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Living The Kind of Life You Want

Updated on September 12, 2015

Some people seem to know exactly what they want and how they want their lives to play out. They plot and stay, for the most part, on track and after a time achieve their goals. That is a great thing, however, for many of us, life can feel like a daily grind. The same activities each day with a few different experiences, some good and some bad sprinkled here and there. Obligations, fear and familiarity keep us stuck in a monotonous routine, however, a slow, deep seated sadness slowly creeps up to the surface, from time to time.

It is possible to change your life, to do things that you enjoy and sometimes even earn money doing those things. Possible, but it takes time, effort and some courage to overcome a few obstacles. Change does not happen overnight, but time is ticking anyway, whether you do something or not. You must choose whether you want to try to make change.

Before anything, take some time to look at your life and decide whether you want to actually make changes or improvements. Sometimes everything is generally fine. We just want to vent or complain about a rough patch we are living through. It is good to be clear about motive and reason for undergoing a real change in lifestyle. If you decide this is not just a passing phase and you would like to seriously make a few changes, then you are ready to begin.

Fear is a major obstacle. Fear of change, fear of failure and fear of what your family, friends and co-workers will think. It is completely normal to fear change, but just because you feel this way, does not mean you should be paralyzed. At first, keep your plans and preparations to yourself. Continue to live your live and fulfill your obligations but carve out a little time to contemplate and prepare for change. Instead of disliking your current situation, think and even fantasize about changes you can make. If you can, write down what it is you want to move toward and then think of 3 small steps you can take to start.

Intertwined in fear is the feeling that you do not have the knowledge or money required. Research your interest. Learn as much as you can about it. There is a wealth of knowledge online and in the library. Learn about the people who are doing these things. You will see they are not that different from you. After all they are just people, if they can do it, so can you. If after researching and learning you realize you need to take a class or two, then that is what you will prepare to do. No big deal. That is the attitude you must hold and remind yourself of. Take a hard look at your finances, take steps to reduce debt and increase savings and bring the other members of your household on board. Getting finances in order is a good idea regardless of what you decide to do. Sometimes, out of control finances is the underlying cause of dissatisfaction of life.

Another major issue to confront is your thinking. The thoughts in your head are powerful. “I’m not good enough“ or “this won’t work” or “I am going to fail” are the types of thoughts you have to replace. As long as you continue to fulfill your day-to-day obligations you are free to think and prepare for anything you wish. Listen to your self-talk and pay attention when it starts getting negative. Replace ‘I’m not good enough’ with ‘I’m as good as anyone else,’ for example. Replace “this won’t work”, with “this is an experiment, I will learn from this either way.” Paying attention and changing thoughts is more difficult than it sounds. It requires real effort to identify when you are doing it and correcting it. Pay attention to your spoken words too. Don’t be down on yourself, accept compliments and do not put yourself or your abilities down. Try to maintain hope of a better future and gratitude for the things you have and the very ability to improve your life.

As you plan and prepare you will find it easier to get through the day-to-day life. Knowing that you are taking control and making positive change makes daily challenges or dissatisfaction easier. You may change your end goal or not, it does not matter. What matters is feeling and knowing that you are in control of how you live your life. You are the master of your destiny.


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