you rock or you are awesome could make someones day or possibly their week.
Sunshine likes to talk and offer opinions. Her daughters taught her that if she has nothing nice to say then say nothing at all. The majority of the time she's not quiet because that's not how she rolls.
Peace, love and happiness is so much nicer then bickering and hurtful feelings. Go forth and start a new habit. Chances are you probably already are and that makes Sunshine smile.
Do you think before you speak?
© 2011 Linda Bilyeu