- Mental Health»
- Stress Management
Keep off stress!
Dale Carnegie and some quotes.
Remain Happy irrespective of the circumstances!
Before posting this hub, i would like to introduce myself since my experiences will definitely help most of the people who are in the same category!
I have undergone testing times during my younger days due to stressful situation prevailing in the family. Every one in the family suffered a lot due to the ill health of my mother who was bed ridden for around forty years of her life. She was suffering from sleeplessness, depression etc.,which is enough to create a very gloomy atmosphere. I am from a middle class family. We had just enough resources for basic essential necessities not more nor less. The expenditure on medicine consumed a good part of my father's salary. I had one elder brother and three younger brothers. Somehow it so happened that for the majority part of my life, i had to bear the responsibility of bringing up my younger brothers as well as assisting my grandma in house hold cores including washing of cloths etc.
I used to purchase most of the items for the house hold including vegetables etc., In a way, i was in a bitter situation. Neither i could move out of the responsibilities nor bear it gladly.I was hardly 15 years at that time and i was pursuing pre-university course. Though i wanted to study, the circumstances in the house was against working hard in studies. Hence i was just able to scrap through the course with minimum marks for pass.
The sufferings made me to ponder for the reasons and solutions. But i had one good habit. I used to pour through philosophical books at that young age. I was interested in saints and sages of yore. In fact, I loved the prophets and saints from all religions. This made me to enjoy reading religious, spiritual and philosophical topics. Shirdi Saibaba attracted me and i started relying upon him for all my needs.
During that time, I came across two beautiful books penned by Dale Carnegie. It was really a boon for me. "How to stop worrying and start living and How to win friends and influence people". These two books made a lasting impression in my mind and conscious. Initially Dale Carnegie was a failure as salesman. But he innovated one thing. He started brooding why he failed miserably. One day he thought of a plan. He started keeping records in a folder and he named it aptly; "Foolish things i have done". He made a vow not to repeat the same mistake once more. Though the record added up to a good number, one fine morning he found that he had become successful in his career as a salesman and he has started a institute in his name to train the people! Because of the practical nature of the course, it was an instant success.
Though he earned a lot of fame and fortune, he always shared his experience through books, newspaper and radio programs. His followers grew in amazing number. He instilled confidence in his students who were actually employees in several organizations. One thing he emphasized in his courses is 'SINCERITY'. Though many books have been written on the above subjects, his books were translated in major languages of the world and many millions copies were sold.
I read them with interest and started applying a few of his instructions. Though i had not become perfect yet, i can swear that every one can keep off stress by following few cardinal principles of life.
1, Do not expect success in any career in the first instance itself. We have to commit many a mistakes involuntarily and we should search for the ways to correct the mistakes. Do not repeat a mistake second time.
2. Be honest to accept your mistakes. But do not brood over it. Instead, try to improve your working culture.
3. Do not hanker for praise from the seniors. Be sincere in your work. Do not calculate the effort vs results. We have to learn many lessons only after falling several times. Do not get dejected of failures. They are really the stepping stones for success!
4. Do not forget to thank those who give a lending hand in times of need. Thank them liberally and sincerely.
5. Avoid arguments of any type. It won't help any. Do not criticize any in the face. If you had to point the mistake of others do it politely without hurting their ego. Make them understand that 'err is human' but it should not be repeated once more.
6. Be humble always. Smile a lot sincerely. Yes it should not be a restricted to the lips. Your smile should make the others to smile back. Even if you find some rare qualities with humble people, express your appreciation. Make them understand 'you mean what you tell.Every one in this world has a special talent. But we have to note it and appreciate it at once.
7. Ego is the biggest obstacle in family as well as in career. Hence be humble. Talk politely and encouragingly. Offer seats to the elders and listen to their advice.
8. Do not be talkative, Observe silence. Listen more. Let the other man speaks. Listen intently and sincerely to his view points. Respect all opinions. If you are a theist, you need not cross swords with atheists. They have many other good qualities which you may like to adopt.
9. Love generously. Do not differentiate between persons. All have some unique qualities which need appreciation. Tell people; "I care for you. What help i can do? Offer food, drinks and cloths to the needy.
The above points have some philosophical under currents. 1. God resides in all beings. We should respect all since all are embodiment of God. Help Ever; Hurt Never!
What we are today is the result of what we were yesterday. Every action begets equal reactions. If you sow mango seed today, you will reap sweet mango at a later day. Nothing is an accident. Every thing is incident. Whatever happens, accept it gladly as the will of God. God is not a tyrant. He is a teacher of Truth. Sometimes we have to undergo harsh times. Do not brood or resist those misfortunes. Every thing will pass!
However much we hoard or gather, we can not take even a sand grain after death. Every thing has to be abandoned here itself. Hence develop detachment to the things of the world or persons closely related to you. Every one will leave at their own time. We can not prevent. Be happy always since we can not change any thing or any person in the world. Real happiness comes from within the self and not from outside. Treat the life as a game and play your part well.