ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Making Progress with EFT (or: Help! I’m stuck in the elevator of the Healing High Rise!)

Updated on May 14, 2012
Photo Credit:  Mikamatto
Photo Credit: Mikamatto

The way many of us have been taught EFT is to use it to deal with past issues. We resolve many problems that way and it is important to acknowledge and work on them. But eventually you come to realize that there is more to it than that. To a certain extent you (and anyone else involved in coaching or counseling) are colluding with your client in perpetuating the source of problems.

If we are to truly help someone with more complex issues like Social Phobia they need something more than just dealing with a variety of hurts and injustices – some way of totally reframing the way they react with the world so that new disruptions of their energy system do not occur so easily (many of the people who develop social phobias are highly sensitive people for whom the next trauma is just around the corner).

Byron Katie offers one way of creating that change. Her process – simply called “The Work” comes from a radical change that occurred in her that lifted her from a long and deep depression. The effects in clients may involve much more work and a longer period of time, but the process has proven highly effective for many people (and would be even more so if it were combined with EFT).

To greatly simplify it, the method is to ask 4 questions about any issue:

1. Is it true? (Yes or no – if “no” move to 3.)

2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Yes or no.)

3. How do you react , what happens, when you believe that thought?

4. Who would you be without that thought?

There is another part of the process that is helpful with interpersonal problems is the Turn Around. An example would be the statement “My boss hates me!”. You turn it around and say “I hate my boss!” and find specific examples for this turnaround: for example “I avoid spending time with him.” or “I clam up when he’s around” and we would work on these statements and often come to the conclusion that we contribute to this negative situation or may we realize that our boss has his own problems and it may not be “all about me”.

I have found the more I used that process, the more I became aware of how much of my emotional life is an unnecessary overreaction. I am in a futile war with “What IS”. I often skip straight to question #4 and just let go of whatever anxiety I am harboring and I feel an immediate release. I find I have become more in control of my emotional life because I have a tool for letting go of unnecessary worry and dread.

It is not the same as telling yourself “You shouldn’t sweat the small stuff!” or any of the other ways in which we try to shape our emotional reactions by ”trying not to” do something – it is a genuine letting go.

As EFT Master Steve Wells says in his blog:

These 4 questions, followed by consideration of several opposites to the problem thought, which Katie calls the turnaround, can lead you to the realisation that the only thing you can really know is real is what is happening right here right now. And that is all you have to deal with. What a relief to find that what you have really been upset about is just a “story” about what is happening, or a concept or judgment that you have attached to.

The process of questioning your thoughts and focusing on only what you can really know as true can be liberating. As I said to one of my clients recently, you only have to deal with what you have to deal with … and you won’t know what that is until you get there! Everything else is a story…

To read his blog visit: http://www.eftdownunder.com/blog/?p=14

If a client is not making progress, this can be one of the ways to help them move forward and the format can really lend itself to use with EFT.

Byron Katie’s website is www.thework.com

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)