Author W. K. Hayes
Get off the self-pity quick and get happy!
Okay, so I actually had several ideas for more articles in between promising to write one about self-esteem and actually starting to write about self-esteem. Therefore, without any more delays…maybe…I can get on with the importance of self-esteem.
A person with low self-esteem is just as vain as a person who thinks they are all that and a bag of chips. Both are as equally vain and both can destroy a relationship almost as quickly as money problems.
In my time, I have seen guys that looked like cartoons on two legs with some really pretty girls and I’ve seen fairly nice looking men with some rather unattractive women. So, how did that happen? In both cases, love was blind. They seemed to get along great and all was going well at first, making the saying about love being blind, very true. Then, it hits all at once. The girl becomes overly jealous because she notices her friends think he is hot. For the same reason, he starts getting jealous because his friends think she is yummy looking.
Either way, this jealous partner becomes more domineering and controlling. They start asking you: “Where are you going”, "When will you be back”, “Did you really get stuck working late” and, my personal all time favorite, they start going through your personal possessions and digging in your wallet or purse, checking the numbers on your cell phone.
That is when it hits you that the person you love doesn’t trust you and a relationship without trust is dead. Encase you didn’t get that the first time, “A RELATIONSHIP WITHOUT TRUST IS DEAD”. My saying…copyrighted.
Is there anything you can do to help a person with trust issues thanks to a low self-esteem? Trying to change someone is not going to work and having someone tell you they can change is also another great lie. Now, before you say it is possible…it is not, nor should it be. If the person you are with needs to change in some way then they are not perfect for you. After all, true love is acceptance. If you have to change a person…are they really, right for you?
Now, I hope you see what a low self-esteem does to others. So, stop feeling sorry for yourself and dragging others down with you. Instead, take some pride in yourself. If you are overweight, lose the weight. You were not born overweight and there is absolutely no reason to stay overweight unless you are looking for pity. Yes, I am harsh but I believe you have the ability to do anything simply by doing it. If you want to lose weight, become more active. Go for walks and spend more time cleaning around the house. You would be amazed at how much weight you can lose with these two simple steps. You do not need a fancy diet and you really do not need fancy exercise equipment. The only thing you do need is to stop whining, feeling bad for yourself and do something about it. You will not be any good to anyone in any relationship until you do.
You have great potential and I still believe anyone can do anything if, they try hard enough. Besides, taking a walk around the track at the high school, keeping a steady schedule of chores around the house and soon enough, the weight will start to come off.
Now, should your low self-esteem comes from people talking you down and telling you that you were worthless half your life, as they have done me…flip them the bird and get away from those losers no matter what it takes. You are worth everything to this world. Even the smallest choices you make have the greatest influence others, lives. So, kick the weeds out of your garden and follow your dreams up until your final breath. This life is too short to waste it on negative people, which, coincidentally, really do have low self-esteem.
I remember there was one woman I met. She had a sleepy eye that rather threw her looks off center. Even then, she was very attractive and she knew it. Being imperfect had no ill effect on her whatsoever. Do not get me wrong. She is far from vain or prideful but she carries herself in a manner that lets you know that she is very happy with who she is and how she looks.
The point being…love yourself for whom you are. If you do not like something about yourself, that is your problem and you really should not let it hold you back nor should you use it as a crutch for being abusive towards others. You will only isolate yourself and soon realize that no one wants to be around you if you have a poor attitude. So, be happy, think positive and be good to those around you. Do not worry about being overweight or flawed. Instead, focus on being happy and doing the best you can to make others happy too. Always let your best qualities shine through and the world will love you for it. In the past forty years, I have yet to meet a good-natured person that was alone unless they chose to be. Thanks for stopping by and reading my article. Have a great day and remember…be positive. Life is too short.