ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Health»
  • Death & Loss of Life

The Art of Letting Go: Part 2

Updated on July 31, 2016

Letting go doesn't always mean goodbye. It sometimes mean "I will love you forever".

Part 5: Acceptance

Couple of years passed again and I have a change of heart. I am slowly accepting the fact that she already died and was in heaven with grandpa.

All those years that I cannot find her here on Earth, I was trying to accept the fact that I won’t be able to see her again. Time slowly healed the wounds in my heart but it will cannot erase the scars left by my past.

I know that I accepted the fact that she’s gone because in my dreams I know now that she was at peace. I would visit her from time to time and asked how’s heaven and if Jesus did take good care of her because I pray for it every day.

Part 6: Letting Go

Sometimes when I’m alone, I think of her. I think of her too much that she would come visit me in my dreams to console and to be with me saying she wouldn't leave. The last time was when I met her in a beautiful and very wide garden.

I was so happy to see her and after a short chat, she bade farewell again.

“It’s time for me to go,” she said.

“Where are you going Grandma?” I asked.

“Heaven,” she answered.

“Can I come with you please?” I pleaded. I know that since I was little kid it would make her say yes.

“No you can’t,” she said with a sad smile on her face. “Heaven’s a long way from here. And besides, your mother and sister would come looking for you.”

“I want to come with you please!” tears fall from my eyes.

“Okay, don’t cry anymore. But inform your mother first so she’ll not be worried when you’re gone,” she suggested.

“But...” my voice trailed off. “Will you be waiting here for me? I will just say a quick goodbye.”

“Yes, I will,” she said again. “Now go.”

I hurriedly run from the lovely garden and too late to realized that she just wanted me to leave so she could go alone to heaven. I came back running at a speed; I don’t want to say goodbye anymore, all I wanted was to come with here at that moment.

But she’s already too far to reach. I saw her float through the air up to the clouds where I think Grandpa was waiting at the top.

“Grandma!!!! Wait!!!!!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. I ran and ran while crying and regretting that I left her alone to say goodbye to my mother.

I fell down while running and I looked up to her. “Grandma... don’t leave me alone...” My voice was already an echo.

I saw her floating farther and farther away from me, Grandpa reaches out his hand up on the clouds. She looked at me and wave.

I cried endlessly in the midst of that beautiful garden alone and wishing I did not leave at the first place.

Part 7: I Love You, Goodbye

The time slowly ticked by and realized that I have to let her go. She’s with Grandpa now and he will take good care of her on the other side of life. I also realized that all those times the reason why I can’t leave her was because I thought she will be alone on her journey.

I feared that no one will be there for her. But as I saw Grandpa reaches out his hand for her, I know that she will be safe in heaven.

Even if it hurts to let her go, I have to. I have to move on with my life but a part of it will always be with her no matter what.

Maybe God stopped me from going to her home early that afternoon she died so I wouldn't have to watch her leave the world.

I still can’t forgive myself on that wrong turn I've done in my life that changed my future. It’s hard to move on when you know that you love that person so much and you just take advantage of time when they’re still around and can hug you.

Now that she’s gone, I feel mostly alone and just wanted to cry my heart out especially when I have problems.

I missed her terribly but knowing I can see her in my dreams, make it a lot better. I can’t change the past and our family’s history but maybe I can still change my future.

© 2013 Mycee. All Rights Reserved.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 4 years ago from london

      well-written and full of sincerity.

    • Vellur profile image

      Nithya Venkat 4 years ago from Dubai

      Thank you for sharing this with us. Grandma's are always very special. It is difficult to let go. Voted up.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      I'm glad that I read part two of your story, Mycee. I'm very glad that you are finding some peace, too. I hope that the healing continues.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 4 years ago from southern USA

      Yes, she is with Jesus and Grandpa and you will see your loving grandmother again one day too. She will be there with open arms for eternity!

      Voted up ++++ and sharing

      God bless you for this beautiful write. In His Love, Faith Reaper

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      You are so sweet to share this with us. You've helped us in letting go too. Thank you Spy. Be happy my friend..

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 4 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      You will see her again when it is time, Mycee. Thanks for sharing this with us.

    • kashmir56 profile image

      Thomas Silvia 4 years ago from Massachusetts

      Hi my friend, this is a beautiful conclusion to this two part heartwarming and heartbreaking story. I found out a long time ago that no mater how i fought with death, death will always win, i could not keep death from taking my girlfriend,my dad or mom,nor any of my dogs. Death is part of life,once you except that it easier when someone dies . Peace be with you my friend !

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 4 years ago from Central Florida

      Spy, what a beautiful reckoning of your heart over your Grandma's death. I love your last line. You should post that line all over your house as a reminder.

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      A fond and wonderful continuation from the first chapter of this heartwarming and heartbreaking story. I reflect on your level of understanding and interpreting this issues concerning you. You sensed and commented on another belief I have. That one being, as we are make the journey to "head home" I truly believe we are in control of how the final moments here on earth play out, so to speak. You hit on that point, knowing in your heart that your dear Grandmother did not want you to have that image of her last moments. She knew how deeply you love her and also knew the grief and heartbreak you would be coping with after her leaving.

      Your Grandmother sounds like a terrific individual. I am only sorry I never had the pleasure of meeting her.....yet. XO