The Boy Teacher and The Father Student 49; Mom and Numbers
Within the First 1,000 steps
Numbers Are Great
F: Now set it down right here boy and learn. I love your mom more than I love you. You love your mom more than me.
B: Obviously dad. Mom is first and you are second. That just makes sense. Mom is mom and you are just dad.
F: Now boy that is a natural fact and it is right. So don’t you ever look at me and feel bad that you love me second.
B: I never thought of that. Aren’t kids supposed to love their mom the most?
F: You know me, I don’t abide much by should and supposed but you are right. I think moms need love more and dads need friends more. I will study that in my brain. Maybe you should too.
B: You study it dad I am having trouble with fractions.
F: Fractions are easy boy you just have to clear your mind on them. We just did them.
B: Dad we did not just do them.
F: Oh son baby you are so wrong and that is why you are having a tough time.
Lets chit chat on it. Let us go outside. Let’s throw the football. You will mess up ten times in 20 throws. Ever wonder how those numbers work?
B: Dad you do fractions on paper not out back playing catch.
F: Isn’t that cool. We get graded on fractions on paper. I heard you only got 94% on your last score and you mom is about 88% mad at you. How many times does love go into love?
B: Totally wrong. Love is not a number. Wait maybe I get it.
F: My favorite math word is gozintoo. That was from a bad ass math doctor in college. My college degree had everything and yet nothing to do with math. Philosophy is math. Get down with that boy.
B: Brooks told me that your philosophy is math and his is art.
(Brooks is the elder son – big brother with a BA in Philosophy – mine is a BS)
F: Well now we are ready to do fractions, we have our feet on solid ground. Throw the football ten degrees from my right shoulder.
B: That is like the North Star Big Dipper Game. I get it.
F: We calculate in a circle. Right? Just like time on a clock is a fraction of some other time. Toss me the ball right two out of 4 times. Mess up the other two. Cha Ching I got all four!
Mom Was Born During a War in Her Country
No Answers Here
Lost In Space
Now we giggle and laugh a bit too much around here. One doc told me I was a genius. I asked why he was such a sad guy. He just stared at me and I told him I was not smart, I was happy. I then proceeded to preach about love. It did not take 10 breaths. He just forgot. A best friend of mine now. We laugh too hard at lunches. Of course he buys.
I have this deal type thing with cancer. My therapist says I have it down on coping. I told her I just liked her and I would be back soon. Moms and dads need to be like that. Can you even imagine a “healthcare” provider that was not a friend? Well my boy is not going to learn fractions from other than his second best friend – me.
F: Take the soccer ball and kicky it on the far right.
B: Dad that goes sideways.
F: Now we are talking fractions. Whahoo!
B: That is really weird dad.
F: I snuck some gummy bears into my pocket. How many do I have? I ate three already.
B: That is subtraction and not fractions. Oops I think I just got it. Eat this shot on goal.
B: Shut up dad. Let me have the gummy bears and think and swing my stick, and you go away.
Space is appropriate. A Professor told me that geometry required space. And to give my fiance’ some. Great advice that my boy gives me.
Sons are smarter than dads because they do no give a crap about being smart. They do not think smart they just ooze it. “Dad you can do it”. Are the finest words a father ever hears. I have issues but I got not a single one with my sons. They may have issues with this old horse though.
F: So check it out buddy there are two butt kicking fighter dudes. Tough guys with guns and stuff. I like the idea of terminator, or maybe exterminator. They search and destroy evil ones. So in this game of fractions they are fighting each other. But they have new names. They are hiding in arithmetic. “Numerator” is a piece of the other warrior who is called “denominator”. Check it out the Numerator takes a piece of the denominator. How many pieces of the body does denominator have left? Just a stupid video game.
B: You are making my video games into fractions. You are really strange old man.
F: I have never watched or played one of your games but you like them for sure. They are violent I think.
B: Dad they are “make believe” and not real.
Nobody Really Reads This Stuff
My Dad Played a Horn With This Old Man
Yes It Is "one" Out Of
F: A big 10 4 on that one buddy bring your load in we got space. What I mean is that fractions are “make believe” too. Divide your heart in two. It ain’t gonna happen. But I do have spaghetti on the hot and that is going to happen. I hope I put the right fractions into the pan. I am only 100% over 100% happy, and I reckon I said that wrong. I’m sorry you did not get 100% on your math fractions score. You want some fresh made orange juice made 100% from fresh picked oranges? Oops I have work to do like 45% of the time. I mean 45 minutes of every hour. I messed up. What is 45 minutes out of the hour of 60?
Kick the ball into my head so I do not think hard. Better happy than smart.
B: Dad those are stupid. You don’t get to choose smart. And you can choose happy.
F: Who filled your head with such nonsense?
B: My big brother and he said that he learned from grandpa.
F: Well I can’t choose to be as smart as those two. It seems to me they are right. Now do that two knee kick thing we work on, a soccer player must be in control of the ball and not responding to it. Well maybe control is over rated.
B: Your eyes are going up into the skies again.
F: Hit me with your best shot and I will show you just how right here I am, punk. Wait! Let me take off my sunglasses, that could get ugly. And why do you get the goalie gloves instead of me. This whole deal is wrong.
These odds are stacked against me and that is not fair. Check out my wink buddy.
B: Dad you are fully nuts. You were thinking all that time about the fractions and percentages and odds stuff?
F: Well you are right. I have to stop doing that weird stuff. On the other hand I just scored the shot on goal. Do you want to go play darts so I can kick your butt there again.
B: Wait I won the last game of darts.
F: Yes but I one 3 out of 4.