ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Letting go of the past when it is not easy to do

Updated on February 2, 2013

letting go of a wound that was chronic

where we've been, to where we are going
where we've been, to where we are going | Source

Healing the wounds


healing from within
Steps to Freedom

How common is that we hear, " just let go of the past?" " Stop living in the past?" or ""forget that stuff, it was twenty years ago.?" We know that this is a valid statement, but somehow deep inside us we realize that something is just not right, doesn't feel right, and we may get a gut instinct about certain topics or events of the past.

healing the wounds that bind



These instincts we feel are trying to tell us something. They are indicators that there is something we are storing inside, our mind, our hearts, or even our body cell memories. Like a flashing light,
it can be a signal to point us to where we need healing. Some of us may have only three to five areas to address, and some of us may have been storing them inside for years. The grief, and pain, so deep that is affecting our mental, emotional, and physical health. Holding onto this pain has a real effect on our relationships with others, and how we interact in general socially. I found that we can be truly free of the past in terms of pain, but that it takes a lot of patience, and a lot of hard work.

Seeking the help of a counselor is recommended so we can feel safe to approach issues if we have had trauma or have been in abusive situations in life. The old saying that it may get worse before it gets better is also true. Sometimes we have a lot to actually grieve over, and release, as well as get a healthier perspective on, to free ourselves from things like shame, guilt , unwarranted blame etc. For me this was a very painful journey as i had to learn to rid my soul of unhealthy family dysfunction, in order to move on in life, with a truly fresh start. I encourage anyone who is in emotional pain, or agony that they can't quite define, or wonder why they are repeating harmful patterns in life, to seek help, start slow, be patient. In time you can heal and let go of the harm of the past, and hang onto the good the golden nuggets of our past that will allow us. Our future is dependent upon the ways we find, to process the wounds we never had the time to deal with, setting ourselves and others free, is a fantastic feeling.

Please submit a comment in the box below the ads. Share your thoughts and ideas. Thank you, am looking forward to hearing from you.


If you have some unresolved issues, and would like help, I'd be happy to share with you the steps I have taken to heal, clear and resolve these past issues.

Leave me a message and I can find a way to contact you.

I also do two free counsel sessions, for Highly Sensitive persons.

Thank you.

Do you find that you need healing of your past?

Are you struggling to close past issues in your life?|

See results

looking ahead, after looking back

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • jaydene profile imageAUTHOR

      jaydene 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Thank you so much for your comment Faith. Yes one day at a time, and leaving the past where it belongs. moving forward with hope and courage :)

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 

      5 years ago from southern USA

      jaydene,

      Thanks so much for this heartfelt hub here. Things from our past surely can eat away at us and harm us here in the present. It is very difficult indeed, especially harmful words spoken that just seem to stick in one's mind. I appreciate the advice you have shared here to help others. We must realize the past is just that, the past, and we can do nothing to go back and change anything that has already happened, but we can move forward in this day, one day at a time, and allow healing to take place.

      Excellent write here

      Voted up ++++ and sharing

      God bless you. In His Love, Faith Reaper

    • jaydene profile imageAUTHOR

      jaydene 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Stina, I admire you for getting help with these issues, as even though it can hurt, it is so worth it to learn to let go of the past, once we can reframe it , in time we can accept and move on with as clean slate as possible ;)

    • Stina Caxe profile image

      Cristina 

      5 years ago from Virginia

      Great Hub. I definitely struggle with past issues that I can't let go and I am currently in therapy trying to manage these memories and stop them from controlling my present-day thoughts and feelings. Good advice!

    • jaydene profile imageAUTHOR

      jaydene 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Hi thank you for stopping in, there are some advice out there that is a bit radical for sure. We all have to do it in our own way, that works, I have also read many books that didn`t make any of this easier,. One thing I know for sure is that it is good to get rid of toxic relationships.

      and hang on to the good ones, that make you feel better. it is a tough journey, but it is amazing how much the past can pile up in us. without our knowing it ;) THE codependents classes gave me only so much also. so i do know what you mean there ..... Let me know if anything special you did helped the most....

    • Oscarlites profile image

      Oscar Jones 

      5 years ago from Monroeville, Alabama

      You seem to be right on.. yes.. I read about 15 self help books after the wreckage and then almost a year of codependents class which i didn't buy all of it, but also i didn't agree with getting rid of everyone in your world like dr. cloud and john townsend suggest either.. and hard for me to be from mars, mr gray. .. haha thanks for the tips.. i could always use the help.

    • jaydene profile imageAUTHOR

      jaydene 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Hello Ed, thank you for stopping in. When I visualize the stairway, I am going up the stairs, and leaving the past behind. the top of the stairs to me represents going forward. and starting again. I was born on an ocean side town, and will always love the water. :) thanks again

    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 

      5 years ago

      If I could step onto that stairway to the sea each day , I would forget the entire world , say nothing about the past ! Thank you for the advice ! Write on my dear !.......Ed

    • jaydene profile imageAUTHOR

      jaydene 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      So true, we need to pack our past away, and not take it with us on our journey into the future. We can never change the past, but yes learn and go forward :)

    • jantamaya profile image

      Maria Janta-Cooper 

      5 years ago from UK

      My life philosophy is that, our life is much too short to live in the past. The past is gone and we can't change it. We should learn from the past and move on. We live just now; not in the past and not yet in the future.

      Your hub is helpful for everyone who needs to realize it.

    • profile image

      nabil bouyki 

      5 years ago from kentra maroc

      Thank you for technical education and technology will be is great will spread in the world

    • jaydene profile imageAUTHOR

      jaydene 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      yes , i do realize that there are somethings, physical that cannot be healed. but they can be somehow transformed through acceptance. I am so glad that you have more good than bad. Seeing it clearly is so important, especially on those not so good days. let me know if you wish to expand on your experience.... it's a great community and i feel we are all here for each other. Thank you Mhatter99.

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 

      5 years ago from San Francisco

      Thank you for this. My illness makes it impossible to escape my past (memories are real for me). Fortunately I have more good than bad.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)