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Top 10 Narcissistic Bullying Tactics to Recognize

Updated on January 8, 2020
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Narcissism: Echo Apologetics, previously Narcissistic Personality Disorder Mother Facebook Resource Page and Echo Scapegoat Recovery Tactics

What part of NO don't you understand? It is a red flag if someone does not respect your boudaries.
What part of NO don't you understand? It is a red flag if someone does not respect your boudaries. | Source

Introduction

This article discusses the top ten manipulative maneuvers narcissistic, bullying abusers use for the adult children of abuse, mobbing and stalking victims, and others to recognize. Adult sons and daughters of abuse, mobbing and stalking victims, and the average unsuspecting person, begin to recognize, identify, and articulate these tactics when you see them in action all up and down the scale of personal relationships, with coworkers, Don or Jane Juan perpetrators, school or workplace mobbers, and multiple perpetrator stalkers.

After these tactics are discussed, being targeted in a workplace mobbing and multiple perpetrator stalking campaign is touched on in this article, but discussed in further detail in future articles. Then, of course, cyberstalking has very much been a part of the stalking campaign, too.

Gaslighting

While trying to report multiple stalkers harassing and hunting you, your children, and even granchildren like human prey, police consistently claim not to know what gaslighting is. This is true even while they are actively gaslighting you.
While trying to report multiple stalkers harassing and hunting you, your children, and even granchildren like human prey, police consistently claim not to know what gaslighting is. This is true even while they are actively gaslighting you. | Source

Gaslighting: Invalidation and Rewriting History

Gaslighting is an insidious form of abuse taken from the 1938 United Kingdom stage play Angel Street, and the 1944 United States movie, Gaslight. This is a must see. Do not let the old black and white style of the movie put you off. Ingrid Bergman won an Oscar playing gaslighting victim, Paula. As you watch the movie, try to identify as much of the abusive, manipulative behavior as possible. Be sure to note that he never lays a hand on her in this abusive relationship, the kind of abuse that may go unrecognized.

Gaslight Movie Review From the Vault

The Don Juan perpetrator sweeps Paula off of her feet as her confidence is undermined and she leaves her singing aspirations behind. The two marry and he talks her into moving back into her childhood home, where everything is just as they left it years earlier when her aunt, a famous singer who was raising Paula, died.

He begins undermining her perceptions, moving things, then when she cannot find them, commenting how forgetful she is. Just like any abuser, he isolates Paula. When she tries to break out of the isolation, he causes a scene at the party.

What Paula does not know is that he is searching in the attic for jewels he did not get years earlier when he killed her aunt. He thinks they are hidden in the attic where he repeatedly goes while telling Paula he is leaving.

Pretense of love quote by the late Dr. M. Scott Peck
Pretense of love quote by the late Dr. M. Scott Peck | Source

While in the attic looking for the jewels he uses the gas lighting to see, and when he does it causes the other lights in the house to dim. When Paula notices it he undermines her perceptions and tells her she is imagining things. As the relationship enters the discard phase, he begins suggesting committing her as the maid (Angela Lansbury's debut) joins in on the gaslighting, causing Paula to have no one to validate her perceptions - which are 100% accurate by the way.

In the movie law enforcement actually does their job, which does not appear to be happening in real life in any effective manner. Actually police consistently claim not to even know what gaslighting is. This is the case in our recent experience even while a uniformed officer is actively gaslighting a stalking victim trying to report criminal activity, with the well-recognized narcissistic smirk perpetrators are often barely able to contain, appearing to be so very proud of themselves.

Reporting Multiple Perpetrator Stalkers

When trying to report multiple perpetrator stalking, police play one game after another, effectively displaying blatant disregard for the victims, their children, grandchildren, other loved ones and friends, identities, credentials, safety, health, finances, careers, income, property, reputation, pain and suffering, and very life. In addition to these games and enduring blatant disregard, police consistently further the stalkers' agenda.

Gaslighting Invalidation: Determined Diagnosis

Dr. Robin Stern articulated three phases of gaslighting in her book, The Gaslighting Effect: Disbelief, Defense, and Depression. Late in the summer of 2019 we published Gaslighting Invalidation: Determined Diagnoses proposing a fourth phase of gaslighting only a couple of days prior to being arrested by Lenexa, Johnson County, Kansas police, who both lied and gaslighted, forcing an involuntary commitment of this author at Shawnee Mission Medical Center, in Shawnee, Johnson County, Kansas, followed by an involuntary injection, followed by literally being held hostage at Behavioral Freedom in Topeka, Kansas for approximately three weeks, including on my 55th birthday, with two blatantly ridiculous misdiagnoses issued by an aggressive, gaslighting "treatment team," when I am 100% mentally healthy, but a stalking victim of many years.

These police departments, as well as any gaslighting or perpetrating officer in a personal capacity, if possible, and these two institutions, as well as the medical personnel involved, need to be held accountable to the full extent of the law. This is at least the third police department, including Kansas City Missouri Police Department and Gladstone Police Department, both in the State of Missouri, to engage in such fourth stage gaslighting, take down behavior in the last two years.

Gaslighting Definition

Gaslighting Definition by Martha Stout, Ph.D
Gaslighting Definition by Martha Stout, Ph.D | Source

Gaslight, the Movie

Gaslight (1944)
Gaslight (1944)
Gaslight is a must-see movie! As you watch, try to identify as much of the abusive behavior as possible.
 

Gladstone Perkins Police Mobbing of Stalking Victim

While homeless due to the enduring incompetence and corruption of law enforcement in the first place, Gladstone, Missouri Perkins invited me to plan on getting in out of the winter elements the winter of 2017/8 every Monday night at their restaurant. The following night Kansas City Missouri Police, four under 40 white males in two cruisers, stalked me to the Gladstone, Missouri, Perkins in the dead of winter at approximately 2:00 a.m., engaged in directed conversation as I entered the restaurant, (regarding a rape while drugged in my Overland Park, Johnson County, Kansas bed, and harvesting of an embryo (as well as eight eggs) during the 2005 workplace mobbing (KCMO) and multiple perpetrator stalking (KCMO, Liberty, MO, Wyandotte, Douglas, and Johnson Counties in Kansas) in which, according to the commentary, police did not want the rapist and stalker, criminally producing children for profit, self-proclaimed Missouri legal counsel of one local police department (KCKPD), as well as self-proclaimed (2005 firm bio) member of the Missouri Board of Bar Examiners, to be embarrassed by his psycho criminal behavior. In 2005 this continued up to Gladstone, MO, over the holidays, at my niece's apartment, with a pregnant woman, presumed surrogate, acting like she was "crazy.") This is the way of the parasitic, off-the-charts psycho criminal cult-like members hunting and stalking innocent men, women, and children around Kansas City, with much assistance from law enforcement.

As I entered the restaurant at approximately 2:00 a.m., one of the four uniformed Kansas City Missouri Police officers engaged in directed conversation, "You f*cked him!" followed by a public disparaging display. Note these four police officers waiting until the minute I stepped foot on the restaurant driveway, to zoom in front of me into the parking lot. In any case, after this confrontation someone, I guess the KCMOPD, called Gladstone Police with two under 40 white males and an under 40 blonde, white female officer responding. They handcuffed me outside the Gladstone Perkins in another public disparaging display, went through my belongs, yelling in my face, manhandling me while in handcuffs with serious spinal injuries, did not place me under arrest, but forced me into a police cruise.

The female officer forced me to St. Luke's Northland Hospital, where I immediately refused medical treatment. It appears this same female was shortly thereafter taking a trip, flying out of KCI, walking right by me at the airport as she did. The electronic commentary was that she jumped at the chance to go on a trip with one main stalker and lawyer. This was a reference to a stalker on a motorcycle previously driving by me on the highway with a "Tommy Bahamas" t-shirt on, then staying just in front and beside me on the road, which is one more example of their way of doing things. These people spent years, six or seven years, after the 2005 workplace mobbing, that repeatedly nearly took my life, during which time I sent him home to his wife, trying to get me to fall for this psycho so they could play their games and prey on us.

Surrounded by Flying Monkeys

Note that even as I type this in the public library, (due to stalker induced loss of three computers among much other personal property) stalkers are playing head games regarding my grandchild crying about reading this. So, if my children, which includes grandchildren, are reading this, I am not planning to die anytime soon. These stalkers tried to kill me in 2005 and again in 2014, still with no known charges, of course. As I responded to their commentary in 2005, "Die! Die! DIE!" I will die when God says I die, not when these murderous cult-like members say I die. God will also keep you in the palm of His Hand. The police certainly are not doing one damn effective thing about any of it. Quite the contrary.

Flying Monkeys Video

Stalkers Issuing Threats Electronically and by Directed Conversation

Perpetrators continue to attempt to issue their either/or cult ultimatums regarding my book/s that they claim to have ripped off while we are still waiting on law enforcement, leveraging harming my child and grandchild, even more than they already have, like the scum of the earth that they are, and as has been the case for years now, still with no effective results from law enforcement.

During the 2005 workplace mobbing and multiple perpetrator stalking, shortly after graduating from law school in my early forties (and no prior symptoms, (just like my late grandfather who had bloodshot eyes the last 18 months of his life) as well as not being hospitalized since giving birth 21 years earlier), it was a threatened ultimatum between my then toddler grandchild and my law degree, with stalkers targeting both.

My children, including grandchildren, are mine, so is my law degree, any causes of action in this situation, my online content, and book/s, my identity, etc. None of their activity, violating criminal and civil law, has resulted in any known charge, restitution, or real opportunity to seek damages even though it was reported to all levels of law enforcement in The Year of the Police Report, 2016.

Source

"Arrest" of Stalking Victim by Stalker Impersonating a Police Officer

Nearly six years walking now due to the loss of my automobile (as well as five sources of income) from stalker crimes on or about May 23, 2014, in which I sustained multiple still untreated physical injuries, after being druggged with 8-12 "mechanical mosquitoes" hitting my back simultaneously and being forced in plastic tie cuffs into an unmarked white alleged police cruiser, taken first to Olathe Medical Center in the late evening, then with the sun coming up, (with satanic ritualistic abuse believed to have occurred overnight, allegedly with my child and grandchildren watching) into what appeared to be a condemned campus, (the arrangements of the buildings did not in any instance match that of the stated campus) where it is believed paperwork was slipped into the actual facility, with the male stalker, known to me as a Missouri attorney, impersonating a police officer.

The plexiglass in the unmarked white cruiser was not factory installed, with gasses being expelled from a tube protruding through the plexiglass, which the main stalker was turning on and off, taking me to Olathe Medical Center but returning paperwork to me from Overland Park Regional Medical Center. Olathe Medical Center and these stalkers need to be held accountable to the full extent of the law. Commentary regarding the inflicted multiple serious injuries included, "Your body is not breaking down like it's supposed to." (2014)

Mobbing by Kansas City Missouri Police and EMTs

While en route from Kansas City International Airport to Nashua, Kansas City, Missouri, on foot, in the dark and the cold of the winter of 2017/8, with these still untreated inflicted injuries, multiple uniformed officers approached me after a white male in an ATA Ride KC Supervisor vehicle with a sheriff vest on pulled up beside me and demanded my driver's license, which I refused to provide him, so he called police. Multiple officers responded, nearly breaking my arms, handing my driver's license to the ATA Ride KC "sheriff," prior to the arrival of an ambulance in which two more white males, with multiple males surrounding me, forced me into an ambulance and to St. Luke's Northland Hospital, where I immediately refused medical attention, but inquired whether they would document my physical injuries, with the response of "no."

Source

Landscape and Stereotypes

Recall that multiple perpetrator stalking campaigns and the like are performed in a landscape in the United States where the insurance industry and the pharmaceutical industry are the two wealthiest industries in this country. Also recall that the Babyboomers retiring and dying is the greatest transfer of wealth in the history of this county, largely due to the 401(k). Keep these facts in mind when reflecting upon those who are greedy, power hungry, perverted, without conscience, empathy, or remorse, and will use or dispose of anyone who gets in their way, or maybe even that they can profit from in any manner.

Stereotypes

Once again I am reminded, as we published years ago, of the elder law case that was quite alarming, and which is articulated based on recollection. Twenty-five or more elderly women between the approximate ages of 75 and 103 years old, who were also dementia or Alzheimer's patients in an assisted living facility, were reporting being raped. No one believed them until someone walked in during an attack by an approximately 30 year old male member of the nursing team. Of course, I do not generally ever have that problem, unless it is a troll.

Sexual Assault

Rape is not necessarily based on what one might deem to be reasonable attractions, so someone being physically unattractive in your estimation is not a valid response. I am reminded, for example, how Jennifer Flowers was taunted and disparaged, including Carville's waving a $100 bill in a trailer park CNN comment.

Unfortunately, today there appears to be even more ulterior motives for sexual assault, such as the production of children, and this also may be such as in the case of "ordering" certain features in a child, but is not necessarily based on the attractiveness of the people involved. Children may be adopted for profit, taken from loving parents or grandparents who are drugged, even conceived and harvested without knowledge by these creatures, there is potentially stem cell research, the destruction of a stalking victim's appearance by stalkers, and many other reasons that may be unthinkable to the average decent human being.

Spiritually, there are those who believe there is nothing that creates an emotional bond, in this instance in order to leverage it against the victim, like sexual intercourse. This belief is held even if the sexual contact is achieved through the use of a date rape drug, such as the one even worse than ecstasy, that it being used to inflict carnage in Mexico, based on past reading.

Stalkers' Echoes Also Echo Through Police Speech and Radios

The main bullying white male uniformed officer claimed he did not want me to "fall and bust my head open," which was received as a threat, as well as believed to be an echo from my late targeted brother, Gail "Bo" Thomas Schrader's death.

Bo's photo was edited to reflect him pushing his sole remaining young child on a trike with a head injury. Bo's firstborn, the late Mercedes Busing-Ong, moved from her lifelong jurisdiction into Kansas City, Missouri, and married shortly prior to dying from the rare disease she had suffered from about half of her young life.

During the 2005 workplace mobbing and multiple perpetrator stalking "2 x 4" was echoed to "4 x 4," to four (of us, my late Grandmother, Clara Marie Mize of Bonner Springs, Wyandotte County, Kansas, my late mother, Marie Francis Schrader of Kansas City, Clay County, Missouri, myself, and my then toddler aged firstborn grandchild, which was after my maternal Grandfather, Thomas Fred Mize's death in July 1, 2001 in a fiery head-on crash (the article disappeared from the Internet after it was articulated a couple of years ago) bye four, echoed repeatedly." Recall that organized stalking campaigns seek to cause homelessness, death, or commitment.

Again, I am completely mentally healthy, and notified all levels of law enforcement of this situation in 2016. In each of these incidents I was doing nothing but walking, (except in May 2014, I was sitting on the bench in front of The Village Inn in Mission, Johnson County, Kansas when both feet were struck electronically resulting in instant, large blisters across both feet) since my car still has not been replaced and my driver's license suspended, which is another theme of stalking victims. I was billed by St. Luke's Northland, where my things were again gone through while a young white male stood "guard" to keep me in my room while openly mocking me.

See more regarding the forthcoming Echo book (should law enforcement ever do their job efficiently enough for it to be written, as Gail also continues to wait to finish her Scapegoat book since early 2014) in future articles, as well as the request for the bar association to make note of this situation, and initiate and accelerate a focused effort to have perpetrating police officers purged from the police force, at a bare minimum, and prosecuted whenever possible, as these police departments appear to be unwilling or unable to clean their own houses.

This is hardly the full extent of behavior by uniformed officers presenting in multiple jurisdictions since beginning to report multiple perpetrator stalkers, as well as some questionable behavior prior to that time.

These cult-like stalkers make a mockery of all that any society holds sacred, including our legal system, then try to force your children to perpetrate against you according to their claims. Our legal system is not bound by the cult thinking of either/or choices of who to protect, and then for as little as 15 minutes at a time, as has been an enduring excuse by perpetrators for years now.

While some claim gaslighting is just another word for lying, gaslighting is much more than that. Notice the symbology of the fog.
While some claim gaslighting is just another word for lying, gaslighting is much more than that. Notice the symbology of the fog. | Source

The Silent Treatment

The silent treatment has been called by John Gottman, one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse due to how destructive it can be to relationships. Therapists often recommend therapy if the silent treatment is used regularly in a relationship. Narcissistic Personality Disorder Mother Facebook Resource Page first moved to Narcissism: Echo Apologetics before that account was ripped off, and is at now at the Narcissism: Echo Apologetics (until this one is ripped off, too, while we continue to wait on law enforcement to do anything other than aid the criminals) has previously distinguished the silent treatment from going no contact with an abusive narcissist, which abusers had tried to claim was no different.

Going no contact with an abusive narcissistic personality is completely different than someone inflicting the silent treatment. When an adult child of an abusive narcissistic parent goes no contact with that parent it is generally for self-preservation after a lifetime of pain. When someone inflicts the silent treatment, it is generally to:

  • control,
  • punish,
  • test boundaries, and
  • avoid responsibility.

Note also the distinction that a cooling off period is not considered the silent treatment. For example, agreeing to discuss something after a 20 minute cooling off period, is not considered the silent treatment.

Have compassion on true victims, not those playing the victim or manipulating with pity. Discernment may be needed!
Have compassion on true victims, not those playing the victim or manipulating with pity. Discernment may be needed! | Source

Playing the Victim While Vilifying True Victims

This maneuver can leave you reeling, especially if you do not recognize it. For example, the abusive manipulator verbally attacks you and tells you to get out of his or her life.You may be hurt and upset, and you might even be waiting for an apology in the months that follow. However, while you are waiting for an apology, the abuser is going around telling everyone you viciously verbally attacked him or her, and they are very concerned about you.

In the days that follow this abuser may even gaslight you by saying right to your face that you viciously verbally attacked him or her and owe him or her an apology. You also might experience a speech from one of the people the abuser tells the fabrication to regarding how you should treat this person better. Playing the victim while vilifying true victims often has the smear campaign, gaslighting, the silent treatment, and scapegoating all wrapped up in one abusive maneuver.

Source
Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers
Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers
Since invalidation is such an issue for adult daughters of narcissistic mothers, this is a great source of validation, which in my personal experience is a big part of recovery. Decades ago it was the "inner child," and the "inner mother" I believe Dr. McBride coins it, in my opinion, is in the place where God should be. Then, there is one exercise in the back of the book that I believe is too powerful to be performed without the assistance of a therapist. This exercise calls for obtaining a doll that looks like you looked as a child. I think this recovery exercise should only be done under the supervision of a licensed mental health professional. Other than that, this is a great resource for adult daughters. Find it here on Amazon or it may be available at your local library.
 

Smear Campaigns

Abusive bullies, pedophiles, and stalkers engage in smear campaigns often spreading slanderous gossip and accusations against their victims, as well as others who see through them. This is just one more thing being stalked by multiple perpetrators has in common with being a childhood sexual abuse victim.

Be on the lookout for smear campaigns that may even go so far as to drug someone then accuse them of being a drug addict or dealing, certainly not even interrupted by police in our recent experience, but also appearing to be aided by law enforcement.

Also be on the lookout for peeping tom videos leveraged to silence and humiliate victims. Stalkers distinctly appearing to go so far as to even lobotomize victims for their "shows," rendering their victims defenseless, and recalling rape and pedophilia involve power issues.

Created on Narcissistic Personality Disorder Mother Facebook Resource Page prior to it being hijacked by cyberstalking thieves.
Created on Narcissistic Personality Disorder Mother Facebook Resource Page prior to it being hijacked by cyberstalking thieves. | Source

Scapegoating

While this term is found in the Old Testament, where the sins of the people were piled on the head of the scapegoat who was sent out into the desert to die alone, there has not been any need for a scapegoat since Jesus Christ died a substitutionary death on the cross.

While stalkers have been known to torment Christians with "the sins of the fathers being visited upon the sons," in this instance when the father was a pedophile and the son was not, each person is responsible for their own sins according to Scripture.

Also note that Scripture dedicates the first fruits to God, which includes the fruit of the womb. In dysfunctional families it is often the firstborn who is designated as the scapegoat, but sometimes it is the second born.

Ever since Adam blamed Eve, and Eve blamed the serpent, human beings have been scapegoating others. In dysfunctional families, such as alcoholic family systems, there is often one or more child who is assigned the role of the scapegoat. Everything this child does is deemed wrong.The very existence of a scapegoat signals someone is chronically avoiding personal responsibility.

This scapegoat is needed in order for family members to appear normal while pointing at scapegoat as the problem. The fury of hell will come down on a scapegoated child who refuses to play the part in some instance and the entire family system will attempt to put them back in their rigid assigned role. This is because the survival of the entire dysfunctional family system depends on everyone staying in their rigid assigned role, as opposed to being allowed to freely develop their authentic self.

Then there is the issue of a cult-like organized effort to force recovered scapegoated children back into their assigned roles allegedly for a lifetime regardless of the mental health, accomplishments, healthy boundaries, or anything else.

Think of it as abusive narcissistic family of origin members or others in an organized cult-like effort, going as high on the spectrum as is required to invalidate this individual and rewrite history, with no effective police protection for the victims. This is not to discourage any scapegoated abused adult child, but to warn of the personal experiences that we continue at Narcissism: Echo Apologetics to articulate, raise awareness about, and advocate for timely, effective solutions for the victims.

Guilt Trips

Source

Manipulation with Guilt and Pity

Manipulation with guilt and pity can be studied in a logic class, and in our experience are favorites of emotional manipulators.

Source

Divide and Conquer

Lower on the spectrum a narcissistic manipulator may play even her children against one another. For example, she may disparage her son to her daughter and her daughter to her son, wanting to be the hub in the middle.

For more divide and conquer tactics used by manipulators and stalkers see future articles because these tactics go way up the spectrum. These tactics in our experience go much higher up the spectrum well into criminal activity over long periods of time. This can even include impersonations of common people, quite convincing ones too.

Famous NPD Cases

The two most famous NPD cases are Brian Blackwell in the UK, and Betty Broderick in the United States. The Broderick case divided a jury, city, and the country.

Brian Blackwell Case - UK

Betty Broderick Case - US

Malignant Narcissists by Dr. M. Scott Peck

The late Dr. M. Scott Peck was a practicing psychiatrist for approximately 30 years when he wrote People of the Lie, and thought he may have treated one malignant narcissist who was even trying to manipulate him. He also stated the damage just one of these people can inflict is only limited by the amount of power they are able to obtain, his examples beginning with parents and ending with the example of Hitler in Nazi Germany and the concentration camps millions died in. As a side note, recall that the United States brought the Nazi shrinks over to the U.S. after WWII, under the pretense of not wanting the Russians to use their expertise.

People of the Lie: The Hope for Healing Human Evil
People of the Lie: The Hope for Healing Human Evil
People of the Lie remains one of the best books we have ever read. The late Dr. M. Scott Peck wrote People of the Lie after his popularity soared with The Road Less Traveled. People of the Lie stands the test of time within the malignant narcissism literature, even though it was said not to be well received by his peers at the time.
 
Directed Conversation Definition
Directed Conversation Definition | Source

Directed Conversation

Directed conversation is something multiple perpetrator stalking groups engage in. This is a way to harass, annoy, interrupt, instruct, or even threaten someone while appearing not to be addressing this person. Even though the ongoing situation has been reported to all levels of law enforcement for four years, after being delayed 3 or 4 months under threat of arrest in late 2015, the directed conversation by trolls often continues daily.

After years of being stalked without any effective response from law enforcement, stalking victims are presented with an endless stream of double binds which can include even the most basic requirements for existence in every aspect of life.
After years of being stalked without any effective response from law enforcement, stalking victims are presented with an endless stream of double binds which can include even the most basic requirements for existence in every aspect of life. | Source

Double Bind Coersion

Double bind coersion is a form of control without open manipulation. It is manipulating without looking like you are manipulating, and it is one of law enforcement's specialties against the stalking victim. It is being put in a damned if you do, damned if you don't, and damned if you say anything about it position. Then, of course, the victim is often left to deal with the resulting anger or righteous indignation from the injustice.

Double bind coercion is being put in a damned if you do, damned if you don't, and damned if you say anything about it position.

Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome

For six days hostages were held in the bank vault at gunpoint after Jan-Erik Olsson walked into Kredibanken in Normalmstorg, Stockholm to rob the back. During the ordeal one of the hostages took up for her capture, turning on police. Even after the hostages regained their freedom, this behavior continued.

Olsson threatened, abused and caused the captives to fear for their lives, but they took up for him. One hostage became romantically involved with the robber. Another established a legal defense fund to help with his with legal expenses.

The term Stockholm Syndrome has since been used to describe this phenomenon, but trauma bonding was recognized by psychology many years prior to the Stockholm bank robbery. Stockholm Syndrome has been found in studies of prisoners, hostages, and abusive relationships, such as:

  • Child abuse
  • Incest survivors
  • Battered woman
  • Prisoners of war
  • Concentration camp survivors
  • Intimidating and controlling relationships

Elements Causing Stockholm Syndrome

Not everyone in these situations develops Stockholm Syndrome, but when it does develop, there are four elements involved:

  1. A creditable threat to psychological or physical survival, with the belief it will be carried out;
  2. Small kindnesses the abuser shows to the victim;
  3. Isolation from anyone but the abuser's perspective; and
  4. A perceived inability to escape.

Symptoms of Stockholm Syndrome

  • The hostage has positive feelings toward the capture.
  • The hostage supports the capture's reasons and behaviors.
  • The hostage has negative feelings toward the friends, family and authorities attempting to assist or rescue them.
  • The hostage displays an inability to engage in behaviors leading to their escape.

Note that "hostage situations" involving multiple perpetrator stalkers, for example, are no longer this obvious, including those involving intrusive, violating technology. Also note that in this author's experience these creatures intentionally orchestrate bonding with their victims during high traumatic times, such as pretending to be your new best friend during a highly stressful event like the death of your mother occurring during a stalking campaign, for which one cannot escape and is surrounded by perpetrators.

This appears to be in order to prey upon the victim in a vast multitude of ways in a "low maintenance" one-way, parasitic "relationship" that in my experience would be beter described as a "hostage situation." For example, the main predator during the 2005 workplace mobbing and multiple perpetrator stalking campaign, pretended to have a crush on me. He dropped deniable and not so deniable crumbs here and there in person, at work, within the greater context of the severe workplace mobbing.

In the years following the mobbing, their intrusions into my electronics and home were allegedly because he had a "crush" on me. Worse yet, it may be presented as the way a stud of power does things, which you just never knew because you have never had such a "man" (not to be confused with healthy, normal "men.")

This is also especially troubling since children of malignant narcissism have so often had such cruel things done to them in the name of love, and are so often unclear on what love even actually is, also generally being "love" for what they do rather than who they are - performance based. Then, of course, the victims it appears is suppose to be so starry eyed that one does not notice what is happening as unspeakable crimes continue to be committed against the victim. Regardless of the carnage, it is always spun around to be a "favor."

See Christine Louie de Canonville for more information about Stockholm Syndrome at Understanding Cognitive Dissonance, Trauma Bonding and Infantile Regression. Also note that Narcissism: Echo Apologetics 2019 is not associated with any licensed mental health professional or organization, except to the extent me quote and link to licensed professionals on our pages.

Brainwashing Elements

Source

For more on cult tactics, see the late Margaret Singer's book, Cults In Our Midst. Hopefully, you can find a copy that has not been rewritten.

Emotional Manipulation

Manipulators who are unable to get the desired response from someone in a logical manner often resort to emotional manipulation. Abusers and stalkers in our experience have great difficulty with reasonable, logical thinking. Multiple perpetrators stalkers have these same dysfunctional patterns in our experience, which is inevitably equally victim-blaming.

So when an abusive bully is unable to manipulate you with reason, they will often present or act out an emotionally charged scenario to get the response they are after. Actually, in our experience, stalkers will resort to whatever means necessary to get what they are after.

When your responses move from logical to emotional, then the puppet-masters believe they are much more likely to get the desired response or to cause you to do something you might not normally do. This also appears to go way up the spectrum. Of course, when all else fails abusive bullies of all kinds generally resort to the threat of physical violence or physical violence itself.

Sealed in the Holy Spirit. Remember that when perpetrating psychos attempt to convince you that you're demon possessed, which is one of their "games."
Sealed in the Holy Spirit. Remember that when perpetrating psychos attempt to convince you that you're demon possessed, which is one of their "games." | Source

As we have noted in the past, there are also those among us who study manipulation and deception. Do not allow the relabeling of sociopaths, psychopaths, or evil in some instances to cause you to believe we have any interest in disturbing the mentally ill, but the criminally predatory.

The late Dr. M. Scott Peck in People of the Lie, asserted that there is a segment of human psychology or psychiatry, that the profession is simply not equipped to deal with or effectively treat.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder, for example, is an Axis II, Cluster B personality disorder, sometimes referred to as the "untreatables" that does not change according to the experts. Those wanting to silence the awareness raised online may attempt to present "evidence" to the contrary. He went on to expand on the idea that this is often left to the domain of the church.

We believe in the rights of victims, and the prosecution of those who prey upon others, regardless of what caused them to arrive at their predatory condition, barring any legal exceptions, blatant disregard of even the basic tenants of the Geneva Convention, or advanced technology specifically designed to overpower the mind and will of the victim.

Source

Spiritual Deception

Bullies seem to love to hide in the church, and way too many Christians still believe if someone says they are a Christian, then they are. Way too many Christians also appear to still believe that if someone is a pastor or teacher, they are exactly what they present themselves to be. This is the case even when the Bible itself warns of false brethren, false teachers, and false prophets. You are to know the Bible for yourself, and test someone before just blindly accepting his or her teaching.

Electronic technology exists, which has been personally experienced, where today's bullies attempt great deception even to the point of trying to convince you they are God whispering in your ear. This also appears to be done year after year without the slightest interruption by police, and with no charges, but attempting to blame the victim.

We always start with the simplest explanation, and YouTube had a very simple video demonstrating the technology. A young woman was sitting in a food court with an open balcony. A man stood on the balcony with a small device. She heard someone talking to her, but did not realize it was him. Then, this, of course, go up from there.

There is nothing some abusive bullies love more than to mislead, deceive, and even torment a child of God. The historical less barbaric methods were mangling of Scripture, and trying to beat someone half to death with the Bible while handing God the blame. Undoubtedly, this still exists today, but with technology added to the mix, as well as organized groups who appear to have been in existence for generations working together and in our experience no charges for the criminals and perverts. Christian persecution is alive and well today even in the heart of America, here in the Midwest.

The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life
The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life
Learn more about gaslighting in Dr. Robin Stern's book, The Gaslight Effect. Find it here on Amazon or in your public library.
 

Conclusion

Be on the lookout for these top ten manipulative maneuvers narcissistic, bullying abusers use, and for the adult children of abuse, mobbing and stalking victims, and others to recognize. Begin to recognize, identify, and articulate these tactics when you see them in action all up and down the scale of personal relationships, coworkers, Don or Jane Juan perpetrators, school or workplace mobbers, and multiple perpetrator stalkers. See Kansas City Workplace Mobbing and Stalking: My Story, for a continuation of this discussion further up the spectrum. The link will be live as soon as the article is published.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Ephesians 6:12

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2019 Kelly Ann Christensen

Share Your Thoughts

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  • KC3Lady profile imageAUTHOR

    Kelly Ann Christensen 

    7 months ago from Overland Park, Johnson County, Kansas

    I guess that would depend on the person and how much they want to invest in and work on the relationship, are to whether or not they choose to search therapy. Ideally, it should be true for everyone in this country that they have free choice of friends, lovers, "deal breakers," boundaries, etc., but unfortunately, it is not.

    Thank you for taking time to read and comment.

  • dashingscorpio profile image

    dashingscorpio 

    7 months ago from Chicago

    "Therapists often recommend therapy if the silent treatment is used regularly in a relationship." - Why not move on?

    Each of us gets to choose our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

    Each of us has our mate selection process/must haves list.

    Each of us has our own boundaries and "deal breakers".

    Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself.

    If something doesn't (feel right) to you it's probably not right for you. No one is "stuck" with anyone! Suffering is optional.

    Life is too short to be trying to change water into wine.

    The goal is to find someone who (already is) what you want.

    "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

    - Oscar Wilde

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