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In dealing with Sociopaths...

Updated on October 17, 2013

You Never Know who You're Meeting.

Every day in life you meet/see at least one new person and maybe you end up talking to them or maybe you both just walk on by. But what if the person you saw or met just happened to be a sociopath, and just maybe you caught their eye. Well they're going to talk to you and do as much as they can to get involved in your life and it won't be until later that you'll realize that there is something off about them, or you'll just think that they're just difficult. But that person you met today just could be a sociopath but on the other hand if all goes for the best they're just your average person wanting to be your friend.

How would you know who it is?

Sociopaths look just like everyone else and they blend in so really how would you know who a sociopath is, maybe you haven't met someone who is and maybe you have. A Sociopath is a very complex person, they have a crafty way of thinking. When you learn about their behavior and the way they think, you yourself, begin to think as well. As I did, I was like, "Hey, this sounds like someone I know," and as you do you start to realize who this person is in your life, you begin to think of their behavior and how things begin match up and begin to make sense. Then you'll read about them here and your questions about them will have finely been answered. But the remaining question you will have is, "how do I act around this person, how do I avoid becoming a victim of their mental illness?" It is somewhat simple and hard at the same time, but it also depends on, who this person is and what role they play in your life. You basically have to be sly and very careful as to what information you let them know about you and your everyday life, especially secrets, that's usually when they jump at the chance to store that information and use it to attack you later. They are the same to other people, they will be friends with whoever and will use their good charisma to become fast friend with them and will lure secrets out of them, in most cases they won't even like the person, they just need to be the center of attention. Until it gets messy, they usually find other people to blame. You most likely won't know this person is a sociopath when you meet them but as soon as you read the facts about them, you'll have a good idea as to who they are, but you're obviously not going to jump to the conclusion "Hey, you're a sociopath!" when you first meet someone who is.

Knowing the Sociopaths

  • Superficial charm.
  • Pathological Lying. Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities.
  • Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.
  • Manipulative and Conning.
    They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.
  • Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt.
    When a normal person would be upset or angry they remain calm and unmoved. They will often fake emotions just to make themselves look as if they were like everyone else, and to hide the fact that they have almost absolutely no emotion.
  • Poor behavioral controls/Impulsive Nature. Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as creating hopelessness in the victim. Believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.
  • Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
  • Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility.
  • Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle.
  • Irresponsibility/Unreliability. Not concerned about wrecking others lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.
  • Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency.


Who In your life do you believe is a Sociopath?

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When that person is part of your Family

There are many people who are indeed sociopaths but it always seems to be the hardest when this person is part of your family especially if they end up being one of your siblings. When they're your siblings or even your child you are puzzled and you can't figure out why they act the way they do, you're always thinking, "what did I do?" or "why are they like this?". The hardest might be when its your own parent and you can't really tell them that you think they are a sociopath, who knows, how they may react, or maybe they already know and will just deny it. Some people will just tell you they're a sociopath and others will give it everything they got to keep it a secret. But when you have to live with that individual for years and years and you have to endure the way they act, you just may think its the end of the world and, in some cases when it's a sibling you just have to talk to them as little as possible, if the sibling that is a sociopath is severely mentally ill. And it works to not talk to them very often, even though you're under the same roof, the house just seems to be more peaceful, but when living under the same roof you'll have the chance to learn how to look out for these certain individuals.

Don't let your guard down.

When someone in your life is a sociopath and they have done you wrong and you decide right then and there that you're done with them and if they decide they need you for something else, they'll usually come back and ask what's wrong and tell you that it was your fault even though it was clearly there's to begin with, and they tend to do nice stuff for you and you will begin to go back to the old routine with them and soon after that happens they'll do you wrong again, and again and again. You're the one who is going to have to leave them and stay away or at the least stay very distant from them.

When they get caught...

When sociopaths know they're getting caught for lying, they tend to find someone else to blame so they are able to keep themselves looking like a good person and when all that fails they tend to be very "emotional" (making themselves cry and making themselves out to be the victim,) or have no emotion at all and when they do they let themselves unravel and you will get to see the real them for a few moments until they realize what they just did and they will quickly put their mask back on and they will seem almost too calm about the situation. And most of the time they seem to just get violent, their eyes get crazy and cold, and they give you the death stare, that's when you think they're going to jump up and attack you at any given moment. You just have to remember that they do these things to make themselves out to be innocent victims and you just have to stand guard and prepare for anything when you are confronting them with a lie they told or if they did something and are saying different.

Type Of.
Percentage of general Public.
Ability to Kill.
Sociopath
4%
Most sociopath's don't but they have the ability to kill without feeling remourse or guilt.
Psychopath
1%
Most Psychopath's do kill and there are the few that do not.

Don't underestimate their potential to ruin your life.

Now that you know and have gotten a good idea on who a sociopath is, you can now watch for who in your life is a sociopath, and I'd have to say it isn't at all easy to have them in your life. And you just have to go with all the facts and just keep in mind that they use yourself against you. When you become friends with them your life just gets 10 times harder from that point on and they're better to just not get involved with. But that isn't saying you can't be friends with them, you certainly can be friends with a sociopath you just need to be a little weary around them and you'll have to just watch your back. When you're going to tell your friend/relative a secret and they are the one who is a sociopath you'll just need to think about it for a little while and make sure this wont be a secret that they can use a against you.

My sister.

For years I had wondered what was wrong with my sister. I had just thought she was mean and wasn't very fond of me and or my other sister. But the older I got the more I realized and come to find out she indeed is a sociopath and I now watch every word the escapes my mouth. I still do live under the same roof as her but there is days that I don't talk to her and it even makes me uncomfortable to look her in the eye. So I have first hand experience in living with a sociopath and it is very difficult. But I hope for everyone else out there, you'll realize who the sociopath is, in your life before you become too close.

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    • DzyMsLizzy profile image

      Liz Elias 3 years ago from Oakley, CA

      We unfortunately got tangled up with one of these types about 8 years ago...it got very messy. Others who knew him overheard him bragging, "I don't have to work very hard because I make most of my money suing people." But, when we, ourselves ended up in court because of this idiot, those people were afraid to come forward for fear of retaliation. And, we suspect he was capable of buying off the judge, because he was 100% in the wrong, yet we lost. It cost us over a grand we did not have to spare to get him out of our lives.

      As well, it sounds as if you've described about 75% of the American Congress!!!

    • Minnetonka Twin profile image

      Linda Rogers 3 years ago from Minnesota

      Useful and informative article on the personality of the sociopath. Unfortunately, I have known a few, and they make life very difficult. Thanks for educating others on what to look for, so they know what they are dealing with.