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Where is the Gentleness?

Updated on November 19, 2014

Have no doubt that this mother is gentle with this child.

How many ways can we be gentle?
How many ways can we be gentle? | Source

Gentleness abounds

Have no doubt that gentleness is everywhere we look but yet there is still not enough. We have seen gentleness in such strange places as a battlefield or how a homeless person cares for a dog. We see gentleness in how mothers care for there babies and how spouses care for each other. We can see it in how a young child approaches a beautiful flower and we can see it in in a father as he teaches a youngster about dangers.

There truly is so much gentleness in the world.We who see it are usually touched by it and certainly those who receive it are touched by gentleness. And truly I tell you that those you act in gentleness are given a blessing here in this world.

So where is the emphasis on gentleness? It is just lacking. We see it but not enough. The father tells the young child to be gentle with the newborn or the puppy. He hopefully also shows this gentle way of acting. And if the parents are good they teach gentleness toward each other that the child will learn to copy. But have you ever seen or heard of a class in gentleness? Have you ever seen a report on news about gentleness or even read about it in a magazine of newspaper? Is there a gentleness seminar or self help group?

Let us look at gentleness.

Gentle on my mind.

How are we gentle.

It is tempting to write out a definition here but that would not really add to the discussion of gentle. So let us look at ways in which we are gentle.

Voice: How easy it is to be loud. How easy it is to be gruff. How easy it is to be short. And how easy it is to be rude. It is said that the words we use are what overflows from our heart. We can start a journey toward a more gentle self simply by changing the words we use and the tone in which we use them. I once studied under a man who was a trial attorney and contrary to our general notions of the sharp and cantankerous tones and attitudes we would associate with such men he was gentle. He did not win every legal little battle but he won the hearts of the juries and judges he encountered and therefor was a winner of cases and the heart. And I have seen preachers who were bombastic and sharp with their attitudes and they lost the hearts of their followers.

How much more so is it important for the teacher or the parent to be gentle. How much more so can mean and spiteful words hurt than with a child.

We must be gentle in order to teach gentleness and the best way to start is with the voice.

How gently does this cousin teach his nephew to play piano?

Quietness and gentleness are our best guides to teaching.
Quietness and gentleness are our best guides to teaching. | Source

How about you?

Does your gentleness shine through?

See results

How do we show the gentleness?

Touch: A gentle caress. A gentle kiss and a warm handshake. Of course the gentle hand on the shoulder or arm are all great ways of showing and being gentle. There are different types of hugs and the best is the gentle hug. We can all do the bear hug. We can all do the hug and pats on the back. And we can all do the fake kiss and "arms length" hug so as not to wrinkle clothes or get to close.

But can we do the gentle hug? Yes we all can and should more often. We just need to set our intentions to do it. Can anyone even state that a gentle hug did not make them feel better no matter what? And that brings us to receiving gentleness.

A gentle and kind moment of peace.

Source

How do we receive gentleness?

One of the finest ways in which to give gentleness is to receive it with grace and returned gentleness. How we receive a gentle touch or a caressing voice is critical to our own gentleness.

I cannot speak for you but this author has often rejected gentleness when in a fit of some sort. "Just leave me alone!". Sometimes our own frustrations get the better of us and we fall into a rut so bad that we reject gentleness. Sometimes our anger at someone makes us not willing to accept gentleness and this is sad indeed.

When given gentleness we need to slow down and breath. We need to let ourselves be consumed by the love that goes with gentleness. Yes sometimes we just want to be mad and all uptight. But not really. So we need to get over our big bad selves and show the gentleness in return and make it a great love fest. If that sounds silly then too bad for you. If it sounds good then you are a gentle person who may just need a gentle reminder.

Yes gentleness is all around us.

There still is not enough gentleness in this world. How about strangers. Can we do that? Can we be gentle to another in a rough and tumble world. Just think about the check out lines that are creeping up on us during this abhorrent shopping season. Can we be gentle and kind in these places. Can we be gentle to those in front and behind? Can we give warm and fuzzy smiles and greetings to clerks and assistants in the malls? Can we exude gentleness and it's brother kindness?

A fun thing happened just yesterday. My four and a half year old came into the kitchen and got to close to the stove that I was cooking on. Of course this is a big no no. I was furious with him. But for some crazy reason I knelt down and gently told him again that this was not good and he was not to get close to the stove. He in return gently touched my arm and promised not to do it again. Gentleness begets gentleness and understanding.

A not so gentle reminder!

This article was written by Eric Dierker. I reserve all rights to this article and desire no duplication without attribution. On the other hand feel free to share the content just let folks know where it came from. Copying it and claiming it as your own would be stupid and subject you to my legal harassment of you. Besides if someone asked you what it meant you would not know so yes it is copyright protected as original work by me. Just leave a comment to ask to use it elsewhere and please share it.

To read more by this fascinating author visit www.thedierkerblog.com, Eric Dierker on Facebook and Pinterest and my sweet blog resipsaloquitor on google blogs.

OK I admit it, I need more publicity. If you steal this content please let me know so I can make a big deal out of it and get some press time.

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    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Beautiful message this morning, buddy! I like the part about needing to show gentleness in order to teach it....yes indeedy!

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      For some reason this kind of jives with your hub this morning. Gentleness is a rule we should all live by -- but I am preaching to the choir here, thanks for dropping by and adding a comment.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Isaac Weithers 2 years ago from The Caribbean

      Eric, I love that you took the time to mention the attitude of the receiver; because the offer of gentleness benefits the offerer, not the recipient unless it is graciously received. We need to be so aware. Yes, I agree that gentleness is all around. Thanks.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dora I reckon most good things in life somehow require a giver and a receiver. And they are equally important.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 2 years ago from southern USA

      Aw, Dear Eric, here you go again with another beautifully written and insightful hub. What a wonderful topic for a hub! You have expressed yourself in such a gentle manner that speaks volumes about the condition of your heart. So true, from out of the heart, the mouth speaks.

      We all have those days that do not go so well during our frustration moments, and that is the time, especially, when we need to stop and think before reacting. Your beautiful example with your son and the stove is priceless and perfect to share here.

      There is gentleness and kindness all around us, and let us do our part to add to such gentleness in this world.

      Up ++++ tweeting, pinning, G+ and sharing

      (((Hugs)))

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dear Faith I thank you for your kind words and support. Down deep truth be told this hub came from an early morning bout where I was not gentle with myself and it made me think. We all need more gentleness and right now is a good time to start.

    • dilipchandra12 profile image

      Dilip Chandra 2 years ago from India

      I see all the time in your hubs, beautiful sentences and good flow of words. Well this attracts me to your hubs my friend. I try to create every time around me a very friendly environment with gentleness. I just like to speak with people and mingle with them in a friendly way and i succeed all the time in creating a happy atmosphere. Well, sometimes some people doesn't like to be friendly and i have come across such people too but that is once in a blue moon and i do not bother and never take those things serious. I just like to be happy and make people around me happy and now i am happy again after reading your so nice hub and more happy for having a good friend like you :)

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Being gentle is a great approach to life.

    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 2 years ago

      All of this and more from a kind and gentle man , husband , friend and father ! No surprise that it's you Eric !..........:-}

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 2 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Such a gentle hub to emphasize the importance of 'Gentleness'!

      I believe gentleness is all around us and if we have a gentle approach towards everyone, it will come back to us.

      Thanks for sharing this beautiful, insightful and thought provoking hub.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      dilipchandra12 Thank you for your kind words of inspiration. I really like learning the new stuff on your hubs - Berkelium was a great one. (but I am biased as my daughter lived and schooled there)

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      DDE You are so right!

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ed you are so kind and gentle with me, I really appreciate that and I need it as a reminder of how I should act toward others. I just loved your recent on coy wolves Thank you.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      ChitrangadaSharan, I definitely believe as you do. And in the case of gentleness it is almost immediate. Let us, you and I try to be very gentle.

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 2 years ago from New York

      "...get over our big bad selves" I think that sums it up totally! To be gentle starts in the soul and emanates without even trying. A gentle soul leads to a gentle person. If we're too in love with ourselves we can't be in love with others.

      As always, I loved your pictures that fit in so well with your words and thoughts.

      Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Hi Mary, it is great to hear from you! Thank you for visiting and the votes. I always like to say, good and bad things in life are "inside jobs" we must start way inside and then the good comes out.

    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 2 years ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      Gentleness is indeed becoming a lost art! Just today, I was impatient with my daughter because of something that had nothing to do with her. It is easy to slip and let ourselves be rude and crude without much thought, especially when things are not going our way. Thanks for the great reminder!

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Denise I am glad you enjoyed this piece and I think that as usual I wrote it as much as a reminder to myself than anything else.

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 2 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Can we do the gentle hug? Of course and it should come with sincerity as well. I know when people fake it on me (specially at work) but that's alright, I still want them to feel I am sincere.

      Now, hugs to you on this Thanksgiving Day from a strong person (me) with a gentle soul. :)

      Beautiful message. Voting up and passing along the good vibes.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      CrisSp Happy happies to you and yours on this marvelous Thanksgiving day. "strong person with a gentle soul" nails it perfectly. Thank you for your support.

    • Harishprasad profile image

      Harish Mamgain 2 years ago from India

      When I read this hub, I was tempted to see the exact meaning of gentleman, and I found out that gentleman means a courteous, chivalrous and honorable man. I also searched the meaning of gentlewoman and that means a woman of noble birth or good social standing. Eric, I think, you have broadened the meaning of gentleman/ gentlewoman. This hub says beautifully what gentlemanly behavior is all about.

      Sometimes, we lose temper and say some harsh words, but the next moment we regret our rudeness. You remind us of sticking to our sane behavior.

      This hub is such a sweet reminder that I express all gratitude to you with all my heart. Your words are like light in the darkness. Thank you very much. Voted up and shared.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Harishprasad, What a wonderful addition to this humble hub, you have added to it greatly. On our National Holiday of Thanksgiving I give thanks for such good friends such as you.

    • vespawoolf profile image

      vespawoolf 2 years ago from Peru, South America

      It´s true, gentleness is not very common in this world. These are good reminders of how to show gentleness in everyday life. That was a good lesson with your son, that gentleness often does a lot more than harsh words.

    • SAQIB6608 profile image

      SAQIB 2 years ago from HYDERABAD PAKISTAN

      Just good enough. I loved reading it. Gentleness is indeed what we have to inculcate. The way we speak, interact, react and live. Very valid discussion. Voted UP !!

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Hi Vespa, thank you for coming by and leaving such a thoughtful comment. Gentleness may be the best teacher.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Saqib for your thoughts and contributions.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image

      Rolly A Chabot 2 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Morning Eric....

      To know gentleness is to be able to write of it in such an elegant way. Touching my friend and a good message to start the day with...

      Blessings as always

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Good morning Rolly, it is great to hear from you. Thank you for your kind words. You are very encouraging.

    • Joyfulcrown profile image

      Joyfulcrown 2 years ago

      Eric, Thank you for this reminder! Sometimes we can get so caught of the life that we forget. This was beautifully written.

    • Ericdierker profile image
      Author

      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you much Joyfulcrown. I like to think most of my writing is just reminders to people about what the already know. It is good of you to leave such an encouraging note.

    • swilliams profile image

      Emunah La Paz 2 years ago from Arizona

      Another great article which reflects a vital aspect that is overlooked in such a busy world absorbed with self-seeking pleasures so- much so- that one of the most important fruits of the spirit which surrounds gentleness is lost.

      Thanks for sharing this meaningful article! As always I love the original pictures! Voted up and tweeted out!

    • Ericdierker profile image
      Author

      Eric Dierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you much Emunah for your support and for such a lovely comment. Truly gentleness is seen in those filled with spirit.

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 22 months ago from LOS ANGELES

      The world can definitely use more gentleness and kindness. My cousins son- who is not quite two- was gently rubbing a cute puppy the other day and I thought to myself "how endearing to see" he was so gentle with the puppy, usually hes wild just like any two year old. It was touching to see.

    • Ericdierker profile image
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      Eric Dierker 22 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Hi Dana. Aren't those little ones fascinating, and instructive. Some times my boy will just come up and gently touch me and ask how I am doing. No matter the circumstance it always brings a refreshing pause of joy to feel the gentleness.

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