Pushing Through the Psychological Impasse
Pushing Through Psychological Barriers
I had to really push myself to get up and work out today. If it wasn't the air being too cold, it was some undefined, almost subliminal message to not work out. Angrily, I forced myself up and out into the cold and then got to the gym.
There's something else I have been noticing, which is that draggy, seemingly external force wrestling with my mind when it comes to doing ANYTHING. At first, you might actually consider to remain complacent and do nothing. In my experience, all THIS does is leave you bed-ridden. No - to maintain any sense of internal strength, we must use it to overcome these mental barriers........wherever it is they come from! Then that feeling GOES AWAY once you PUSH THROUGH IT.
After the workout, I felt for lack of a better word: truculent. It was like shoving my way through the "psychosphere" had produced a sense of hostility in myself. to calm down, I took a heaping tablespoon of Kratom. It worked. I feel calm, yet able to exercise my free-will. When I received disgusting/disturbing thoughts, I immediately repented to God for each one asking to have whatever-it-was deleted from my consciousness.
Balancing freedom with a clean, unfettered mind is a lot of work these days. No one thing works. There's taking the right medicinal/herbal remedies to this "disinformational funk". You repent for disgusting/disturbing thoughts and you try and keep a positive attitude towards the people in your surroundings. It's like a synthetic psychological wet blanket we must get out from under on a daily basis, that and really disgusting ideation that again feels like it came from an external source. Just don't submit to that "psycho-drag". Get out and do what it takes for you to feel like a powerful human being. Asking God to remove disgusting thinking hasn't failed yet for me. It beats getting angry and getting "more of the same".