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How Do You Get the Ultimate Revenge Against a Narcissist?

Updated on September 27, 2017

In the world of a true narcissist, everyone should do their bidding without question and everything should be just handed to them. If you disagree with their logic or cause a narcissistic injury, they will do everything in their power to destroy your life. It can be a very frightening and stressful time for any victim. However, there are several things that you can do that terrify a narcissist. They will never let you see them quake, but it is possible. So, the question remains. How do you frighten them? How do you get the ultimate revenge? That is by going no contact, living well, and being happy. That's it. Very simple. You see, the narcissist truly believes that you need them in your life and you would be lost without their guidance or direction. They believe that they are so superior in their thinking and knowledge that it's impossible for you to do well on your own. So, proving them wrong and going out and being successful shows them that you can make it without them. Once they begin to realize that they have in fact been wrong about something, it turns their world upside down. More than likely, they will attempt to hoover you back into their life. When that fails, causing chaos in your life is going to be the narcissist's number one goal.

Going No Contact

Your first course of action should be removing the toxic person out of your life. Narcissists have the ability to use both halves of their brain to think quickly and strategize against a target. So, surmising that a form of retaliation is going to put a halt to the attacks is wrong thinking. But if you completely ignore the narcissist, he can’t hurt you. That means refraining from engaging in communication of any kind. It could also mean discontinuing relationships that you have with mutual friends of the narcissist. You have to get to a place where you expect nothing out of them and then they cannot hurt you anymore. Narcissists do not have any sense of empathy or remorse for anyone, including their own children. Even though they are very good a mimicking empathy for others, they don’t care and they never have.

Enjoy Life and Live Well

To live well begins with going “no contact” with the narcissist and focusing on improving you. The narcissist will more than likely begin the smear campaign to try and destroy your reputation within your social circle. When this happens, you have to protect yourself when necessary. Confide in a mutual associate that seems the most reasonable and explain your side of the story. After you have done that, just move on. Focus on doing well at your place of employment, taking some new exercise classes to get in shape, go on vacation with a new set of friends, anything to keep your mind off of the shenanigans manufactured by the narcissist. Just completely ignore him.

When the narcissist sees that you are not engaging at all, he will try to Hoover you back into a relationship. Now, of course, accepting that they were wrong about something is never going to happen. However, the narcissist will come up with a fake apology and give the appearance that he is truly on the path of healing. However, the fake apology is only a tool that the narcissist uses temporarily to get back into your life to create more tribulations. When you decline to let them back in, the narcissist is more likely to rage.

Finding Your Place of Happiness

Once you have left a narcissist relationship, many victims generally feel worthless and lack self-esteem. Work on building your confidence and happiness will follow. In some cases, it takes years before you can make it to a place of true self-confidence. From personal experience, I had to go to therapy to work on growing inner strength and understanding on what I wanted to do with my life. I had experienced years of abuse and I didn’t know anything else. I was truly lost. But once I got a solid footing, it was like I had a fire that was lit underneath me. I wasn’t afraid to speak out about my abuse and I wasn’t going to take any more abuse from anyone else. That meant everything from snide remarks to the physical mistreatment of me. Once you find your place of happiness, no one is barging through the barrier that you have built for yourself. You will feel truly free.



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