- Quality of Life & Wellness
Sink or Swim
"The truth is that stress comes from your thoughts about circumstances." Andrew Bernstein
Have you ever felt as though you were swimming,but not quit swimming? You were paddling your arms as fast as you could, kicking your legs until you felt as though they were going to fall off, or heck... even tried screaming under water only to find out... that nobody could hear you? or better yet... that no one was even going to come and save you? There you are... just drowning.
This is my definition of stress. Which could be caused by multiple things in ones life. Work, children, spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, friends, family or quiet possibly the polar opposite... maybe a lack in one or more of those categories. Either way though, we all do it and we all have dealt with it in one form or another.
The reason for my quote above, was to add a positive spin to this ever going situation that always occurs and will continue to occur, because such is life. Stress.
If we can realize that it is happening when it is, it can make all the difference. We can change our mindsets to turn on and off different things. Now, I didn't say that it would be easy. It is, indeed, a process. A life long one at that, but the less stress you have, the better your health is, the better your attitude is, and the better your life will be overall.
"Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one." Hans Selye
The first key, is the ability to recognize it when it's forming.
It's that feeling building up to your eyes boiling on fire with fumes and frustration. It's that moment when you find yourself biting down on your tongue so hard that you fear it's about to bleed. When even if someone just happens to brush up against your arm, your reflexes might just tell you to jab them in the mouth. When you can feel your insides screaming and the next person who does something you don't care for is about to hear about ALL of this nonsense that is going on in your head.
These are the moments that it would be okay to walk away. To take a moment to yourself and just breathe. I know, once again, easier said than done. However, now that I have given examples, it may be easier for you to recognize and the only true question that you must ask yourself when you walk away for this beautiful moment to breathe is... "What is really going on with me?"
Okay... You haven't seen your spouse in what feels to be a week because you both work busy jobs. You speak briefly at night about figuring out a plan to pick up the kids and drop them off to school or the sitters. Who makes their lunches at night or in the morning. You argue because you never see each other, you don't feel like you're on the same page anymore. You loss touch of the things that matter because work drowns your home-life and then it feels like your home-life drowns your work life. You're busting your butt at work because you want that next promotion, you want to better your families financial worries... but you're not quite there yet. I could go on and on.... but THESE things, are the things that drive us to stress. The simple fact of missing your spouse, your children, your pets. The fact that you may just be to stubborn to admit that you just may need a long weekend away from work. These are all areas of stress in our lives, and these examples don't even scrap the surface.
But yet I see these things, how nasty and miserable they all sound and seem... and I think of a solution. Pick up the phone and call when you have a free moment just to say something as simple as "I'm thinking of you" or "How is your day" communication is key to everything and by reaching out in positive ways, positive results will follow. Use moments for guidance and lessons as apposed to talking down to someone. After all, it's not their fault if it was never taught to them. But it just may be your fault for not showing them.