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Do You Need Help With Your Temper?

Updated on May 11, 2013
Parents always should demonstrate tolerance because of the influence that leaves lessons which are conditioning in nature to children.
Parents always should demonstrate tolerance because of the influence that leaves lessons which are conditioning in nature to children.

If you own a healthy temperament, then you’re like the season of summer when there are no gray days--everything is bright and warm. One of the best character traits to own is a good frame of mind as opposed to a routinely bad attitude. An environment can never be healthy and happy without constructive attitudes. The way essential internal attributes such as patience and tolerance are displayed are demonstrated by the behavior of language and actions.

It’s true if you don’t have anything good to say that you’re a better person for not having said anything at all. If you’re in the company of someone who has no control of temper, it’s better not to invite a confrontation. People who have an ill temper react to things in an irrational fashion--it’s like the least little thing causes them agitation.

A person who behaves consistently in a negative manner is the person you want to avoid if that person is beyond reach in converting out of misery. If such a person is irritable, the effects of being cranky will exhaust you. Every person alongside that one person who is incessantly grouchy will become offended by nearly everything that person says or does. The words that come out shouldn’t be taken personally. Miserable, unhappy and ill-tempered people enable happier people to shine brighter.

When you become a difficult person to speak with, it becomes apparent to others that your mind has developed the habit of becoming difficult. Use your own mind and imagination to develop methods on how you’re going to deal with difficult people because they will incessantly test you. The next time you’re in one of those situations, think about how you’re going to choose to respond as well as the possibilities of what the outcome could be as opposed to the type of outcome you don’t wish to experience. You can always stop listening.

People who are decidedly disagreeable solely because someone has brought to the table a good idea are the type of people who probably put a damper on anything that might accomplish something good.

Always think about your circumstance. Think about what you hear, and think about your actions afterwards asking yourself if you said or did the right thing.

Do not scream your head off.  As a result, you generate fear and insecurity.  It produces nothing good.
Do not scream your head off. As a result, you generate fear and insecurity. It produces nothing good.
There is nothing productive in yelling at each other.
There is nothing productive in yelling at each other. | Source


Don’t indulge in anger if it’s quite unnecessary. It accomplishes very little. Don’t invite anger out of stubbornness because the powers of a stubborn opinion can have control over a person. Let the stubborn opinion go so you can let go of the anger having control over you. Have an open mind. Don’t raise a gate to information just because your life has been based on opinions and advice and facts you have resolved yourself to cling to--have an open mind. The more sensible you are, the more you are aware of your own unknowingness. Don’t disallow yourself from being open to self-improvement.

Imagine two people fighting. It’s like a storm waiting for calmness to intercede. It’s like springtime one moment, the sky is perfectly clear, and the next thing you know, the sky grows darker, winds start pushing at the trees and then the thunder begins. You’re not sure which direction the storm came from and all of this turmoil within the confines of an argument that may have been set in motion from something which was completely misconstrued. That’s why it’s essential to think about the words you heard and how you’re going to choose to respond to them. If you’re going to choose to be angry with someone’s mind that may not be as capable or effective as your own, you are not displaying strength, you are showing your weakness. Don’t carry grudges towards people because they possess habits you cannot change especially if you cannot change habits in yourself that you’re capable of improving.

Here are some advantages of not becoming angry. If you stop for a moment and think about your actions and realize there is a motive to everything we say and do, you’ll realize that it’s very important to achieve a positive result. If you’re angry all the time about something, no one in their calm mind is going to wish you lived next door or hope you’ll come to work in the same office. You’ll soon be compared to the wasp nest that used to be on their porch and they will use caution the next time they see you. What kind of life is that? A person who has a temper will be avoided as though the temper were a disease. If you want productive relationships, then you have to understand a bad temper is not a healthy contribution. The well-being of society receives nothing of gain by people who respond out of hatred. We know this. Anger is like weather related acts of nature--such can lead to devastation.

When we become outraged over a circumstance we have no control over, there is no point to become abusive. We know foolish behavior and the person who causes this type of behavior might realize out of shame that he or she just looks like a fool, but maybe not if that person lacks self-awareness. Anger is a form of passion that has very unlikable effects that are hurtful and harmful. Anger can disintegrate a family, environments and cultures. At the end of the day, if you are aware that anger was not a chosen emotion over an incident which just wasn’t worth it, you will feel better about yourself in thinking about your actions and behaving in the right manner. Anger can rob a person of logic and remove conscience and produce acts of revenge that only cause harm.

It is difficult to think kind words about a person who is angry at the world everyday and especially if the anger holds no purpose. It is healthier to remain calm and to think placid thoughts. If you cling to an ill temper, you set yourself up to causing regret. You also expose a part of yourself that can have future consequences effecting friendships, marriages and other relationships. Is it worth destroying any form of a meaningful relationship? How can a person live with incessant outrage about trivial matters?

Crabby Crabsters

Cranky people are downers. People who have tempers cause the people around them to walk on eggshells. You never know the right thing to say so whether you avoid confrontation or not, you avoid these people.

It's idealistic to believe we should be kind to one another and have peaceful demeanors. That’s a nice idea, but for whatever reason, it’s a more challenging and complicated behavior to adapt for a lot of people. Sure, it’s important to have control over emotions and it takes a lot of living practice. If we have calm natures, we are better prepared to respond to urgent matters. If we possess this control, we have to walk our minds through disagreeable situations and respond accordingly. Our behaviors are enacted as a result of processed thought. It’s either well thought out in advance or when we’re impulsive, we might react without the thought.


Submit a Comment

  • ytsenoh profile imageAUTHOR


    6 years ago from Louisiana, Idaho, Kauai, Nebraska, South Dakota, Missouri

    Tams, thanks very much for your thoughtful and thought provoking comment. Much appreciate your time.

  • Tams R profile image

    Tams R 

    6 years ago from Missouri

    Too many people could learn from this hub. Sadly, the ones needing it most will argue the whole way through with a deaf ear while thinking it's everyone else's fault they are angry.

    Looking within is important and seemingly impossible for some. Getting to the root of your need to be so confrontational is key (in my opinion) to learning to communicate.

    It shocks me how people who are striking out do not hear the love coming from the calmer person and find respect for their attempts at good communication.


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