- Personal Health Information & Self-Help
Never Assume Anything
Assuming is BAD!!
Never you fear!
Pros and Cons of Assuming
Keep an open mind
Whenever you're applying for a job and the prospective employer is taking seemingly forever to get back with you, the typical action is to assume one thing or another. 'They just don't like me,' 'they didn't think I was good enough,' 'they found someone else, someone better than me.' These are all typical assuming thoughts and notions that are commonly made out of doubt, insecurity or both. Too often, we tend to assume that something has gone out of our favor and we give up hope. A good way to prevent this is having confidence. ALWAYS go into an interview or a meeting or a contest with confidence and most of the time, you will come out successful. We all have our doubts from time to time, this is normal, but to assume the negative is the worst thing we can do.
Assuming is a common act in the work place, relationships, hobbies, you name it, it happens a lot. To assume is simply to feed into negativity and that is something nobody needs. After all, where does negativity really get us in the end? Not very far. If anything, it makes us subside and fall back on our bums wondering, 'what happened?' NEVER ASSUME THE NEGATIVE! In fact, never assume at all. Let it be, and just have confidence. I can't count all the times I assumed something bad and once I found out all the incontrovertible facts, and I ended up losing my chances with someone I wanted to get to know better, or ruining a prospective job I was after, or screwing up a friendship I valued. Negativity is no body's friend and will ONLY do harm. It is like playing with fire, and coming from a family of firefighters, I can accurately say, no good can come of that.
Let me give you a few tips on how to avoid the assuming route.
Relationships and Dating:
If you are waiting to hear back from your boyfriend or girlfriend after a phone conversation or a text conversation, do not automatically assume they are avoiding you or are up to no good. Most of the time, "things do happen," "things do come up" and "People do get busy." Do not think that they are not interested or are bored with the conversation or bored with you. more often than not, communication is lost because, signals are lost, and calls get dropped. Also you may be waiting for what seems like an unnecessary eternity for a reply to an email. Fear not, most unfamiliar email addresses automatically go straight to spam, which most people do not check and choose to avoid them altogether. If that is the case, they just haven't seen your email and just missed it altogether. Does not mean they are finished with you, it just means that communications have been missed. Do not panic, just breathe and be patient.
If you are awaiting a response to a text and it does not come until hours later or even the next day, if you really care about this person, do not assume anything negative. Just take a mature and understanding approach and let it be. After all, you can send another message and simply politely inquire if they got your last message. No harm done. No muss, no fuss. The repercussions of negative assumption are never ever good. Backlashes will be imminent, forceful reaction will be bestowed upon you, and basically you will get just what you gave. That is just plain Karma.
Job Applications and Interviews:
When you have gone to an interview already, and you were told that you will be contacted about the final decision, depending on what kind of job you applied for, do not always expect them to put their money where their mouth is. They are simply required to say, "We'll call you." it doesn't always mean "we promise." If you apply for a job as a waiter/server, host/hostess, retail associate, cashier, etc., unless you get hired, you will never hear from them again. EVER! However, if you apply for a more prominent job, say at a law firm, or an administrative office or something more prestigious, you will be likely to hear from them again one way or the other. Now, after applying either online, or in person and you do not hear from the firm or office of sort, just give it about a week. If you still have not heard anything from them, call or email simply to follow up on your interview. This display of courtesy will prove persistence, accountability, and professionalism. If then, you still do not hear from said office, do not think the worst, do not assume anything. Just be confident and patient. Then, after another week has past, move on and try somewhere else.
If you have applied for employment at a school, either private or public, and after a week you still have heard nothing, give it a week. If after a week has past and you have heard nothing, then all you have to do is politely and assertively, check in and see what is going on in the decision making process. If then you have heard nothing from them still, trust me, move on. If they actually tell you something like, "You will definitely hear back from us in a week's time" and you hear nothing at all. Don't even sweat it. I know from personal experience, they NEVER EVER keep their word. I don't care what school they are from or at. They never are truthful about anything.
If you are awaiting a call from a friend or acquaintance, and you have yet to hear of a reply, do not fret nor worry. As I have said before, people do get busy. Text messages are not always received even though your phone reads as sent and received. If you send them another message and that also is not responded to, then give it some time to cook, so to speak. A week is a standard wait time, if it has been longer, your assumption is probably accurate. After all, people do change, right? Aside from people changing, minds and opinions change as well, which only makes situations like this so much more complex. The overall consequences of assuming can potentially be costly. relationships can be tainted, friendships ruined, and the receiving end of the assuming thoughts can be hurt. They can even throw away the relationship for good, whether it be platonic, romantic or business relationships. Assuming something when you do not have all the facts is the worst thing you can do.
As the old saying goes, 'assuming makes you an ass.' Just have patience, occupy yourself accordingly and responsibly, and try to have a confident, positive attitude and outlook.