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Suicide: The 'Why' That Cannot Be Answered

Updated on September 2, 2018
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Born'd in Superior, WI, grow'd in Northern MN, working vaca in FL, 7 yrs in Nashville, TN, came to Columbus, OH. Been here ever since.

A happy-go-lucky Facebook friend dies by his own hand. You've never met him, but the pain is just as real as if you were fast buddies. The 'Why?' plays over and over in your mind. Where is the answer?


Ray Parton
Ray Parton

Why Suicide?

I don't know Ray Parton from Adam. But then, I don't know Adam.

I don't know Myron Rosenberg, either. But he said, 'Accept my empathy for the loss of your friend. Any good man's demise is a loss to the world, not just yourself.'

I don't know Ronnie Odom, either. But he said, 'Hate hearing of a suicide. Of the four I have known, I always wondered if I could have changed their mind by giving them more of my time. Sad.'

Facebook exploded with 4,850 friends asking WHY?

It's Not Supposed to be that Way...

One of my Facebook friends, Clint Burgess, who knew Ray personally, addressed the WHY.

'Try as I may', he said. 'I can't understand WHY.' He went on to say he'd always went to Ray's page whether or not he liked or commented, but he always went to see what Ray had to say. This day, though, he went to read the sad laments of those disbelieving friends who couldn't understand why, either.

'Then this morning.....' he said,
'I thought I could handle coming over here to your wall and reading what you meant to others and I got to the point where I had left off last night and here I am once again with tear filled eyes. I did alright til I got to the post with Willie's song It's Not Supposed To Be That Way, you know nothing brings a flood of emotions like a good ole country song does.

Ray if you were here today, you'd know how much you impacted peoples lives, something you obviously didn't realize and sadly it's too late for us to tell you in a note, a phone call or face to face. Your life brought smiles and happiness to a lot of folks, your death has brought many tears and much sadness to those same people. No doubt about it you made this world a much better place than it was when you arrived, I just wished you'd have known it, because I have no doubt, today I wouldn't be writing this note on your wall if you'd have known it.'

It was me who posted Willie's song.

I didn't mean to make Clint cry. But, really, it's NOT supposed to be that way.

Ray Parton's Obit


Ray Arch Parton III (April 9, 1963 - June 27, 2014) Send Flowers View/Sign Guest Book | Create Memorial Website

Services for Ray Arch Parton III, age 51 of Nashville TN. And formerly of Palestine will be at 1:30 P.M., Sunday, July 6, 2014 at Bailey & Foster Chapel with Dr. J. D. Andrews and Chaplain Ray Parton II officiating. Burial will follow in Neches Cemetery. Arrangements are under the direction of Bailey & Foster. Mr. Parton died Friday June 27, 2014 in Nashville, TN. He was born April 9, 1963 in Harris County to Ray Arch Parton II and Nita Virginia Flores Parton. Mr. Parton was a manager for the radio station in Nashville and had a talk show. He was also owner of “House Rockin Productions”. He served his country in the U.S. Army and U.S. Navy. Mr. Parton is survived by his son Stephen Ray Parton of Longview, his parents Nita and Ray Parton, II of Palestine, grandmothers, Juanita Daisy Flores and Iris Grissom Parton. Pallbearers will be Greg Carter, James Kirkwood, Stephen Ray Parton, Jon D. Andrews, John Pollock, and Calvin Nicholson . Honorary pallbearers will be Frank Patterson, Jim Wells, and Stephen Nolley. Condolence calls will be received from 6:00 to 8:00 P.M. Saturday at Bailey & Foster Funeral Home. In lieu of flowers donations may be made to the Ray A. Parton III memorial fund at Capitol One Bank, P.O. Box 318, Palestine, TX. 75802.

Bambi... no, Sugar

Jan Dyer
Ray and I found this NEWBORN baby while I was displaced after the flood of 2010. We named the baby Sugar. THIS is what Ray Parton was like..... soft, gentle, loving, caring and wonderful.

Ray's Posts, 2014

Gail Carson
Ray Parton (April 9, 1963 - Friday June 27, 2014)

Ray Parton's Thoughtful Posts January 1st till June 26th:

Ray Parton...
January 1 near Nashville, TN
Cheers and Happy New Year my friends!!
May Happiness keep you sweet...
May Trials make you strong...
May Sorrows make you humble...
May Success keep you glowin'...
And may God keep you goin'...
May you all have a fantastic 2014 *Clink!*... :o)~

Ray Parton changed his cover photo.
January 1 ·
Just what are you implyin'?
That I need to change???
Well buddy, as far as I'm concerned, I'm perfect just the way I am... :o)~ —

Ray Parton
February 2
Sometimes God calms the storm...
And sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child...
G'night and may you always see God workin' in your life... :o)~

Ray Parton
February 3 ·
Hey my friends, here's my prayer for you today...
I pray that you find arms that hold you at your weakest moments, and eyes that will see your beauty at your ugliest times, with a

heart that will love you at your worst...
You are a wonderful friend & I Thank You for bein' who you are!! :o)~

Ray Parton
February 3
G'night and God bless you my friends...
May you always take time to enjoy the little things in life...
For one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things... :o)~

Ray Parton
February 8
Don't try to change people ~ Just love them...
Love is what changes us... :o)~

Ray Parton
February 14
The key to to life is understandin' we are all accountable for our actions and nothin' can stop or turn back time so make the most of

the moments you have...
G'night and God bless you my friends... :o)~

Ray Parton
February 15
Well, if you learn from your mistakes, by now I should have a Ph.D. in Screwupologoy... :o)~

Ray Parton
February 21
If you are readin' this, that means you're on my friends list which also means you are beautiful, talented and appreciated...
God has been so good to me through friends like you!!
G'night, God Bless and I thank you! :o)~

Ray Parton
February 27 ·
Lord, Your love is overwhelmingly evident, yet so often we miss it...
Thank You for the unfailing reminders of Your grace, love, and mercy...
Give us eyes to see Your beauty in Your creation... :o)~

Ray Parton
March 9
G'night and God bless...
Don't worry about what people are sayin' behind your back, they are the people who are findin' faults in your life instead of fixin'
the faults in their own lives... :o)~

Ray Parton
March 12
Heavenly Father, I know that I lack Your patience and mercy and love...
Please show Your perfect love through me in some small way today...
In Your Son Jesus’ name I pray... :o)~

Ray Parton
March 20
God opens millions of flowers without forcin' the buds...
Remindin' us not to force anything...
For things happen perfectly in His time...
G'night & God's best blessin's y'all... :o)~

Ray Parton
April 11
Always be happy, always wear a smile...
Not because life is full of reasons to smile, but because your smile itself is a reason for many others to smile...
G'night And God's Best To You My Friends... :o)~

Ray Parton
April 16
Did Anyone Ever Tell You, Just How Special You Are?
The Light that You Emit Might even Light a Star!
G'night And God Bless You, My Friends... :o)~

Ray Parton
April 20
Thank You, Lord,
for rising from the tomb to live in our hearts...
May the innocence of each child remind us of the joy of sharing Your love...
May the caroling of each bird remind us to sing Your praises...
May the majesty of each sunrise remind us to shine in Your light...
May the beauty of each flower remind us Jesus lives and is Lord of Life...
And it's good...
Thank you, Holy Father, for Easter, for Jesus, and for all Your goodness...
Stay with us this happy day and always.
In Jesus name, we thank You!
Amen... :o)~

Ray Parton
April 30
Here are five things that I'm gonna remind myself of today...
#1. Today will be my day...
#2. I am the best me there is...
#3. I know that I am a winner...
#4. I can do it, I know I can...
#5. God will always be with me...
Be positive and believe in yourself my friends... :o)~

Ray Parton
April 30
Sittin' around waitin' on life to get better will produce no results...
If you want something or want things to be different, change starts with you... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 1
Blessed are those who give without rememberin'...
And blessed are those who take without forgettin'...
G'night my friends & may the Good Lord bless you and your efforts... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 4
Lord, help me to be the best friend that I can be today... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 5
LORD, you are the One who is in our past, our present, and our future...
You know what tomorrow holds...
Help us to focus on today and to gain strength from the knowledge of your eternal presence so that the difficulties we may face will

be transformed into victories ~ Amen... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 6
Wrinkles are sure signs of where smiles have been... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 11
Dear Lord,
Thank You, Holy Father,
For Your special gift of mothers; for the example of Your unconditional love they share with their children...
Thank You for the mother who lets her child know without doubt he or she is loved, and for the child who returns that love...
Lord, today we pray You will protect and guide mothers everywhere; that You will grant them Your wisdom in loving and teaching their

Today, may children everywhere remember the warm caresses and whispers in the night; the tears dried and Band-Aids, the peach cobbler,

the laughter; and the blood curdling scream, "No!" at the brink of danger...
Thank You for the mothers who played with us, taught us, nurtured us, fed us, listened to us and tried to understand us...
Today, may we remember Mom's beauty when we were young; and her loveliness discovered as we aged...
Lord, today draw especially close the mothers who are alone, for whatever reason; and grant them Your comfort, Your pleasure, Your

And, Lord, for children who are alone, because of distance, death, or indifference, may good memories flood their minds...
And if there is not a good memory, may forgiveness burst forth from their hearts and revive in them long lost joy...
Thank you particularly for phone calls today, and for a shared "I Love You"...
Today as we honor, celebrate, or simply reflect on the woman who gave us birth, or who adopted us into her heart...
We thank You, Lord, for life, and for Mom!!
In Jesus name, Amen... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 14
Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil ~ it has no point... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 17 ·
Good things are coming down the road...
Just don't stop walkin'... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 18 ·
May the Good Lord always help us to make the right choices... :o)~

Ray Parton
May 27
Don't wait for a relationship, job, money, success or love to make you happy...
Be happy in knowin' your wonderful, unique, beautiful, dynamic and a "one of a kind" spectacular... :o)~

Ray Parton
June 1
No matter how softly you whisper a prayer, God hears and understands...
He knows the hopes and fears you keep in your heart...
And when you place your faith and trust in Him, miracles happen...
G'night & Sweet Dreams my friends... :o)~

Ray Parton June 11
We all have our own journey to walk...
God, Help me to trust in You when the road ahead seems impossible...
Lord, please help us all to trust in You every step of the way...
Today as we try to help one another along this path, Lord we put our faith in You alone to provide the way... :o)~

Ray Parton
June 15 near Nashville, TN
Heavenly Father, You are the one who knows how absolutely special fathers are...
You made them that way...
How else can a man work so hard, give so much, and love unconditionally, without your strength??
So first, Lord, thank You for fathers, for daddies...
For big, strong men with tender hearts, with hands that are calloused and rough, yet so soft and gentle when hearts need mendin'...
Lord, help children to delight this day in being with their dads, even if it must be only by phone...
May the precious memories flow, and bring laughter, and new love and appreciation...
Lord, please take care of our dads...
Though they are brave and protective, they must also be frightened sometimes, when money runs low, when we need things, when we're

hurt or sick...
Lord, when their hearts break because they can't do it all, please help us to let them know how much we love them...
And how much You love them...
Lord, forgive the men who know they are not good fathers, and help them to know when and if they can make things better, with Your

And Oh, Lord, for those Dads who keep tryin' and keep lovin' after messin' up so many times, help their children to love them even

more in return...
Lord, for that Dad who has lost a child, please let him know You are there, right beside him, for nothing else can heal a heart so

For the father who is parenting alone, strengthen him with your love...
For those whose father is already with You, please give him a hug, Lord, and tell him it's from his children...
And you, too, Lord, Happy Father's Day!!!
In Jesus' name, Amen... :o)~

Ray Parton
June 15 near Nashville, TN
God loves you more in a moment than anyone could in a lifetime... :o)~

Ray Parton
June 16
Everyday is a gift, even if it sucks...
Count your blessings, not your troubles... :o)~

Ray Parton
June 17 near Nashville, TN
When you've done everything you can do, that's when God will step in and do what you can't...
G'night and sweet dreams my friends... :o)~

Ray's Last Post

Ray Parton
June 26 near Nashville, TN
G'night and God's best blessin's to you my friends...
Nobody is perfect, and nobody deserves to be perfect...
Nobody has it easy, everybody has issues...
You never know what people are goin' through...
So pause before you start judgin', criticizin', or mockin' others...
Everybody is fightin' their own unique war... :o)~

Ray's Light posts...

Joel M Wade

In Memory of Ray Parton. Today is international kissing Day. So go to your congressman and pucker up and tell them to kiss something of yours. God speed Ray, Ray :)-

Ray Parton

June 20

I wish people were like money...
So you cold hold them up to the light and see which one's are real and which one's are fake... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 31, 2009

It was on this date in 1947... Movie co-stars Roy Rogers and Dale Evans were married on horseback... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 24, 2009

    • 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, The cat was dragging what was left of the mouse... :o)~ December 24, 2009 at 11:37am via mobile

Ray Parton

December 22, 2009

For those of you down in heart this Christmas season...hang in there. Feeling alone? Missing your soldier or family? Money problems? Health problems? The Lord knows your heart and needs. Remember brighter times and know things will be bright again for you soon. I felt the need to post this tonight. Could be someone needs to know they are not alone... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 22, 2009

Is shuttin' facebook off for the night... But tomorrow is a new day... May the good Lord bless and keep you safe tonight and give you sweet rest to be ready for tomorrow... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 20, 2009

Christmas... The time when everyone gets Santamental... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 20, 2009

Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 20, 2009

OK... What did the salt say to the pepper?... Season's Greetings... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 17, 2009

This Just In... Hundreds gather to protest global warming... :o)~

Ray Parton

December 17, 2009

The average fruitcake lasts four years... Even longer if the fruitcake is re-elected... :o)~

From his radio Mom

Virginia Moody

Gonna tell you a little story bout a boy I know
He hailed from Palestine, part of Texas Row

His daddy was a bible totter don't you know
His mama helped him tote and shake her head at that boy I know

That boy did all he could to win a star from them
But no matter how he rose they jerked the carpet from under him

Depression was an illness of the devil's spawn
and that boy and radio was definitely one

Oh he'd go home and visit playing son
and listen to the lectures, chapters and verses, every one

He'd come away depressed wondering how he failed
and never understood why daddy always said he'd burn in hell

All he ever wanted was to cheer folks up
On the radio he'd laugh and clink his cup

Never letting many see past that clown
Lord but that boy couldn't stand to see folks frown

He met a lot of folks along the way
building a fan following still strong today

Lots of women chased that funny boy
but he couldn't be caught, he was depression's toy

Then came Pam who stole his heart
He called and said I'm sober, gonna be a new start

He told me all about this new wonderful girl
Said he'd go to Nashville and give her the world

But Nashville was tough and mighty cruel
My boy didn't understand the major rule

Pam stood by him as depression set in
His failure overwhelming him cause he can't win

It's tough to love a drunk
But Pam stood strong
Putting up a front, but everyone knew
Even the boy knew he was doing her wrong

That boy was on a spiral heading oh so low
The mood swings got wider with that boy I know

On the 26th of June, in the dark of night
That boy just got done, he gave up the fight

Oh he was sober, took a gun to his head
Gonna burn in hell just like his daddy always said

But you were so wrong son
you're daddy was too

God scooped you up in loving arms
giving such comfort to you

HE said "what took you so long, I've been waiting on you"
He showed you around the brightest studio you ever knew

There was equipment there you'd never seen
Sounds so crystal clear coming from angel wings

HE said now my band's complete
My soundman is here who won't miss a beat

Ray looked back, as a tear fell down his face
He said "Dear Lord, I didn't mean to be a disgrace"

God said "Oh son, our love for each other has always been so strong
don't worry about mortals judging you, they were so very wrong"

That boy walked on into the light
as the band started playing on that star filled night

Their soundman was home, the celebration could start
laughter, high 5's, country music from the heart

Each of us will face our own judgement day
Judge not, least you be judged or so the Bible does say

The boy never judged anyone, took them all as they were
brought a smile and laughter to each, never a tear

We had a client once, was about to go down
Let's do a remote, getting him going again, bring in the clown

It was '91 in Tyler, winter so cold, our teeth chattering so loud
we played the music, cut up and joked, surprised our listeners could hear us but we stood out there proud

Pretty soon here they came, just to see us freeze away
but they shopped til they dropped, saving our client that day

Many times we did that, come rain or shine
over the years we made memories that are selfishly mine

I hope there's a cart rack in that studio above
cause my best fun of all was rearranging carts, giving a push and shove

Those commercials were a mess after I got through
you and Bobby Bell would yell chasing me out of the room

Then here comes Rick in a huff, face all red
how come station owners never believed the innocents I always pled

Then one day with your chest swelled so proud
you announced the arrival of Stephen coming into the world, crying so loud.

He'd ride in the car and your voice would come on
he'd say "that's my Daddy", his face all lit up, he'd grin and laugh, jump up and down, oh how he loved his Daddy the clown

Things didn't work out for you and his mom but he knew how you loved him as you watched him grow

The pride you took in him never failed to show

No matter where the airwaves took us, no matter where
that picture of Stephen was always there

2011 was our last show
always a hit, no matter where we'd go

The demons are gone now, no longer in control
God's hand brought you peace now to get through it all

You left Pam alone son, that wasn't quite right
but she's strong and knows the demons took you that night

So she'll get through this better than before
for you having shared part of your life with her, leaving nothing at the door

Now I've told you a little story bout a boy I know
Ray Parton I love you and am so sorry you had to go.

And Goodbye

A loss to the world. It's NOT supposed to be that way.

Clink :o)~

(Ray's friends still visit his page every day. So do I.)

© 2014 Tiana Dreymor


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