ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Secrets No One Tells You About Life

Updated on September 25, 2015

There have been many times in my life that I look back on and think, "Why didn't anyone tell me this would happen?" I hope sharing some of my big life surprises might help someone be better prepared.

Rare is the 18-Year-Old Who Can Choose The Best Career Path For Their Life

When I was in high school, it was pretty much left to me to decide what I was going to study in college. I really had no idea, so like a lot of 18-year-olds, I just chose something that sounded cool. And thus began a long, arduous process of wasting money on education in careers I would end up jumping out of because I really didn't like them or wasn't good at them. Now that I am older and have found out a little more about myself, I can see that I didn't have much guidance when it came to selecting my area of study and career. There was not enough emphasis on considering your skills and personality type when deciding your life's path. And when thousands of dollars a year are on the line, it's pretty important that you nail it down as soon as possible. Otherwise, you end up like a lot of people I know, in a ton of debt for a degree they don't use. If I could go back in time, I would tell my 18-year-old self to forget what sounded cool and try examining my strengths. If I needed to take a few classes to find out what those were, community college is a great place to start. Much less money down the drain on wasted classes.

The Days Following Childbirth Will Be Some Of The Hardest Of Your Life...But Not For The Reasons You Think

When I was pregnant, I heard a lot about how I should go on dates with my husband, enjoy all the sleep I was getting, the birth would be painful and I'd be changing a lot of diapers....all the cliches. What people didn't tell me was that from the moment the child exits your body, attention no longer is on you, but on the child. Don't get me wrong, it should be, but you are going to be physically damaged, exhausted and sent home in that state with the biggest responsibility of your life. At your weakest moment in need of care, you will be taking care of someone else. I had no idea I would be wearing a diaper and Tucks (hemorrhoid pads) the first week of parenthood or that I would barely be able to sit down. Mix that with the demands of a newborn and lack of sleep, and no wonder so many women develop postpartum depression. What motherhood really is, is a journey out of selfishness and into yes, a very fulfilling, but also a very physically, emotionally and all-around challenging life.

Infatuation is Completely Different Than Love

People generally know marriage is hard, there will be days you don't like each other, blah blah blah. What people don't recognize is that there is a huge difference between the feelings you have when you first meet someone versus a true love relationship. It doesn't matter who it is, the infatuation feelings will pass. But they can, if allowed to, be replaced by much deeper, more satisfying, exciting feelings of true love. Love takes years to develop and hard work to keep. Ever notice how all the romance movies end at marriage? That's because the movie makers don't know what to do with marriage. It's the infatuation feelings that sell. It's the infatuation feelings that lead people into affairs, then they leave their spouse just to realize the infatuation feelings didn't last with the second person either. Some people spend their whole lives chasing the infatuation feelings thinking that they are really love feelings and when they are gone, they have fallen out of love. Those feelings are fun, but are definitely not feelings to build your life around.

There Are Some Things You Don't Have To Just Accept

There's accepting who you are, which I am all for, but that doesn't mean you have to live with bad habits you might not realize are dragging you down. I had always just accepted that I was a pessimist. Well, pessimism led me down the road to an anxiety disorder before I realized I had the power to change my own thought patterns. I did not and do not have to accept pessimism as a fact of my life. If you have a bad habit of eating too much, don't just say it's your metabolism (unless it truly is). You do not have to be "the fat guy" or "the fat girl" anymore. It IS possible, with some willpower and encouragement to slim down. Yes, it is hard to break habits, but we shouldn't be defined by them. If something is destructive to your life, it's time to implement change. On the flip side, adding good habits to your life is equally important. There is a great book called "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen R. Covey which outlines some common habits of successful people.

Breaking Bad Habits

So what about you? Are there things you wish you had been told sooner? Or had been better prepared for? This is a great topic for other hubbers!!


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)