ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Pregnancy After Stillbirth or Miscarriage

Updated on October 11, 2012
Source

Coping with Pregnancy after Pregnancy Loss

My first born son was stillborn. I gave birth to him only hours after multiple ultrasounds indicated he no longer had a heartbeat. The hospital room was cold, my mind was hazy and to this day it still feels like a bad dream. I wanted more than anything to be a mother, but after losing my baby my fear of another pregnancy was almost unbearable.

Four months after I gave birth, I found myself pregnant again, and although it was a very stressful experience at times, it ended up being a positive experience. I have a two beautiful children and a new outlook on life that was given to me from my first pregnancy.

Dealing with the Fear of it Happening Again

Getting through a pregnancy after a stillbirth or a miscarriage is no easy task but there are ways to cope that I learned along the way.

1. Rent a Fetal Doppler. For many people hearing their baby’s heartbeat every couple of days is very reassuring. If I didn’t have a doppler during my second pregnancy I may have called my doctor almost daily with fears that something was wrong. Just being able to be reassured by hearing my baby's heartbeat was an excellent feeling and it calmed me every time. Ask your doctor before renting one and make sure you are at least twelve weeks along before attempting to locate your babies heartbeat, before that usually the heartbeat isn’t strong enough to be heard. Below is a great link for renting dopplers, it’s a easy simple process and having one will bring your peace of mind.

.

 

2. Write a journal. I had so many fears and emotions about my second pregnancy that I didn’t know how to deal with them all. Writing them down really did help. Writing is therapeutic

3. Join a support group. Whether it is online (i.e. babycenter.com) or in person, a support group is essential. There is nothing that can compare to talking to other women that have walked in your shoes. The stories of successful pregnancies will also be very comforting to hear.

4. Get a compasionate doctor. It was very important to me to have a doctor who didn’t mind getting a million phone calls and questions from me. A doctor who understands your past and is sensitive to your fears is very helpful during a stressful pregnancy. Find the right doctor for you and feel free to bombard them with your fears and questions. That is their job and any doctor who understands will be happy to help.

5. Give yourself a break. You are going to be emotional and you are going to be stressed, so don’t beat yourself up for it. When you start to worry try calling a friend or a family member or write in your journal.

6. Read a book. Get your mind off of your pregnancy by getting into a good book or watching a movie. It does help to not think about your pregnancy for awhile, so keep your mind busy and try to enjoy life while you are pregnant.

7. Remember not all pregnancies are the same. It does help to know that most pregnancies after stillbirth or miscarriage are successful and that just because something went wrong in your last pregnancy does not mean it will happen again.

Don't Forget to Treat Yourself Good

Most importantly take care of yourself. Eat right, follow your doctor’s advice, exercise and love this child with all your heart. Even though losing my son was unbelievably painful, he helped make me who I am today. I am a better mother to my children because of him, I appreciate life a little more because of him and I am a more grateful person because of him. If you are reading this and you are pregnant or plan on being pregnant after a stillbirth or miscarriage I wish you a very uneventful, healthy and wonderful pregnancy

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Azlynn profile image

      Azlynn 

      7 years ago from Gisborne, New Zealand

      I am sorry for your loss as well. Congratulations on your successful pregnancies after Kenneth. All the best to you!

    • profile image

      carlene 

      7 years ago

      i agree mandee... i feel ya.

    • Mandeeadair profile imageAUTHOR

      Mandeeadair 

      7 years ago from California

      Thank you, and thanks for reading :)!

    • chspublish profile image

      chspublish 

      7 years ago from Ireland

      It's great that you took such strength from your pain of loss and had a forward looking focus to help move on. Thanks for sharing.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)