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Warning: New Year Resolutions Doomed Unless You Do This

Updated on January 26, 2010

January is just a few weeks old and New Year resolutions are fading fast. Maybe just a distant memory…

I gave up New Year resolutions several years ago. I just didn’t need one more thing for which I could beat myself up! It’s good to know most experts agree that resolutions generally don’t work anyway.

But when the New Year arrives, I feel compelled to have a ritual that benchmarks the occasion. Here’s how I greet the New Year.

I create a theme for the year. It is usually one or two words that I set as my intention or focus for my year. Then I find a song that helps me connect to that intention. And I chose a color.

It’s still January – go ahead and put your theme together now and you’ll get to the end of the year with more success than you ever had with a resolution.

Last year was a beautiful year for my theme of “ALLOWING”. I am somewhat of a perfectionist and I like to be in control of my world – “general manager of the universe” might apply here. Maybe some of you can relate to that.

My intention for 2009 was to step aside, observe, and become aware…

So as circumstances and situations presented themselves, I chose not to jump in and take charge. I consciously “allowed” things to be what they were without needing to be fixed or solved… by me.

I “allowed” people to ask for what they needed rather than taking responsibility for their needs.

Allowing became my way to connect more consciously with God. Everything is as it should be and I don’t need to make other people right or wrong. I can just allow other people to be who they are, with their own thoughts and beliefs.

Choosing a theme isn’t something you have to stress out about either… You can’t possibly choose a wrong theme. Close your eyes, breathe deeply into your heart and your theme will just show up in your consciousness.

Once I chose my theme of “allowing” then I looked for a song that could trigger the emotions I connected with that intention. My song was by the Bellamy Brothers, called “Let Your Love Flow”. I loved the chorus, “…Just let your love flow like a mountain stream… And let you love grow with the smallest of dreams… And let your love show and you’ll know what I mean…”

I also chose a color for the year as a visual cue to reconnect with my intention for “allowing”. The color I chose was peach. I bought a peach candle for my room and occasionally would treat myself to a few peach roses.

Setting a theme, choosing a song, and selecting a color are simple things you do to create a shift in your focus…it’s fun. And the best part is you cannot fail. There is no way you’ll get to the end of the year and not meet your “resolution”, because a theme has no expectations of something you have to do or accomplish. It comes from the heart.

Does this make sense?

This year I have chosen the theme, “Radiant Vision”. I am so excited because it is a visual theme and I am feeling the need to focus on pictures this year.

The subconscious mind actually thinks in pictures, not words. And I have been reading about that lately. For example, if I tell you not to think of a lemon… POP! The image of a lemon shows up in your mind. If I tell you not to slam the door… the image that shows up in your mind is “slamming the door”.

That’s how our conscious mind operates. Pictures. And pictures are a compelling way to move forward when you want to make changes in your life. I plan to create a vision board and really focus on what images I allow into my subconscious this year.

The color I have chosen is yellow. I got some yellow ribbon and have tied a few “yellow ribbons” around my favorite house plants. I also got a few sunflowers for my kitchen. To me, sunflowers are a radiant flower. So I will look forward to treating myself to sunflower bouquets this year.

I found the perfect song by Jana Stanfield, she has a reputation for her heavy “mental” music. It’s called “Bring It On”. The message in the lyrics that speak to me of change and a new vision come from the chorus, “…Bring it on… Everything new… Everything different… Everything true… I am ready for the next thing to do… Bring it on… Everything new…”

So I am excited about my year of “radiant vision”. I invite you to spend time this week creating your New Year theme. And you’ll discover how much you look forward to a new year, a new intention, and a new you.

Theresa Thompson, Author, Coach and Spokesperson for Healing Divorce and Improving your Life, is a co-creator of the weekly teleclass series Heal Divorce. Theresa believes that a tender, accepting relationship with yourself is the only ingredient you need to create the blissful, loving relationships of your dreams. You can get a free copy of her strategies, “Avoid the Top 10 Mistakes Women Make After Divorce” at


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