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Life's Struggles - How They Can Make You Appreciate the Good Times.

Updated on April 17, 2015

Life's Struggles

Life doesn’t come with an instruction manual and truthfully, I’m glad it doesn’t. The bad days make the good days better . It is the mistakes that we make, those paths that we take that help build our character, make us strong and see us through the hard times. If I didn’t have a rough day every once in a while, the good days would mean much less. If I didn’t have an argument with my daughter, the hug that we share afterwards wouldn’t have the same effect.

When the hard times come- it is very difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel

My first child was stillborn in March of 2004. The memory of holding his fragile lifeless body is still so clear, as well as the feeling that life had just come to an end. For months I carried his picture everywhere, as though I needed proof that he existed. I didn't know how I could deal with the pain of losing him on a day to day basis. My heart was buried with him, and part of it still is. However, one fateful day I became pregnant with my daughter and I started to see a small light at the end of my tunnel. It wasn't an easy road, my marriage, my friendships and my health all suffered, but in the end I became a new person again filled with hope, and a memory that would help make me a better mom.

Time does help to heal- and love can bring us hope.

The pregnancy I had with my daughter was a stressful experience, but once I was able to hold her part of my heart healed. She did not replace my son, but she gave me hope, hope that I did not experience until I held her. That is what life is about, HOPE. We cannot experience full happiness unless our lives have been touched by some sort of sorrow or disappointment.

Not every obstacle is created equal, but how we cope can make all the difference.

Of course not every experience is as painful as losing a loved one. However, there are people who have lived through it and become beacons of light and hope that there is life on the other side of that pain. I have a great friend who lost her amazing fifteen your old son to a hit and run driver, she carries on his memory through her photography. She is a brilliant photographer and is able to give so much love and hope to the people that she creates priceless memories for. I admire her strength and her ability to change the lives of those around her, she has changed mine.

Let it change you for the better

Extraordinary people are usually people who have suffered, they have become strong because they had to. We are all born with an inner strength that we often don't know we have until we have to unleash it. When bad things happen, people will surprise you, love will come from unknown places, embrace it. The only way for us to heal, and to go on living our lives, is to find that strength, and eventually help the next person who needs it. Most of us...... all of us, will need it. Let your experiences change you for the better, don't let your loss ever be in vain, and reach out and give the next person a helping hand.


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    • SamboRambo profile image

      Samuel E. Richardson 

      7 years ago from Salt Lake City, Utah

      Nice emoticon. Is that a tie blowing in the wind?

    • Mandeeadair profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from California


      Thank you for the very nice compliment. I am off to read your hubs on the subject right now. I think a good attitude on life can make a huge difference and it is important to try and sustain that outlook. Thanks for reading :)!

    • SamboRambo profile image

      Samuel E. Richardson 

      7 years ago from Salt Lake City, Utah

      You have great insight! And a great attitude! Your wisdom is like maybe you've lived longer than I have, though I know you didn't because your first was in 2004. I wrote hubs on adversity and appreciating the good for enduring the bad. My main one on that subject is the one about the innocent not really suffering. I voted you up.

    • Mandeeadair profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from California

      Thank you all for reading and the sweet comments. I have known some amazing, unbelievably strong people and learning from their strength, helps me become a better person.

    • FaithDream profile image


      7 years ago from (Midwest) USA

      I totally agree with your statement, "Extraordinary people are the people who through their loss and difficult times, change our world." What a great quote!

    • Rastamermaid profile image


      7 years ago from Universe

      Very well written. Bittersweet and touching.

      Thanks so much for sharing!

      Voted up

    • Ashantina profile image


      7 years ago

      "We cannot experience full happiness unless our lives have been touched by some sort of sorrow or disappointment.." So so true.

      Very reflective hub!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      This is so true, Mandee. How can there be a "happy" without an "unhappy"--a "good" without a "bad"? There would be no way to measure the joy in our lives without something to compare it to. Actually the Bible really hits the nail on the head with this topic. Great hub, as always!!!


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