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Lonely or Alone?

Updated on December 9, 2015

More and more these days, I find myself feeling lonely and alone. I have learned over time that there is a difference between the two. Both of the feelings are open to interpretation to everyone, as each person you encounter feels them differently. For me, there could be 20+ people in a high school classroom and as everyone would talk to each other before the teacher started teaching, I found myself feeling smaller and smaller; feeling my self-worth plummeting downhill and bringing myself to believe that my friend group is non-existent. Moments like these unfortunately tend to stick in our minds far more often than moments when we feel like we belong. To me; the feeling of belittlement, almost the panic that no one is with you through this life, this is loneliness.

On the other hand, feeling alone is almost the equivalent of being alone. It can become such an intense feeling that you look around in a crowded room and still feel so alone. Or it could be better known as the feeling where you see the world passing by you and you feel like a small piece in this big world that we live in. Those would be the moments where I would start to question my role in the world and second guessing my existence.

In short, neither of these feelings are fun, as I’m sure we can all attest to at some point in our lives. Feelings are like emotions, and emotions aren’t designed to be fun. Emotions are designed to make you feel something with full force; almost as if they give you a ready or not signal, leaving minimal time for preparation or mental processing of whatever is going on in that moment. With those details in mind, we must remember that emotions and feelings are inescapable and they happen whether we want them as a part of us or not.

Although these feelings among others don’t make us “feel good”, we must move forward. We must move forward for ourselves and we must feel all the feelings there are to feel, the key being how we respond to these emotions. We must not give in to giving up and we must remember that you are not actually alone. You can be alone in a room physically, sure. And you are entitled to feeling lonely and alone; don’t let anyone make you think any differently about that fact. Never apologize for the role given to yourself in this world from the higher power of your understanding.

But in reality, you aren’t the only one that has felt these emotions. You own your emotions and no one can take that away from you. Given that, your emotions can be quite similar to others, and in some cases you would never know who you can relate to you. For all you know, that boy sitting next to you in math class may feel alone in his head as the girl standing behind you in line at the grocery store may feel lonely and lost, even if both people in these instances appear to live “happy” lives. You honestly never really know who goes through what and when or why and even how someone is feeling at any given time. You never know anything for sure in this life, but you should know that you are not alone.

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    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 

      2 years ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      It is easy to feel alone, even when we are with others, when we are unsure of ourselves and can't seem to find the energy or confidence to interact with others. I tend to be a listener, therefore, others know very little about me. That makes me feel alone. When I do find someone who, like myself, looks out for the needs of others, it is like finding a hidden treasure!

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