Ten Ways To Handle Anger And Reduce The Possibility Of Angry Outbursts!
Ten ways to reduce anger and "opportunities for anger" ----because places, people, and situations are opportunities for anger that you may or may not want to try to avoid depending on your personality of course although it is important to note many times at work or in public of course we cannot control who we're around or things that happen. So then, we must use coping skills (not only in the moment, but as a regular practice.) You may find that the following have a great impact also:
- Your personality- how much stimuli you can handle
- You emotions- how much control you have over them
What's In Your Personality?
Anger is an emotion we all feel from time to time, some more than others. This can partly be a result of our personality but depends highly as well on how we deal with it and how much stress/stimuli we have around us!
Some have more choleric personalities! Choleric is one of the four basic temperaments. Most people have a combination of two or more of the basic temperaments: choleric, sanguine, melancholy, and phlegmatic. A brief description of each of these is:
Choleric- most likely to get angry, and passionate
Sanguine- upbeat, positive, and outgoing
Melancholy- relaxed, sometimes depressed/sad and thoughtful
Phlegmatic- easygoing and/or lazy at times
Which of these sounds like you? You can take the personality test here.
If you took the test, which personality component did you have the highest of?
Are you overly emotional?
People who are ruled by their emotions have a very hard time controlling their anger. And those who aren't in touch with their emotions also have trouble handling anger, as they may ignore their feelings and later explode. In psychology, we study something called the Wise Mind.
The Wise Mind is a term used to describe when a person taps into both their emotional part of their mind and their logical part which in turn helps them to make more thought out decisions resulting in better choices!
It takes practice in order to become aware of your wise mind, but it can become fairly easy over time with practice. This helps a lot with making decisions more than anger but still has a way of strengthening your mind. Please read this hub I wrote on Wise Mind.
But there are other things to focus on as well, when dealing with anger such as Assertiveness as opposed to aggression or passive aggressiveness.
Have you ever heard of Wise Mind before?
Nature at its best :)
A healthy dose of "happy music" you enjoy is key!
Ten Ways To Reduce Opportunity For Anger
Let's reflect on what we have learned so far and combine that with some useful suggestions. Here is what we learned above:
- Learn about yourself. What is your personality? Be mindful of it, and how it will or will not affect your life.
- Learn how to use Wise Mind
OKAY, NOW FOR THE TEN TIPS:
- EXERCISE- It releases endorphins, and relieves stress
- DIET- Eating foods rich in protein and fiber helps as well as avoiding too much caffeine or alcohol
- MUSIC- What you listen to has a impact on your inner peace. Too much loud music can be stressful but helpful when angry, and certain types of music are very soothing.
- NATURE- Just getting sun on your face is key to keeping away depression. Long walks can be very soothing and done regularly have a peaceful effect on anyone.
- YOUR FIVE SENSES- What is around you in your home and at work makes a big difference. For example, real or fake trees (visual), quiet or soothing sounds, breeze or circulating air, clean atmosphere, are a few things that are calming and relaxing and essential to maintain a peaceful atmosphere. I suggest buying little things like waterfall devices, ocean sound machines, and light therapy with color or even just better "natural light" bulbs for offices.
- WHO YOU'RE WITH- I think you want to make sure you're not over doing it with stressful or negative people in your life! Keep a healthy balance and keep your aura positive!
- DEEP BREATHING- Should be practiced daily so it will come naturally and in handy without having to think about it. Try breathing in for four seconds thru your nose, hold for four seconds, then release out your mouth for four seconds. Do this 3 times. Another method is to sit on an upright chair with your feet flat on the floor and your hands resting on your legs, feeling your body sink into the floor and chair and be mindful of that. You may also, hold a squishy ball in your hand or an object and slowly run your hand over it as you focus on your breathing.
- TURN THE OTHER CHEEK! You may not agree but when very upset, it helps me to do this. I find it works because it's an attitude of "retreat" whereby I'm not literally turning the other cheek,but I'm letting the emotion leave for a moment until I can separate myself from the person or situation and I call it turning the other cheek because I will not get revenge but rather find a way to digest my anger in a safer place and also know that there's something wrong with that person for attacking me verbally or whatever it may be and it's on them not me.
- MEDITATION/PRAYER-I find that praying for my "enemies" or people that annoy me puts the anger away from me and releases it. I forgive and move on a lot too.
- DISTRACTION- Keep busy and don't dwell on anger or "let the sun go down on it." In relationships, make up before bed time and be the first to say "Sorry" a lot of the time even if it's not your fault- sometimes this is what it takes to keep a marriage.
I hope you have found some of my ideas helpful! Thanks, take care, and God bless!