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The Effects Of Living With An Alcoholic

Updated on June 29, 2010

Here we all are, born into this world as such clean and pour little babies. We don't know right from wrong, and we put our lives in the hands of our parents to guild us and raise us as great adults for future years ahead.

Sometimes the upbringing is really not as it should be and we are sometimes led down the wrong path in life. Meaning, some of us see what our parents due to themselves regarding drugs and alcohol.

As we grow and start to figure out exactly what our parents are doing we tend to think it must be okay to do.

We then tend to follow in our parents footstep and become addicted as they were through our younger years of life. Seeing is believing, and if you see something over and over again throughout your life as a child you start to think that it must be a normal thing to do.

For some, we have the willpower and the knowledge of what exactly will happen if you follow the footsteps of our parents.  These people know right from wrong and the consciences associated with an addiction of any kind. 

I was one of the ones that neither parent drank or smoked at all. So what exactly happened to me?

I followed the sober life of my parents, but took the wrong path in my adult life (on my own) to get addicted to alcohol and smoke cigarettes like there was no tomorrow. As I got older and started looking for that love of my life, I realize that the bars and clubs I was going to was the wrong place to find what I was looking for.

I worked in a hospital for years and one day I notice and new girl in the switch board room that caught my eye. So, I asked some of my co-workers who this might be. Shortly after checking this new girl out we went on our first date, but she had no idea of what she was getting into if she happened to take a liking to me.

Four months of dating, and we have been married now for over 29 years, but what she had to put up with was something I am not proud of at all. She didn't drink or smoke when I met her and here I am, an functional alcoholic and a smoker. We hit it off from the very first time we met, but the life I put her through was a miserable one.

The effects of living with an alcoholic and what I did to my wife in many different ways never crossed my mind. I was almost the ruination of our marriage, by verbal abuse, threatening comments, nasty, ignorant and most of all just being like a drunk with no consideration of her feeling or the life she was living, which was just about pour hell.

My alcohol addiction then became the problem of all of us including my young children. As they got older they then knew what their daddy was really made of.

I, to this day, have regretted so many things, all due to my addiction to alcohol, and just how I treated the ones that loved and cared for me so much. It's a little hard to swallow knowing that because of my addiction, (that could of been avoided), if I only had the willpower to do so,  I could of gave my family the life and respect that they so well deserve if I were sober.

Now being clean and sober, I am living the life that should of been lived years ago. It's never ever to late to change you life. You need to just want to change, and you are the only one that can do it. Believe and you will achieved, and keep that Positive Attitude in everything you do in life and you will succeed.


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    • eshaw profile image


      8 years ago from Huntsville

      just a Question were u the alcoholic

    • Lifeallstar1 profile image


      8 years ago

      Thanks again for sharing that with all of us. I hope that you have a list of fun things planned to do with your loving family. You guys should all add to the list and do a few at a time. Live part of the life lost during those years and have a great time!! Thank again!! Jess

    • equealla profile image


      8 years ago from Pretoria, South Africa

      Mark, I have seen some people who carry on with their wild habits even when they are all alone and forsaken. They never seem to have the willpower to stop and contemplate. They never consider anything else than themselves.

      I do admire you for finding the strenght in yourself, to fight this dragon destroying your life. We are very proud of you.

      Your wife must have known that she married a man that will overcome, and just needed some time. She was right.

      It is good to tell the others about the remorse you feel in retrospect. But please, please, do not dwell on it too long.

      You have a lot of good years in front of you. Take the hands of your wife and kids, run into this promise, be grateful for time you can spend with each other.

      I wish you and your lovely family all the blessing from my heart.

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 

      8 years ago from South Africa

      You deserve applause, sir! May you be clean and sober for the rest of your life and may you never-ever stop making amends to your wife and children, for NO women and children deserve the hell created by a drunkard.


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