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What Do You Want? Recreating Yourself After Retirement
How Choice Theory helps change perspectives
What Do You Want? Recreating Yourself after Retirement
Not many people have the luxury of being healthy enough to retire at an early age. I am one of the fortunate few. When Governor Walker killed my union last year, I had enough time in and savings earned to pull the plug, in fireman’s terms. Now this hub is not about politics or unions, but needless to say, I still anger over the fact that the only reason I was able to afford a house and a decent living was thanks to lots of people who walked picket lines and fought hard for human rights regarding public employees.
What this is about is what happens next. This is really about how Choice Theory has helped my point of view as I transition to another stage of development. Choice Theory helped me understand that I was more, am more, than a job title. My scales began to balance when I decided to look in the mirror and see a human being and not a “public employee”.
The first question I asked myself was “What do I want?” My mom wanted to be left alone, as I wrote in the last Hub. I, myself want to offer my wisdom and my story to the world. “What are the specifics of that?” was my next question. Being honest about that has been extremely difficult and I still struggle with it. The problem relates to having made mistakes and having hurt people which resulted in my deciding to see myself as a failure and rejected coward, rather than a gifted human spirit. My way around that issue has been shown through the realization that the past, while always with us, is just that- the past. We can only behave in the now. Thus, “What do I want now?”
Question one B has been “With whom specifically, do I desire to connect with?”
The specific people I want to connect with are not teachers or other public employees. That was an eye opener for me, and it goes back to the quality world picture of myself. Seeing myself as a ‘teacher’ of children meant that I was willing to limit myself to those under 14. Pretty small group, eh? The limits really were more about fear, an emotion we all have, but one that only great people conquer, than about wanting to be around ten year olds, in order to fulfill my needs.
I want to connect with the world. I want to tell my story to people who need hope. People who are looking for a different way of viewing the world are my audience. People who have made a decision to stop feeling sorry for themselves are the receivers of my gifts. If anyone is interested, great. If not, great. All we do is offer people information; they do what they want with it. Viewing the world through this lens means that have nothing to fear regarding my offer.
The next part of my recreation has been focused around the question, “What are you doing to get what you want?” Now really, that answer has been more negative than I first imagined. Ready cyberspace? Yes I have a web site. Yes I give talks for people. Yes I write these hubs. Yes I have been published in numerous places besides Hub Pages. But Have I really, really, charged ahead? Honestly, no.
What does this mean in real terms? I am revising my website. I am revising my coaching concept to target retired baby boomers and people who are changing their life styles. Teachers are always welcome, they need me, but at a different level. I am charging ahead, in love. I am offering support to anyone who is willing to accept it.
I want to lose thirty pounds; I have lost 12 and have played yo yo diet for three weeks. I want to exercise. Do I? Not really. I want to eat well. Do I? Only if you call chocolate and carbs healthy dieting. I am not writing this to self pity or self recriminate. I am honesting. Bottom line, I am not doing a lot to get what I want.
In writing this, the next question emerges. “Are you willing to look at things a little differently?” The answer I want to write is ‘no’. The honest answer is ‘yes’.
How so? What is the plan? Here is where mindfulness begins to influence my new creation. I know I feel great when I exercise. I know I feel great when I drink lots of water. I know I feel fabulous when I golf and walk and lift weights and swim.
As I mindfully write this Hub, I am realizing that the only thing I have to fear is fear. How FDR. I have no people to fear. I have no issues to fear, eventually, the universe changes. How many of you have read when I asked How important are you, really?” As I reconnect with the living, I can choose the life I, myself, want to live. While I have letting go of past hurts and relationships is difficult, I have decided that they are always with me, but that I will behave in the now. If people provide hate, I can listen or not. If people use supporting and relationship building skills, I can listen or not. How novel.
I know that eventually I will get ill and die. The trick is to live until then and leave a legacy of love to anyone who needs it. The theme is to love even in the midst of hatred. The target is to be an example of how to grow up hard, make serious mistakes and survive long enough to offer the world some goodness. The world is not about Mike Rospenda, the Abundant Old Soul. The world is about what Mike Rospenda, the Abundant Old Soul, can offer people who are willing to look at things in a new way.
The world is open and flat. I have a story to share and a way to offer help to anyone who is interested. Why not? And yep, I have remembered to keep dreaming dreams because that’s when I see miracles. Only now, I have decided to be open to accepting them.
Keep dreaming dreams and you'll see miracles